February 7, 2007 UC Families Newsletter Circulation: 918 Moderator: Karie Frasch email: ucfam@lists.berkeley.edu Website: http://parents.berkeley.edu/ucfamilies Post a Message or a Reply: http://parents.berkeley.edu/post_ucfam.html ----------------------------------------- * Contents ----------------------------------------- New Postings *Health insurance for high risk pregnancy – ***This person needs immediate responses!*** *Divorced parents and the academic job market *Parenthood and residency *Mature housesitter in East Bay Responses *Spit-up, puddles, and pee oh my! New members ----------------------------------------- * New Postings ----------------------------------------- ***Moderator note – This person is looking for immediate responses!*** Health insurance for high risk pregnancy ------------------------------------------- I am over 40 and trying to figure out the best health insurance for what is considered a ''high risk'' pregnancy. I am drawn to Blue Cross Plus (POS) because of the combined HMO and PPO aspects. However, I have heard some horror stories. One woman told me that Brown and Towloand (through Blue Cross Plus) approved some tests/procedures at Pacific Fertility Center. the woman did the procedure and then B&T they disapproved it. She said she's also heard of others where this happened. I am also considering kaiser, health net and pacific care HMOs. Anyone who can help through this complicated mess of insurance would be greatly appreciated. I need to sign up by end of day tomorrow, so time is of the essence. Eve divorced parents and the academic job market ------------------------------------------- I'm working on my PdD and would like to hear from other parents who are divorced or who have never been married to their child's other parent how they handle the academic job market. What if the only job offers I get would require for me to move out of the area, thus making it necessary for me to seek legal permission from the courts to move out of the area without losing custody and renegotiate the children's schedule with my ex spouse? I love my children dearly, and I want my future career as an academic to be a blessing to them rather than a burden. but I keep turning over in my head these two opposite scenarios: the happy dream of getting a local job offer so that our children can keep the same schedule with me and my ex and stay at their great school and keep all their friends while our quality of life goes up because I have a job; and the terrible nightmare of getting a job somewhere far away, so that the children possibly end up with much less time with one of us, or having to give up on my career in order to be there for the children. My ex is fairly aggressive and hostile, which doesn't help my morale much when I think of the nightmare scenario... Thanks in advance for your responses. Thanks! parenthood and residency ------------------------------------------- Hi, I have a 10 month old son and will have to face returning to work this July. Back in 2005, I postponed residency to have my baby. I just finished interviewing at 12 different programs across the country. They all went well and I am really excited to get back into medicine. BUT I am terrified that I probably have forgotten EVERYTHING! Yes, I plan to review my textbooks, etc for a refresher course...but if anyone has had similar experiences, advice, feelings on this matter--please share! Thank you! Viet Vu MATURE HOUSESITTER AVAILABLE in EAST BAY ------------------------------------------- 35 year-old MFT intern available for long-term housesitting position while you go on work travel or sabbatical. I have excellent skills with dogs and cats, grew up with a father who was a veterinarian working in the hospital, and have done a lot of local dog and catsitting, long and short -term both. I have excellent references and will treat your home as my sanctuary. Email me and we can talk further. Thank you, Kathryn --------------------------------------------- Responses --------------------------------------------- Original post: Spit-up, puddles, and pee oh my! -------------------------------------- On a recent weekday morning I got dressed for work, got my four-year-old fed and dressed, and nursed and dressed my 6-month-old. After gathering together what seemed like enough supplies to go away for the weekend and getting ready to walk out the door, the baby spit up all over herself and me. We went back to the changing table for a new outfit, changed my outfit, and attempted to leave again. On the way to the car my four-year-old fell in a puddle, requiring us to go back in the house for a new change of clothes for her. Finally, we all got in the car and drove away, only for me to realize that I had left the lunch at home on the table. Once we arrived back in the driveway the four-year-old decided that she needed to pee immediately. Sigh. Does anyone else want to share their favorite trials and travails or advice about going back to work after having a newborn? -Moderator Response: Spit-up, puddles, and pee oh my! ------------------------------------------- Esteemed Moderator, Well, I can certainly relate on the spit-up issue. The first six months of our baby's life were all about spit-up. She spit up on herself, on us, on the furniture, on the floor. The dry cleaner started greeting me on a first-name basis. Every day we'd send her to daycare wearing one set of clothes and get her back wearing something else--sometimes some other kid's clothes, because she'd gone through all of her own. In photos of baby's first Christmas, she is wearing a different outfit every hour, as I attempted to keep her respectable-looking while picture-taking was going on, and eventually I appear in a new outfit as well. We learned that if you stuff clothes covered in spit-up into the laundry hamper and forget about them, they turn into scary science experiments, all black and furry. We learned that ''burp clothes'' don't really cut it--baby blankets provide more extensive protection (we joked about just changing into mechanics' jumpsuits as soon as we got home). We learned to check the back of our clothes at the end of day for evidence of stealth attacks. We endured well-meaning advice on how to ''cure'' her, and endlessly repeated our mantra, ''It doesn't seem to bother her, she's just a baby that spits up a lot.'' Then finally, finally, it cleared up, and we moved on to the next thing. Now I hardly ever think about spit-up, except when I notice a few enduring stains on the upholstery, or when I watch the one video that caught her in the act and preserved it for posterity. As a second-time mom, you probably know better than we did at the time that ''this too shall pass.'' Perhaps one moral is: however stressful it is to juggle work and family life, at least work (usually) provides a sanctuary where for a few hours no one is spitting up on you. Clean Shoulders Once Again --------------------------------------------------------------------- - Post a message * http://parents.berkeley.edu/post.html - Subscribe, Unsubscribe, Address Changes, Help * http://parents.berkeley.edu/subscribers.html