Berkeley Parents Network: Children Sleeping in the Car

Berkeley Parents Network

Children Sleeping in the Car

Berkeley Parents Network > Reviews > Services & Businesses > Autos > Children Sleeping in the Car

OK to run quick errands while children sleep in the car?

Sept 2006

I'm not sure I'm looking for advice so much as wanting to hear other opinions and the reasons behind them. My kids fall asleep in the car often, usually they nap at home but sometimes they fall asleep while we're running errands. I often will leave them sleeping and do quick erreands or check on them every 10 minutes (I watch the clock). I don't do this on hot days, I always put up a sunblocking visor in the windsheild and of course, I lock the doors. The windows are tinted so the kids aren't visible unless you are looking right in with your hands cupped around your eyes.

The reason I'm asking is that my husband did this once a long time ago with our son in a non-tinted car and somone saw and reproached him (my husband) when he returned saying he was about to call the police. Since then, my husband hasn't done it. Seems like a wide divergence of opinions out there. And what's the alternative when my 3 year old declines so nap with my 1 and half year old and then falls asleep as soon as we leave the house in the afternoon? Do you wake your tired cranky kids and drag them into to store with you? Do you simply return home and not get stuff done? multi-tasker with nappers

I would try running the errands in the morning when the kids are awake and probably much more cooperative. Leaving kids in the car for ten minutes at a time is a bad idea for a lot of reasons. I doubt that social services would think too highly of the practice -wouldn't do it

In my opinion you should never leave your children in the car, even for a short amount of time. There are alot of things inconvenient things that we have to do as parents because we ARE parents and so we do it. The day doesn't actually have to be that warm outside for the temp to rise to an unsafe level in the car - esp. if you're not letting any air in and the windows are tinted. And what if, for some reason, your short errand turns out to take longer? Why risk it. If you want your children to nap, find a shady place and pull over and stay in the car until they wake up. Jen

My oldest child had a hard time napping and so we would go on special driving loops to get him to fall asleep. I would either leave him in the car in our driveway, in our garage, or transfer him back into the house. I would never, ever leave him in a parking lot (if that is what you are suggesting). Besides, it is now against the law:

California Vehicle Code 15620

(a) A parent, legal guardian, or other person responsible for a child who is 6 years of age or younger may not leave that child inside a motor vehicle without being subject to the supervision of a person who is 12 years of age or older, under either of the following circumstances: (1) Where there are conditions that present a significant risk to the child's health or safety. (2) When the vehicle's engine is running or the vehicle's keys are in the ignition, or both.

It is referred to Kaitlyn's Law. I would imagine that getting caught would result in a fine, no matter what the mitigating circumstances are.

In my experience, when I would have a kid fall asleep in the car on the way to an errand, I would either give up on the errand or wait in the car until he/she woke up. I know it is a total drag when this happens, and I feel for you. We have all been there. But I personally would not feel safe leaving my kids in the car alone unattended Anon

Not a good idea! Children have been both kidnapped (sometimes the kidnapper is initially unaware that there is a child in the car!) and have been injured by heat, etc. (even when the temperature is not particularly hot). It may also be illegal, since several recent highly-publicized cases where children died as a result of this behavior. I would strongly advise against it. Wake the child up and take him/her with you when you go into the stores Robert A. Fink, M. D.

This is not advice or an opinion. Simply fact. It is illegal to leave your child(ren) alone in a car until they reach the age of eight (8). Before that, it is considered (by the police specifically, but by other parents I am sure) to be child abandonement. A lot can happen in 2 minutes, let alone 10 I'd call the police too

Parked cars get pretty hot, even if the ambient temperature is not that hot, unless there is air circulation thru windows (it's the greenhouse effect). In any case, I personally feel really uncomfortable leaving my kids alone in the car for any amount of time (altho I confess I occasionally do when I am loading both kids into the car by myself and have to chase one around the house, or unloading groceries)... I do understand your dilemma though-- it's really frustrating to get them to nap at the same time, or at all. What I have done with my two kids (now 4 and 1.5) is plan for them to fall asleep in the car and bring along paperwork, magazines, correspondence, my journal, or a good book. Once they are both asleep, I find a shady spot on a residential street, park the car, open the windows for a breeze, lean my seat back a bit, and enjoy some down time. Sometimes I listen to the radio and it doesn't seem to wake them. I started this when our house was undergoing renovations and napping at home became impossible, but I ended up continuing after the renovations bcs it was a strategy for getting them to nap simultaneously. I usually got at least an hour and a half of quiet time this way. good luck. mother of two

