Therapist for Infertility and Pregnancy Loss
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Therapist for Infertility and Pregnancy Loss
I recently had to terminate a pregnancy at 19wks for a rare
chromosomal abnormality. It was a heartbreaking decision. Can
anyone recommend a good therapist in Oakland/Berkeley? I looked at
the old BPN recs, but nothing recent. My husband is not dealing
with this at all, and I need to find some outside support.
Gena McCarthy, MFT, is a wonderfully kind, supportive therapist who
specializes in issues around pregnancy loss and birth trauma, both
with individuals and couples. She also does a lot of work with
trauma and grief, including EMDR. She recently expanded her
practice into Lafayette. I've sent several clients to Gena who have
een very happy with her grounded approach. I know Gena would be
happy to speak with you and your husband to see if you are a good
match. She can be reached at 510-685-6827. Tara
I am so sorry for your loss. I highly recommend Diane Cote-Chang,
http://www.dianecotechang.com/ She's in San Francisco, but is a
block from the Montgomery BART station. She specializes in fertility
and pregnancy and works with individuals and couples.
My husband and I had to terminate a pregnancy because of a
chromosomal abnormality and Diane has been invaluable in helping us
deal with our loss.
Please feel free to contact me if you want more info (or just an
I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. I'd like to recommend a
couples counselor, she's very down to earth and practical, on Solano
Avenue, and has really helped us out Her name is Fran Wickner,
phone number 510-527-4011. She's a marriage and family therapist so
hopefully she can be helpful to you.
I am so very sorry for your loss. I, too, had to end a pregnancy
because of a fetal abnormality and it was one of the saddest,
loneliest times of my life. I worked with Lee Safran (who is an
MFT) and it was profoundly useful for me during that time. Her
number is 510 496-6096 and I know she has a website as well. She is
very experienced with pregnancy loss and helped me both practically
My husband and I also went once to a group at Alta Bates for
couples who had a genetic abnormality. That was helpful too. I
can't remember the name of the woman who ran the group, but you
could contact them, or ask Lee if you call her.
I am fortunate to have a healthy baby girl now - and wish you well
on your journey. Please try to remember that you will get through
this experience and take good care of yourself now.
In sympathy - from someone who has been there
Last year my husband and I lost our first pregnancy at 6 months.
We were devastated. We tried to get pregnant again as soon as they
said we could (a few months later) and had trouble with that as
well. Finally after trying for 9 months we are pregnant again and,
although I am overjoyed about being pregnant, I am also terrified.
My husband is very supportive and optimistic about this pregnancy.
However, I think that he is also scared but is having a difficult
time expressing his emotions and doesn't want to be upset around me
because he thinks it will make me feel worse.
So, my questions is, can anyone recommend a good couples counselor
who is familiar with grief counseling? I would specifically like
someone who is familiar with pregnancy loss but it's not a deal
breaker. We need someone who is compassionate but also to the
point. We saw someone right after our loss who was very touchy
feely and it just didn't work for us. My husband wanted to run out
of the room! We live on the east side of the tunnel and would
prefer someone in the walnut creek/pleasant hill area but would be
willing to travel for someone amazing.
thanks for your help
I wholeheartedly recommend to contact Mary Stein-Webber for you and
She is just the right combination of compassion, maturity, life
experience, a great listener, also great in finding what is really
the issue, great with leading you to where you want to be, gentle,
but not too touchy-feely.
Check out: http://safeplacetoheal.com/therapists.htm
The website says Christian Counseling. But I am not Christian or
into any other religion, and it does not matter at all. Mary is not
bringing this into play when her clients do not wish her to do so.
I have seen other therapists who weren't really working on the
issue, but more on the surface. Mary is very helpful, also and
especially with issues around pregnancy loss and trauma.
Best wishes for this pregnancy.
