Dissatisfied with Therapist
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Dissatisfied with Therapist
Anyone ever had a counselor make their life worse?
Is there any place to complain to?
I had a bad experience with a counselor calling me delusional
when I went in for counseling with my very argumentative and
abusive husband. We had big communications problems which then
got worse. Husband then started shouting that I was delusional
in front of kids. He says he won't talk to me unless there is
a ''licensed professional'' in the room. He is trying to kick me
out of the house and take the children.
My advice is, take the kids and leave.
I also was in an emotionally abusive relationship and although
our couples therapist was phenomenally competent
she simply did not believe me. Since my partner was wonderfully
loving 95% of the time, and very believable, I just felt crazier
& crazier as time went on. Thank god I decided to end the
relationship, and now, 10 months later,I am just beginning to
Read Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them
I couldn't tell by your post how your therapist was incompetent,
but I wanted to comment on your husband trying to kick you out
of the house and take the kids. In California, it would be very
difficult for him to do that. The courts usually puts the
children with the mother, unless she is a unfit parent, and the
burden of proof is with the accuser. You might want to contact
the Alameda County Family Court Facilitators to get more
information about your rights. Their number is (510) 208-4969.
I am a psychotherapist and I am sorry that you were not treated
with respect, and that your husband took your therapist's lead
and is now being verbally abusive. When you ask if there is a
place where you can complain, are you looking to file a formal
complaint against your therapist, or are you seeking mediation or
another type of support? There are consumer boards where you can
file a complaint against your therapist. I would be happy to
email you the information about where to register your
complaints, or I can give you some ideas about finding a more
respectful therapist and getting some resoltion in your current
Feel free to email me.
The place to go to report incompetency is the Board of
Behavioral Science Examiners in Sacramento (can find them online
via a Google search). Check to see what kind of a therapist
this person is (MFT, LCSW, Licensed Psychologist, Psychiatrist,
Pastoral Counselor). The first two can be reported to the BBSE,
but the others have their own Boards. Make your report in
writing (send it certified mail and keep the receipt), so you
have a paper trail. Then consult an attorney so you can turn
your scared into strength and smartness on how to deal
effectively with this difficult situation. My best.
Most health care professionals are regulated by a particular
state board. If your counselor is a psychologist, you can
complain to the CA Board of Psychology at
http://www.psychboard.ca.gov/enforce/complaints.html. If it's a
Licensed Marriage, family & child Therapist, complain to the
Board of Behavioral Sciences at http://www.bbs.ca.gov/comp-1.htm.
Best of luck.
I'm not a therapist, but have had some relevant experience. You
could try another therapist, but be upfront about the facts and
history. It's possible that you haven't heard your therapist
correctly, or that you may have a problem that you can't accept.
Few if any licensed therapists would tell you such a thing
without a full explanation of what they mean, and they would do
itin a constructive way. I've had experience with a partner who
resisted the truth that the therapist tactfully but clearly and
accurately stated - that's not uncommon, and more likely the
issue than your therapist being incompetent. Blaming the
therapist is a symptom of a fundamental problem. Putting words
in the therapist's mouth is also something I've seen, and you
should assess whether the problem is really yours or the
therapist's. I'd recommend Vickie Van Winkle in Berkeley, she's
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