I would never leave my children in a car unattended. One time, when I parked my car in front of El Cerrito Libray, just to drop off some borrowed books to a library post by the wall, I left them in a car, with a car still running (because they were listening to a story on tape), and ran to a post. It was probably only for 10 to 15 seconds, but during that time, I saw one car parking just in front of mine, and a driver was just about to come out, only to depart very quickly afer he saw me coming right back to a car. I cannot stop wondering what he was thinking of doing to my stuff, and to my kids,,,. Since then, I never leave my children even for a short time (except in front of Norge Cleaner in El Cerrito, since I can park right in front of them, away from foot traffic, and I can see my children all the time when picking up my laundry.)

If your child tend to sleep in a car when you want to run errands, do you think you can bring a branket, and let kids even sleep in a shopping cart? Once when I was with my 3 years old son, he fell asleep. He is a kind of boy who never wakes up once he falls asleep. I just laid my jacket inside a shopping cart, and let him sleep there while I did minimal shopping, using a space underneath the cart.

Do you think you can ask your husband to pick up something on the way from his work? I would rather live with inconvenience of not being able to get what I plan to get (due to my children falling asleep in a car). I would regret it so much if anything happens to my children while I was away, just because I wanted to get milk or something Mom of two boys

i can never understand when people leave their kids in the car even only for a few minutes. kids are the most adaptable creatures on the earth. i say so what if our kids are tired and napping . . . . . . get up and out of the car. they will cry and whine, oh well that's what kids do. i'm not judging you or anyone elses parenting style, just don't take a chance! better to be safe than sorry better safe than sorry

I don't think you should ever leave your kid alone in the car. Ever. If mine fall asleep during errands, I wake them up and do what I gotta do. If they are really cranky, then I go home. But, mostly it works out and I get what I need to do done. And, yes, it means sometimes they don't get their afternoon nap if they futzed around when they were supposed to be napping. anon

I wouldn't do it, because although you're taking precautions against hot weather, what if something crazy went on with your car, like it caught fire for some weird electrical reason, or really, what if someone took your car or kids? Or what if your 3-year old woke and panicked or started playing around with gears? It only takes a few seconds for something tragic to happen. It's not worth getting your errands done marisa

If I saw children of that age alone in the car I would call the police. There are too many dangerous people out there and a lot could happen in 10 minutes. Our neighbors' son would only nap after a drive in the car. They took him around the block, parked in the driveway and left the son there. One of them sat outside with him while he slept. I understand your frustration. But it's the safety of your children and that's just what comes with having kids Anon

Hi there, I know you are asking for advice so I will try to keep from sounding rude... I also have two children who only nap in the car. But I have NEVER left them unattended, even for a second. Not only is it dangerous, someone could take them or worse, hit your car - it also is against the law. I personally know of a woman for was hauled off to jail for doing just that. I have also spoken to people who I have seen leave their kids in the car and also have called the police and waited for them to arrive. God forbid they wake up and you are gone. Can you imagine the fear and panic they may feel?? PLEASE do not continue to do that. PLEASE bring a magazine, your bills, call a friend, SOMETHING besides doing what you need to get done. I know it is hard when you have a million things to do and you are desperate for them to sleep but when you have kids, your needs don't come first. You either have to decide if you want to get your errands done or have your children well rested. The police consider that child abandonment and it is a serious crime. For the safely of your children and your own freedom, please don't continue to leave your children unattended. anon

I would never take the risk of leaving my children unattended in a car. There are too many potentially dangerous outcomes. What if your car was hit while parked? What if someone undesireable saw you leave your children in the car? What if something unexpected happened to you, and no one else knew where your children were? What if your children woke up and decided to exit the car? Or drive the car? I would trade a cranky child over each of these alternative outcomes Better Safe than Sorry

Unless we're parked at home and I'm carrying groceries in the house, I never, ever leave my child alone in the car. Ever.