Melissa, I am so sorry for your loss and wish you the best with your
pregnancy. After trying for 2.5 years to conceive and then having to
terminate a pregnancy at almost 16 weeks, my husband and I were
directed to Diane Cote-Chang in San Francisco. She specializes in
fertility and pregnancy. We met with a few therapists before Diane,
but found that Diane understood what we were going through in a way
we didn't experience elsewhere. We're expecting any day now and we
have continued to see Diane through this pregnancy. Also, I wouldn't
describe her as touchy feely at all. Here is her website:
Please feel free to contact me if you want more info. I'll be
sending good thoughts your way. Jill
Dr. Donna Rothert specializes in just this type of thing,
and she's great. www.donnarothert.com
Good luck - .
I know of a good, seasoned therapist who may be a resource
for you. Her name is Jerolyn Peery Politzer. She provides
children, family and adult therapy in Lafayette. She is very
experienced with loss and grief issues and how loss can
impact a couple relationship. I understand that she may have
an opening in her practice. Call her to ask.
Jerolyn Peery Politzer
1043 Stuart St, #100
Lafayette, CA 925-588-9588
a supportive mom
I have a great recommendation for you; Maria Mishkind
Villela. She has a private practice in North Oakland. She
is an excellent therapist, isn't ''touchy-feely'', and is
quite skilled at engaging both sides in a couple, (even
husbands:). Maria is very ''real'' and I know that she has
experience in supporting people after pregnancy loss and
she's easy to talk with. I'm not sure if she has any
openings for new clients, but its certainly worth a call.
Her office is located on Piedmont Avenue, right on the other
side of the 24 tunnel. She may offer a sliding scale. Here's
her contact info.. she'll be happy to give you a consult on
the phone to see if you'd be a good match for free.
Maria Mishkind Villela
Community Family Therapy
Good luck with everything.
I am seeking a support group to deal with two prenatal losses which I
had suffered last year. I lost one pregnancy in week 13 and one in
week 8. The first loss involved a severe chromosomal abnormality,
diagnosed through CVS. We had to terminate that pregnancy. The second
loss was a blighted ovum, no heartbeat. I am just now awakening from
the trauma of these two events and am beginning the grieving process,
especially with regard to the pregnancy termination. I would like to
share my experience with women who have been in a similar situation.
My goal is to bring some closure around these losses and help me
clarify if I want to try for another pregnancy in the future.
If a support group of this nature already exists, I would like to
I had a miscarriage last year. Call the John Muir Women's
Health Center at (925) 941-7900. They have an evening drop-in
support group (away from the pregnant birth center classes)
that I found very helpful. No cost.
I am so sorry for both your losses and am glad for you that
you are engaging in the grieving process. If you don't know
about it yet, the Pregnancy & Birth Loss forum at
Mothering.com is wonderful. I know you are looking for a
group, but that forum might be a nice supplement. Here is the
with good wishes
I'm sorry about your losses. I am a colleague of Donna
Rothert's. She specializes in this area, and has a group as
well as offering individual and couple therapy.
She is part of http://www.perinatalpsychotherapy.com/ which
offers support for people who've had pregnancy loss.
It's great that you're reaching out for support!
Having terminated two pregnancies for medical/genetic reasons
I know where you are coming from. I highly reccomend a few
things. First there is an online group -- I know it sounds
odd, but its been tremendously supportive and I have met a
number of women in the bay area thru this list - google A
Heartbreaking Choice -- its a highly moderated listserve that
is wonderful. Sign up today, you won't regret it.
Oakland Genetics offers a group for women & their partners
who have terminated a wanted pregnancy - you don't have to be
a member of Kaiser to attend the group. Contact: Jeanne
Menary, Ed.D. (510) 845-4656 or Ann Bourguignon (510)
I have also heard great things about individual
counseling with Kim Kluger Bell (I think I have her name
right). I did not see her myself as I already had a
therapist. I did go on to have a healthy child but its been a
hard road and the support from other women who have been
through a medical termination of a wanted pregnancy have!
