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Books about Raising Boys
Any good recommendations for books about raising boys? My sister has 2
boys, and is having a hard time understanding ''boy'' nature, as we grew
up in a girls-only family. I looked in Amazon, but the list is huge. Has
anyone come across a book that you really liked, with good insights on boy
psychology and practical advice? Thanks!
That wasn't really enough information to give a proper
recommendation--how old are the kids
and what is the age difference and what are the conflict points so far.
Can your sister not
handle the rough housing or is it that one boy bullies the other,
etc.,etc. Are there
school issues? Is she a single mom? Does she feel the boys need role
Anyway this is what I've found useful: 'Raising Cain' and 'Real Boys'
and for the sibling
issues--'Siblings without Rivalry'.
The general ideas are that there is a boy code; there are gender
straight jackets; schools
tend not to address the emotional life of boys.
dad to boys
A classic boy book is: Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of
Boys. I would highly
I found the book ''The Trouble with Boys: A Surprising Report
Card on Our Sons, Their Problems at School, and What Parents
and Educators Must Do'' by Peg Tyre an eye-opening read.
Mother of 2 boys
As the mom of 3 boys I found the book ''Bringing up Boys'' to be
invaluable. It really
helped me understand the role of testosterone in boys. It helped me to
embrace their energy. It has some decidedly Christian undertones and I
skipped a few parts
that were overly preachy for my tastes. But overall I am glad I read the
even the cat is male
Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys by Dan
Kindlon and Michael Thompson. It's great!
While not specifically just for boys, the series of books by
Louise Bates Ames has really, really helped me. There's one for
each year, ''Your One-Year-Old,'' ''Your Two-Year-Old,'' etc.
I check them out of the library each year about 3 months or so
before the kids' birthdays. She does address more typical boy
versus girl behaviors and one really good thing about her books
is she recognizes that there are a range of temperaments. (I just
attended a talk by a some family therapists and when asked about
some particular parenting technique books, their issue was that
often these books only really work with certain temperaments or
developmental phases.) They are a quick read, well written and
give you a good understanding of each developmental phase and
what certain behaviors that we might not understand are about .
Some of their examples may be a bit dated and not
but I have found year after year they have really hit the mark on
what my children are going through.
mama of an boyish boy
Hi! I'm looking for some resources about parenting a boy. I'm
really starting to notice some differences between my 14 month-
old son and other children his age (particularly girls). I'd
like to do some reading on male child development. Any
I think Raising Cain is an excellent choice. I came from 3
girls and did not have quite the understanding of boys energy
vs. girls. This provided me with insight.
My husband loves the book ''Raising Boys'' by Steve Biddulph.
From Publishers Weekly
Australian family therapist Biddulph (Manhood) joins the chorus
of counselors calling for a focused, supportive approach to
parenting boys. Citing such gender specific risks facing boys as
a higher percentage of learning disabilities to greater threats
of violence and suicide, Biddulph maps out parenting strategies
for three distinct stages of growth, from birth to six years,
from six to 14, and from 14 to adult. Choosing not to mince
words, he advises fathers, for instance, ''if you routinely work a
fifty-five or sixty-hour week, including travel time, you just
won't cut it as a dad.'' Citing studies that show boys are ''more
prone than girls to separation anxiety,'' he suggests keeping boys
out of child care if possible before the age of three. He
recommends delaying school entrance by a year to give boys time
to develop fine motor skills, and calls sports a ''double-edged
sword'' which, while enormously beneficial, can also encourage
negative traits if sportsmanship is eclipsed by an obsession with
winning. Biddulph delves into physiological matters, examining
and explaining the role testosterone plays in shaping male
children, and talking frankly about sexuality. Enhanced by
plentiful sidebars, photos and cartoons, the material is
presented in digestible chunks, and each chapter wraps up with a
summary section, ''In a Nutshell.'' This highly practical guide
offers valuable perspectives to parents of both boys and girls.
Copyright 1998 Cahners Business Information, Inc.)
I have 2 sons, age 16 and 19. The two books which were eye
openers for me were: Raising Cain, by Kindlon & Thompson 2
psychologists who have worked extensively with adolescent boys.
They really helped me understand why school and my younger son
were like oil and water. And Why Gender Matters by Leonard Sax.
Sax's book goes over more recent cognitive science and
neurological info about the hard wire differences between boys
and girls. This was really helpful. As a mom of boys, I have
said a million times, ''Why do I have to yell in order for you to
pay attention'' In fact, when my younger son was 3 I had his
hearing tested. Hearing tests perfect! but I still have to yell.
Sax explains why. So it takes the judgment out of the
situation. Boys like higher volume.... rock and roll, the
decibel level of computer games, etc. Read Sax' book, it won't
tell you how to parent, but it will allow you to stop applying
inappropriate social rules and let your son be a boy. I'm
getting along much better with my son.
_Raising Cain, Protecting The Emotional Life of Boys_, by Dan
Kindlon and Michale Thompson.
_The Scientist in the Crib_ (can't recall the author) was also
interesting and pointed out some differences betweein boys and
girls and are two books I enjoyed.
mom to a boy
As a Early Childhood Education major and former preschool
teacher and mommy to a 6 year old little boy, I have some very
good recommendations for you. The following two books were
excellent and I learned a lot about boys from them: The Wonder
of Boys by Michael Gurian and Raising Cain by Dan Kindlon &
Michael Thompson. Others may come to mind too, but these ones
are my favorites! Feel free to email me with any questions!
I highly recommend reading Steve Biddulph on raising boys. He
specialises in this field and his approach is characterised by
common sense rather than psychobabble. Details of his book can be
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