We've made it a real priority to make sure our daughter has consistent nap times, and so car naps are a distant memory. If your kids are falling asleep in the car constantly, then you need to look hard at their nap routines, establish consistent nap times, and schedule errands around those times. I can imagine with two kids it's harder. I empathize. But it is imperative that you keep your children with you at all times, no matter how inconvenient, no matter how little you get done. There's no errand worth possibly losing your kids to a kidnapper or who knows what. Inconvenienced but Safe

Dear Multi-Tasker: Here is the one and only question to ask: If your car was stolen and your children kidnapped while you were shopping, would you thank your lucky stars that you at least hadn't had to wake up a sleepy, now cranky child?

Yes, when my children (ages 2 & 3 1/2) fall asleep in the car, I either turn around and go home to let them sleep at home and save the errands for later. Or, if the errands are essential, I put them in the stroller and take them, whether cranky or asleep, into the store WITH ME. If I've forgotten a stroller, I have the least-sleepy one walk and carry the other one, or I go home and get the stroller.

OUR CHILDREN ARE TOO PRECIOUS TO TAKE SAFETY CHANCES WITH IN THIS VIOLENT AGE. Ever look at the back of a milk carton? The parents of some of those kids may have taken chances like this one, and they regret it every second of every day.

I understand your eagerness to get things done. I, too, don't have enough hours in my day. But our children's well-being comes high above any daily to-do list.

Abundant blessings to you and your family. No ill will intended, only loving concern. Sincerely, a fellow Bay Area mom

Whoa. I think it's a really bad idea to leave your children in a locked car, alone, while sleeping. It only takes 3 seconds to break a car window....what if your children were kidnapped? I am not perfect, though. I have left my son in the car sleeping while I go to the ATM, but only when the special ATM spot is open right in front of the machine. If it's not, I just keep on driving. But I feel your frustration, too. Typically after my son's nap, we run errands. But when he refuses to take a nap, my schedule is off, and my errands don't get done. But, I try to think of what I would feel like if I came back to the car and he was gone. I would kill myself---and the guilt of just that knowledge stops me from leaving him alone.

So, yes, your errands don't get done. If he won't take a nap, drive around the block and then park in your driveway and read a book, or take a nap yourself. Or, yes, wake them up and take them with you. Or, do your errands at a different time Just don't leave them alone!

I have a feeling you will hear lots back on your post. Both my husband and I read it, and while we can appreciate wanting to get stuff done, we both felt strongly that you are putting your children at risk. Even on a medium sunny day, the interior of a car can rise dramatically in a short time - 5min. or less. I can understand someone saying they were ready to call the police...it is not legal to leave your children in a car unattended. The other day, I put one in a stroller and the other in a hip hammock, both asleep out of the car...just to get one small errand done. Perhaps you could look into establishing swapping kids with a friend on a regular basis to get stuff done - or hire a mother's helper who can be trusted to stay with kids while you run quick errands. It's got to be less expensive than the chance of them ever becoming hurt, etc...I have no doubt that you love your children dearly...I'm sure you would agree that they are worth more than any errand you could get done. I sincerely hope you stop leaving them...it's not safe and downright dangerous Jennifer

I think you are underestimating the risk to leaving an unattended child. Inconvenience and cranky kids don't seem enough of an excuse to stop being responsible for your young children's safety. I even took my child out of the car to go in and pay for gas after pumping (it sometimes tok longer than the expected minute or two)! Especially if you can't actively see the child (which, as you say, is difficult through tinted windows), you are putting that child in danger. And even with tinted windows, and even in relatively mild temperatures, a closed car can get very hot.(See http://ggweather.com/heat/). Another issue is that if the child wakes and finds you gone, even 10 minutes can seem like an eternity to her. And what if you are delayed? Or lose track of time? or get hit by a car in the parking lot? Whoever helps you won't know you've left children in the car. Aside form your personal comfort level, it is probably illegal, depending on the definition of ''significant risk''. From the DMV website:

UNATTENDED CHILDREN IN MOTOR VEHICLES

It is illegal to leave a child six years of age or younger unattended in a motor vehicle when:

* There are conditions that present a significant risk to the child's health or safety. Example: Leaving a child in a closed car on a very hot day.

* The vehicle's engine is running, the keys are in the ignition, or both. Children can start or move the car causing injuries and/or deaths to themselves or others.

Exception: The child may be left under the supervision of a person 12 years of age or older.

The court may fine violators and require the person to attend a community education program.

Also, the penalties for leaving an unattended child in a vehicle are more severe if the child is injured, requires emergency medical services, or dies Better safe...