First off, I am so sorry for your losses. I had to end a
pregnancy last year at 19 weeks, and after attending a
variety of support groups, I highly recommend the Beyond
Choice group at Oakland Kaiser. This group is specifically
for parents who've made the mournful choice of ending a
pregnancy due to genetic or structural abnormalities, and I
found it the most helpful for me (over other groups for all
types of neonatal loss). the group is open to anyone...you
don't have to be a Kaiser member to attend. Contact Jeanne
Menary, Ed.D. at (510) 845-4656 for details. Good luck to you
on your journey.
try the free warm-line SOLACE where you can call in and speak
to someone: www.solace-southbay.org
Therapists focus on pregnancy:
Kaiser Oakland has run a group focused on termination of
pregnancy for genetic reasons. Some twelve years ago, it was
usually referred to as the ''support group'' and was open to
women and their partners, regardless of whether they were
Kaiser members. It was enormously helpful at the time. Two
facilitators alternated running the group. One was Dr.
Jeanne Menary who may still have a private practice locally.
All good thoughts for your healing.
Can anyone recommend a good therapist for inferility issues who
also would be considered in network for United Healthcare? I
would prefer Oakland or Berkeley if possible and someone who had
flexible hours (after work or weekends).
I highly, highly, highly recommend Kim Kluger-Bell, a
psychotherapist and MFT in private practice on Solano Avenue in
Berkeley. She is truly amazing and an incredible person to talk
to about infertility. I had many sessions with her and her
pervasive knowledge on the topic and her ease in which to allow
her patients to cry and laugh is incredible. I am not sure
about the insurance, but you can call her and ask, she is very
welcoming on the phone. She also wrote a book
titled ''Unforgettable Losses'' (you can find it on amazon.com I
believe) that I read and found to be very helpful. Her office
number is 510-524-1475. Good luck
I would love to get names of some therapists
(perferably in Oakland or Berkeley) who are good to talk to
about infertility and the difficulties I am having conceiving.
My heart goes out to you. I endured the suffering for 7 years. My thought is
that a really good therapist generally will be able to help. You can try Rose
Phelps 510-658-4344, she is great. I remember that talking to other people who
were going thru the same thing at the same time was often depressing; maybe
talking to someone who is finished with the process might help. I've never given
my info out before but if you want anyone to talk to, please email me.
Contact Donna Rothert, Ph.D. at (510)273-9548. She is part of Perinatal
Psychotherapy Services, a collective that specializes in infertility and other
issues surrounding pregnancy.
Gina Hassan is a psychologist in Berkeley who specializes in infertility and
pregnancy issues. She's smart, warm and has a lot of experience in working with
people through this experience. She's located on Shattuck near Cafe de la Paz.
I wanted to respond to the request for a therapist who
specializes in infertility/pregnancy issues. Sheila Longerbean,
MFT is a practices on Piedmont Avenue and works with these
issues. I've found her to be a very compassionate and caring
therapist. I believe her number is: 510-595-4664.
To find a therapist, you could check with Resolve (www.resolvenc.org).
I am in need of a therapist to deal with secondary infertility issues. I need someone
very smart and directive who can help me find tools to work with all the fears and
sorrows this journey toward a second child has raised. I've check the web but would
don't find much on the people my insurance covers. Does anyone have any
experience or information working with anyone
covered through United Behavioral Health? Thank you!
Peggy Orlin works at Pacific Fertility Clinic. If you just google
her name, you'll get to their site and read her impressive bio,
one which makes her sound well-suited to your needs. She
specializes in infertility issues. We saw her for one mandatory
meeting and liked her fine, but I honestly can't remember much
because we ended up working with a different clinic, and pretty
long ago at that. I'm sorry for your tough emotional time.
Walking down that infertility road was about the hardest thing I
(and we) have ever had to do. But I have to say, the demands of
that journey also deepened us as people. Good luck.
We have nothing but praise for Dr. Cary Littell who is on your list. We now have a
3 1/2 year relationship with her dealing with an extremely difficult situation and
cannot speak highly enough of her. She is insightful, compassionate and very
respectful and supportive.
I recommend Kim Kluger-Bell. She has a specialty in infertility-
related therapy. I don't know if she's covered by your insurance
(was not in your list) but you might check to see if she can be
added as a provider. Her office is on Solano. She's very focused
on developing action plans that CAN be implemented.
My doctor suggested that I might benefit from some therapy/
counselling to deal with a recent pregnancy loss and some other
issues. Have you had a good experience with
someone that you'd recommend? I couldn't find anything in
the archives on either person. Thank you.