I'm sure this is one of five thousand negative replies you'll get on this but a friend was nearly arrested by the police when she left her twins in the car and ran into work to get her paycheck. BPN reader

The safety of your child should be your number 1 priority, not disturbing him while he is napping in the car. If you must run the errand, please please please get him out of the car. Otherwise take care of them later when he is either awake or at home with someone watching him. If something happened to him while you were away from the car could you ever forgive yourself? anon

Hi, As far as I'm concerned the main reason why you should not do it is because something might happen to you while you are out running errands. Then what would happen to your child? What if you lost your keys? What if you were run over by another car in the parking lot? What if you just plain forgot (it has happened before)? It is also illegal. I say, if your child falls asleep, go back home, let him sleep in the car with the door open while you play outside next to him with your other children or read if you only have one. Errands can always wait m

My basic rule is that if I can see them and/or the car, then it is okay to leave them in the car sleeping. I keep them in view the whole time (or try to).I bring them into the store if they are awake. One of my kids is an 'explorer' and he is often safer in the car then running away from me in whatever store/situation I am in. My exception to this is in our driveway- I will let them sleep there and check every 15 minutes (not on a hot day of course). anon

I would never, ever, ever leave a child unattended in a car. Okay, two exceptions: First, the car is in my own driveway, the child is buckled in, and I forgot something in the house -- I'll run, and I mean literally run, inside to get whatever it is and run back. Second, I'm parked at a bank, fewer than 50 feet and within direct line of sight from an ATM I want to use, and my child is asleep -- I'll go get my cash without unbuckling the kid. Glancing over my shoulder the whole time.

Ten minutes is way too long, and going anywhere you can't see your child is way too far. There are just too many things that could go wrong, and far too many ways that ten minutes could turn into twenty, thirty or more.

But honestly, I never found this to be too restrictive. My children both napped ''on the go'' plenty (my toddler still does sometimes), but I use slings and back carriers and/or strollers to allow the kid to sleep while I do errands on foot, and I use services that allow me to do my errands without leaving the car (the ATM scenario above happens only when there isn't a functioning drive-up ATM within reasonable reach). I pay for gas at the pump. On those occasions when a car-induced nap is a desirable thing, I bring a book along, drive to my destination, and then stay in the car, reading, until the child wakes up, whereupon we proceed together to do the errand.

My elder child has outgrown naps; the younger is now at a stage where she does indeed sleep better on a bed in a quiet room than she does in a mei tai or Ergo on my back, and I do miss the infant days when she could easily sleep anytime, anywhere. But it's not that hard to plan around naptime, and it's not that hard to get at least SOME naptime in even on days when we've got to be out and about after lunch. Either is much better, I think, than taking the risk of leaving my child unsupervised and unprotected in a big dangerous hunk of metal, glass and flammables. Maybe that sounds extreme, but I think cars are extremely dangerous, and I don't want to mess around. Better safe than sorry They're Not Allowed To Play In There, Either

Wow. You're going to hear from a lot of people about how dangerous it could be to leave a 1 year old and 3 year old in the car. Personally, I would never risk it. My 3 year old rarely naps with my 1 year old, so if I need to do car errands, we go after breakfast, do errands and something fun and then drive home at the 1 year old's nap time. I carry whichever one falls asleep into the house to finish his nap. Sometimes I get lucky and they both fall asleep. I don't go on afternoon errands if one or the other hasn't napped - unless I really, really have to, and even then if one falls asleep in the car on the way, I really do simply return home and not get stuff done. Questions to ask yourself: would you do it if people could see the kids inside? Are you comfortable knowing no one would see through the tinted glass that they are in trouble? Sometimes I have to do things later

This is a challenge! I no longer live in the Bay Area. We are in NC. NC has a law that you cannot leave a child unattended in a car for more than 1 minute. You may want to check and see if there is such a law where you live. For many reasons, I would not do it. Not only is there the risk of someone breaking into your car--have you seen how quickly criminals are able to do this?--but there is the risk of your car getting hit or your older child unbuckling and getting out of the car or messing with the brakes, etc. and causing the car to move. As a child, my grandmother left me in the car for a few minutes while she ran into the post office. I was climbing around in the car, knocked the emergency brake, and the car rolled backwards down a hill into traffic. Scary.

What I have done with my two is that I always have a book in the car, for myself and the kiddos. If one falls asleep, I sit and read for 30 min., giving them a bit of a nap, then I rouse them and we do errands. If the older one is in the car and it's the little one who has fallen asleep, the two of us read together for 30 min. I actually often enjoy the gift of some downtime to read Anon.

It is illegal to leave your children in the car unattended anon

I Really don't think it is a good idea to have your kids stay in the car napping while you do errands even for 2 minutes or at all. Not only will you risk having your children taken away from you by child services, but they easily can be abducted by someone who is WATCHING you as you run off to do your quick errand. Something could happen to your car as well while they are in there, they could wake and become terrified, it could be wrecked into ( I saw a driver wreck inot a parked car just the other day ) Totally a bad idea in every way. Sure it is frustrating not to be able to accomplish tasks that you would like during the day, but you will not be able to live with yourself if something happens. Please reconsider your actions and hire a sitter to come with you to stay in the car if you need to. Or do you errands when you know the kids will be awake. very concerned mom

Do not do this! Your children are at risk (anything from a car- break-in kidnapping to another car crashing into your parked car to waking up & feeling abandoned by mom) and you are subjecting yourself to possible criminal liability and/or a child protective services investigation. You need to find another solution, sorry.

I'm not sure what you mean when you say you do ''quick errands'' while your kids are sleeping alone in the locked car but this is unsafe and illegal. I know how it is to have a huge list of things to do but if my kids are tired, I avoid driving anywhere if I don't want them to fall asleep in the car. If they do doze off, I go home, or park and read a book, or wake them when we get to our destination. Please don't leave your kids unattended in the car, awake or not. The negative consequences are too great for the risk you're taking. I'm surprised you continue to do this even after someone approached your husband about it. If law enforcement were to get involved while your kids were unattended in the car, you could get a warning, a ticket, or arrested for child endangerment. You would also have to deal with Child Protective Services. Of worse consequence would be if your children were to wake up and become frightened, let themselves out of the car, or if a stranger were to come and abduct them --CPS Social Worker

I would never leave my son alone napping in a car for longer than, say, dropping something off in a corner mailbox. And I'm a person who HAS left my son sleeping in a hotel room while I eat lunch in the hotel restaurant. This is just a gut reaction, but when I think about it there really is a difference between these situations

When I left my son sleeping in the hotel room, the restaurant was on the same floor and I had a baby monitor with me. I also told MANY members of the hotel staff that my son was asleep and that we were listening in on the baby monitor. If he was in some sort of distress I would be able to respond just as quickly as if I was at home, plus everybody knew what the situation was so if something happened to me (for example, if I choked on a sandwich) everybody would know there was a baby alone in the room that needed to be looked after.

If you are leaving your kids alone in a car, it is illegal so you can't enlist the help of the folks around you. If passersby have NO idea that there are kids in the car, they are not going to know that those kids will need help if something happens to you. Also, it doesn't sound like you have a way to continuously monitor them. If you are gone for 10 minutes and somebody rams into your car...your kids could be distressed and it could take you 10 minutes to respond. Finally, it is illegal so if somebody does find your kids alone in the car you could face legal trouble. I've heard of kids being removed from their parents custody for less, all it takes is one very ambitious social worker. anon

I had the fortune to have a garage, and I would pull the car in, set up the baby monitor and add blankets or fans or whatever. I always wonder what people w/o garages do. When we have had no room in the garage (and therefore no garage) I've just brought a book along and parked under a shady tree somewhere and even taken a nap. I wouldn't feel comfortable leaving the baby in the car out in front alone, either because something could happen and I'd feel awful or someone would call the police. I sometimes even wondered about leaving her in the garage. As your kids get older the naps aren't goign to be as long anyway, and if you're checking every 10 min you're not really getting much done, so why not just think of it as your special reading time?