I cant recommend Marilyn Wilts, PhD (233-1891) enough! She
helped me when I had a miscarriage and I found her to be
extremely sensitive, empathetic, and understanding of the
issues around pregnancy loss. She also supported me through my
next pregnancy (which resulted in my healthy happy son) and all
the fears that go along with being pregnant after a
miscarriage. Her office is on Solano Ave in Berkeley.
I am so sorry for you loss. I had a miscarriage a few years
back & it was a really tough time for me. I read many books on
the topic, saw a therapist & attended a support group for
My therapist's name is Kim Kluger-Bell. She is on Solano in
Berkeley & specializes in pregnancy loss. Her number is (510)
The group I went to was in Walnut Creek at the John Muir Women's
Health Center. It met twice monthly. There is also a group at
Best of luck to you,
Alta Bates has a support group that helped me tremendously called
SAND, Support After Neonatal Death. Members of the group included
those affected by miscarriage, still birth, and infant death. I
found to very helpful to be a part of a group therapy, where
everyone there had experienced a similar tragic loss. I think
Summitt Hospital might have a similar program.
We're looking for a licensed therapist (preferably in the
Oakland area) who can help us weigh the pros and cons of
adoption vs. donor eggs. Thanks for any recommendations.
I highly recommend Anne Bernstein who helped us with a similar
decision. Phone: 549-0598. Office: 2955 Shattuck near Ashby. She is
an incredibly skilled therapist with a great deal of experience working
with people on ''family-building choices'' and how children deal with
having ''unusual origins.''
My sister works at a fertility clinic in SF. I asked her if she
could recommend a therapist for your adoption/donor egg concerns
and this was her reply:
Her name is Peggy Orlin and she has a private practice in the
east bay (i think Oakland or Berkeley). Don't know her number but
she is listed.
They should also look at www.resolve.org; then link over to the NC
chapter. Hope this helps,
We used Dr. Ellie Schwartzman. Her office is on Piedmont Ave,
(510) 869-1339. She was recommended to us by Dr. Eldon
Schriock. She has gone through fertility treatments herself and
understands what you are going through. She helped us through
adoption vs. donor egg vs. no more kids. Friends of ours used
her as well and thought she was biased toward donor egg. We
didn't think so. I still go to her for general counseling.
I experienced a miscarriage in January and realize now that I
need help working through the grieving process. This has also
affected my relationship and I think I need some counseling in
that area as well. Can anyone recommend an experienced woman
therapist, preferably someone who takes Pacificare? I reviewed
previous postings but did not find anyone who was reviewed and
on my provider list.
Thank you very much.
To help you with your loss, I highly recommend Kim Kluger-Bell,
whose office is on Solano Avenue, 524-1475. I have no idea if
Kim takes Pacificare, but I do know she has worked with people
in the past to get on their insurance. Kim has written a
seminole book on pregnancy loss, called Unspeakable Losses. If
you can't get to see her, I at least highly recommend you read
her book. Of all the books available about miscarriage, I
consider hers the best. My husband and I were patients of Kim's
for a while to help us with relationship problems stemming from
multiple losses. We both enjoyed seeing her and found her to be
both compassionate and practical in her approach. I hope you can
manage to see Kim. I don't think you'll be disappointed.
Kim Kluger-Bell MFCC, is an excellent therapist who specializes
in helping women with fertility issues and miscarriage.
510-524-1475. She has written a helpful book, Unspeakable Losses,
Understanding the Experience of Pregnancy Loss, Miscarriage, and
Abortion. Her practice is in Albany on Solano Ave. I don't know
if she is on your list of providers, but she may be able to
recommend another therapist if you need it.
I received names of following counselors from my insurance company and
I would like to hear from people about them.
I occasionally feel that I wish I had a counselor that I could talk to about just daily life issues. I also have had infertility issue as well as pregnancy losses. I would like
a counselor who is especially sensitive to those issues related to pregnancy. Does anyone know if one of those counselors listed above may meet my need?
I have heard that Kim Kluger-Bell on Solano Avenue is quite skilled in this
area. She also has a book out called "Unspeakable Losses" -- I am sure you
can find it on Amazon. Best of luck.
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