You will get 500 responses from people telling you that your children could be kidnapped and it's not worth the risk. The truth is, there are LOTS of us who do this. I wanted to chime in on the ''go ahead'' side. Realistically, there is a FAR, FAR better chance that your children will die in a car crash-- kidnapping are so extremely rare--much more rare than the media would have you believe. If you place value in statistics, we shouldn't drive with our children at all--yet we do anyway. With the precautions you mentioned (such as the locked car) common sense says it's okay...but we're getting conditioned out of using our common sense by the media. Yes, most people do this sometimes, for the logical reasons you mentioned. Try not to listen to the doomsayers. Sensible

To napping kids in car- Just think of how awful your life would be if anything -and I do mean anything -happened to your kids while they were in the car and you were not- really sit with that and get the answer you need. Ultimatley, there is nothing that needs to be done that would merit your kids safety, well being, lives, your abilty to keep them (if you are found to be neglectful)

As I said to a driver who was rushing me as I walked across the street with my 2 kids:'' Is 30 seconds of your time more important than my childrens' lives?' Let the errands go, or have a cranky kid. Stop believing that you have to and are supposed to have it all done...live realistically. and don't leave your little ones alone in the car anon

Hi- My husband has spoken to moms and dads several times about the dangers of letting kids sleep in cars while parents run around. While I have never had the courage to go and tell another parent what is what, my husband is very passionate on the topic and I must say, I agree. Even with dark windows, cars can be stolen. Also, what if you are delayed returning to your car? How frightening would it be for your child to wake up, alone in a car? Then, strangers would here a hysterical child and call authorities or break in to calm your child.

Really, there is no single reason that anyone should leave a child -- or pet for that matter -- in a car unattended. If your child falls alseep, then go for a leisurely drive and enjoy the views. That is what we do. Or, go home. A trip to the cleaners can wait until everyone is rested concerned mommy

I'm sure you'll get a flood of responses, but somehow I feel compelled to respond anyway.

It is extremely dangerous to leave your children unattended in a car! Overheating is not the only danger (although that can happen surprisingly quickly, on a not very hot day) -- your kids, especially your 3 year old, could wake up while you're gone, figure out how to get out of his car seat, and by the time you get back, could be wandering down the street (10 minutes is a loooooong time to leave a child unattended!). He doesn't know how to get out of the restraint yet? Maybe not yet, but he will eventually learn, and at the most inopportune moment.

Even if your kids can't get out of their car seats, if they wake up and you're not there, they could become extremely upset. Those dark windows of yours won't stop anyone from calling the police if they hear a screaming kid inside of your car.

Yes, you should take your cranky kids into the store with you, or ''get stuff done'' at some other time. It is essential for your children's safety that you do so! -- Appalled that you would even ask

You are going to get a serious tongue lashing with this posting. Please don't leave your kids in the car while you run errands. A LOT can happen during those 10 minute intervals. Quit while you're ahead - for your kids' sake. Forget the alternatives and think about the consequences. anon

Take a stroller and do errands within walking distance, or shop by internet as much as possible. We even used Webvan, back in the day when they were actually a business. If I see a little child unattended in a locked car with the windows rolled up, I will call the police. End of story. Sorry if I sound harsh and maybe they do it the way you do it in other parts of the world but not here My two cents

I know that the car napping is a hard one to deal with and the temptation to leave a child napping in a car is strong. But I think it's not a good idea at all in a public place. Even for 10 minutes seems risky to me. The child could wake up a minute or two after you leave and be crying and alone for the rest of the time, someone could hit the car in the parking lot and you wouldn't know, your child could get tangled in the carseat or some other unforseen circumstance. Even with the tinted windows, it also seems risky--someone could break a window and get to your child if they really wanted to. I also think that it's against the law to leave a child in the car, so you could very easily get reported to child protective services. I think if you're in full sight of the car for a minute or two--to drop off a book in an outdoor book drop, that might be okay. At home in the driveway, I'll leave my son in the car while I'm bringing in groceries, but then I stay out in the yard or on the porch while he finishes his nap.

As hard as it is, I usually cut my errands short or wake up my son if he's sleeping and I need to go into a store. I try to time errands before or after likely nap times, but that doesn't always work. I don't have a good solution, just a strong feeling that leaving any child in the car isn't a good idea. Sympathetic but concerned mom

It's illegal to leave your kids unattended in the car. Anything can happen to them. Don't do it! Wake them up and bring them in the store, or go to stores at a time when they are least likely to want to sleep, like in the morning. Not convenient, but you don't want anything to happen to your kids! Anon

I wouldn't do it. If anything, I would rather leave an awake child, preferably older than three, in the car, than a sleeping one. There have been several cases where a car was stolen with a sleeping child in it (one right in front of Cafe Roma on College Ave--ok she left the car running, but still). Or god forbid, an actual kidnapper. Somebody watching you would know you had kids in there, even with your tinted windows. That said, I will go to the ATM or pay for gas with the car in eyeshot. As for what to do, I'd take the kids out, shop quickly, and let them fall back asleep on the way home, at which point they can sleep to their heart's content in the garage. Sounds risky to me.

I don't want to sound preachy but I would never leave my little ones unattended in the car and I always worry when I see other children alone. Maybe my imagination just gets away from me but it only takes a moment for something awful to happen, the least of which might be that they wake up and get scared about being alone. (I REALLY worry when I see child crying and alone in a car). There is also a state law that creates liability for parents who leave their children under 6 unattended in a car under certain circumstances. My reaction might be to call the police as might be the reaction of others who were concerned. anon

i think it's not ok to leave your child in the car, what if something happened to you or what happens when the child wakes up and find's them self alone in a car. if you want to sit in the car while the child sleeps, maybe read a book or bring in your lap top computer it's ok. but alone is weird. don't be so lazy! pick your child up and bring them inside. it worked for us, after they got used to it maybe 4 months. you have to train your child, you are the parent this is your job. even my new baby who is 5 months now i can pick him up and bring him inside to sleep. if they wake up maybe they rested and ready to play again. good luck, please take your kid out of the car. the bed is amuch more comfortable or even the couch concerned parent

I'm sure you'll get an earful on this one. Actually, I don't think there is wide divergence of opinion on this issue: most people firmly believe you mustn't leave kids alone in the car. What if someone tried to steal your car while you were away for ''just a few minutes''? Sorry, but no errand is that important. Hate to say it, but your husband is right and you are wrong. Yes, every time you do this you are running the risk of someone calling the police, and yes, you could end up with Child Protective Services invading your life. If you are out running errands and your kids fall asleep for a much-needed nap, your options include: waking them and dealing with their bad moods; parking and listening to the radio or reading (we leave magazines in the car for this purpose) or taking a nap yourself until they wake up or you've had enough; picking the farthest destination you can drive to so they get some sleep in , then waking them when you get there; or returning home. I'm sure you're trying to be efficient and get done all that stuff that needs to get get done, but please, consider re-ordering your priorities and slowing down a little

Oh boy, can't wait to see how the Mom Police respond to this one! I think you need to use good judgement. If you're going to be in a store for half an hour, it seems like you should probably wake your children and bring them with you (unless there's someone else to stay with them in the car. If you're popping into the cleaners for two minutes, leave 'em in the car. anon

You can't just leave the kid in a locked car! Besides the legal and safety ramifications, what if the kid wakes up and mommy is not there, how scary. I have two little ones and if I have to run errands with them I try to bring my teen sitter with me. If it's just me, I will either wake one up, wait it out in the car, keep driving, or go home, depending on the situation, but I would never leave one in the car Cautiously Yours

You have my sympathy. I also have a child who falls asleep easily in the car. She is not easy to wake either and not easy to pull out of the car to finish an errand once she has fallen asleep. I have spent a lot of time sitting in the car while she naps. Sometimes that is very frustrating, sometimes it is refreshing and a quiet time for me to read a book or just think. I have spent several years planning my errands around the possibility I will be stranded by a nap.

I want to encourage you to do that too. I'm concerned that you may not realize how close you are to losing all that you value about your life. A criminal conviction and time spent in prison will forever change you. It may not feel like child endangerment to you but it may look like that to others with power over you. And what if something bad actually did happen to your kid while in the car alone?

I strongly encourage you to reflect on your needs and try to get them met in some other way. Can you get some additional outside help to care for your kid while you run some errands? Can you bring someone with you who will wait in the car with your kid? Can you pratice doing without the errand that gets interrupted by the nap? Maybe if you think carefully about how to honor your needs you can come up with some creative solutions that keep your napper safe too.

mom of another car napper

I believe the offical law is that you cannot leave them ''unanttended'' for more than 30 seconds. Don't know how ''unattended is defined''. If you are going to do this, you should educate yourself as to the exact law. Call Bananas, Inc. to see if they can tell you exactly what the law says. What I do is I run the most errands I can while they are in another adult's care (day care, pre school, school, afterschool). If other adult care is not avilable, and they fall asleep on the way to an errand and I have time to spare, I park where it is shady and read a book or take a nap or just listen to the radio for 30 minutes or more. If I need to get the errand done and they are with me, then I take those cranky little tykes in with me and count on others' understanding. If I am on my way home and they fall asleep, I park in the shade at my house and I garden in the front yard or read a book on the front step. If you think haveing tinted windows keeps would-be kidnappers from taking your children, you may be right...but car theives may still take your car - without realizing the kids are in there. I think I heard a storey about how a kid was tossed form a car after the theif figured out the kid was in there. Don't think the kid was severely hurt physically, but ...YIKES! Another thing to consider is do you want your 3 yr old to have that image in their brain of you being in trouble with that police officer? And what if the police took you in (in cuffs?) and took the kids away? What image would then sink into your kid's head. So in summary I'd say - don't do it when you are out and about in town, and use caution when you are at home. Their safety and mental health is more important than their good nap Signed - a Mom Who is Understanding of Grumpy Sleepy Kids and their Parents.

I did leave my children napping occasionally when they were little and it was never a problem--it was usually to run in and return a video (by dropping it just inside the door slot), unload groceries (we live on a quiet street in a nice neighborhood) or perhaps to chat with a neighbor while I was standing near the car.

Since both my kids are now grown up, it's unfortunate to read so many strident posts from parents who would have called the police on me.

If the cops weren't so busy responding to every 9-1-1 call from some nosy parker reporting a mom who ran into the dry cleaners, maybe they could be out catching bad guys.

Follow your own instincts as a parent--I assume you are thoughtful and attentive or you wouldn't have posted the question-- anon

I read the many messages about car naps and while I agree with all the posts saying don't do it I wanted to add a different spin to the situation.

You have 2 kids. Life can be crazy. When they both fall asleep in the car, stop and listen to the lovely silence and look at your beautiful babies. Then take 15 minutes for yourself while they sleep. Keep a good book in the car, a favorite magazine, soduko puzzles, crosswords, a nail file and some polish. Think of the nap in the car as time for YOU. I always felt 15 minute naps for my kids were great at taking the edge off and not leaving them too cranky. I let them know when we get in the car that I will wake them up when we get to our destination so they are not surprised by being hauled into Safeway half asleep. Build an extra 15 min into your errand schedule and enjoy the down time in the car with them!
Been there and read a book!

You got an earful last week from people who didn't think you should leave your kid in the car. I just wanted to express that I totally sympathize with your situation. There was a period of time last year when my then 1-year-old would nap ONLY in the car, and I really felt so trapped and bored to sit with him all the time. Then I developed a list of things I could do while in the car with him, and I always saved those errands for naptime. It made me feel much more productive. Here is my list:

- Drive-thru ATM (like the Wells Fargo in EC Plaza)
- Get car washed (like at the gas station drive thru)
- Get gas
- Vacuum out car
- Get oil changed, smog test
- Get fast food (not the healthiest but at least I could eat it w/o my kids 
knowing!)
- Get coffee (the Starbucks in the parking lot of the El Cerrito Home Depot has a 
drive-thru)
- Go to pharmacy (a few have drive-thrus)
- Take mail to mailbox
- Errands as others have mentioned where you can park in front and see the kid 
the whole time - books to library, videos to video store, rent to landlord, dry 
cleaning

Finally, as other people suggested you can pack your diaper bag with paperwork, bills, magazines, a laptop if you have one, and find a shady place to park. I also would frequently park in my own driveway and briefly dash in to get myself a soda, a book, etc.

I bet others have their lists of ''driving errands'' and can add to this. Hopes this makes you feel better about losing productive time to naps! Been there

I used a Sit-n-Stroll long past its reccomended weight/age specs because of sleepy kids in the car. It is a car seat, not the fanciest, but comfortable & light. Then, if your child is asleep, you just unstrap the seat belt & slide it over, hoist it up (child is still strapped into it) and snap the levers into place that make it a stroller. They rarely wake up & if they do snooze off...it never makes them yell because they can feel/smell you there. You can get it on line from Safeline Kids . org.....very handy! You can only buy as much as will fit in a basket....or make a few trips through the check out. Less irritating than having to scrap your whole plan for the day. It was also really good for immobilizing wiggly ones in stores. Smaller than a lot of strollers. TINY WHEELS. And a bit rickety. But, you always have it with you and your child is already in it I used up 3 of them!

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