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Seeking tolerant, inclusive Catholic community

Oct 2007

My husband and I are lapsed Catholics and we are looking to join a church with our 4-year old to give her a religious base. We would like to find a church community that is tolerant, all inclusive, has community outreach and has a program for youngsters. While we would like to stay with the Catholic church or something close to it, I don't really know if can find the qualities we are looking for. Does anyone have an suggestions for churches in Oakland or Berkeley that we can try out? anon


It's wonderful that you're giving this some thought. I too was a lapsed Catholic for many years, until my father's death brought me to a new way of thinking. We attend Newman Center Holy Spirit Parish, the Newman center of the Cal community. The 9:30 mass is very family friendly, both in the main sanctuary, as well as in the ''little church'', which is a pre-school program which takes place during the mass. There is a wonderful group leader for this program who is also a Kindergarten teacher. She relies on parent volunteers to handle different Sundays (basically, that means bringing a simple craft project idea or a book to share). If you would like to try out the preschool program there, be prepared to stay with your child the entire time for the first couple of Sundays. It helps him/her ease into the experience. I find the 9:30 mass experience to be rejuvenating and thought-provoking. The priests give engaging homilies, and the congregation does not shy away from voicing their opinions (respectfully) about controversial issues within the church.

The congregation seems diverse regarding race, background, and sexual preference (including same-sex couples with children). There is also a program specifically for lapsed Catholics who are thinking about coming back to the church. Come some Sunday at 9:30 and go upstairs afterwards for coffee and donuts, just to check out the vibe. Good luck in your searching! Catholic searcher


Our Church is not in Oakland or Berkeley but, it is a very welcoming Parish and may be a good fit ... St. John the Baptist in El Cerrito. Definitely come and visit us the Family Mass is at 9:30 which is when I go with my Family. There is a Sunday School Class that is held during the 9:30 Mass for Pre-K and Kindergarten. Grades 1 through 9 meet from 10:45am to noon. My Daughter did this two years in a row and will now be joining us at Mass since she is in Kindergarten there and receiving theology in a daily basis. Now, it's my Son's turn and he is thrilled! Pam Vincent is the Director of this Program and she is great!
I have to give a plug for my parish, St. Mary Magdalen. The church is on Berryman between Milvia and Henry. The family-oriented mass is 9:30. During the school year we have a Children's Liturgy for preschool through fourth grade during the readings/homily with the kids rejoining their families for the Liturgy of the Eucharist. There is a separate CCD program for kindergarten and up. The parish has a peace and justice committee that sponsors dinner for the poor on the first and fourth Sunday of the month. There is a coffee hour (donuts) after mass that is fun for the kids and the grownups. We also have a playgroup that meets on Thursday mornings. I have been in the parish for eight years and have met many very nice people. I would also recommend the Holy Spirit Parish (Newman Center) at Dwight and College. They have a great children's program and I have always found the preachers to be terrific. We don't go there because that I wanted my kids to go to Catholic school and the School of the Madeleine is excellent. Luckily, the parish has been great also.

I would suggest visiting a few different parishes to see what works for your family. I think that you will find that most Catholic parishes in this area are pretty liberal. Good luck. joan


St Alban's Episcopal Church (which is located directly on the Albany-Berkeley border just off Solano, at Curtis and Washington) would probably meet your needs. My husband was raised Catholic and I was not, and we went to St Alban's as a kind of middle ground. It's a small church with great music, a nice community feeling, and blossoming youth programs, including a Godly Play session for 4-7 year olds. Lori

Returning to the church, seeking a community

Feb 2007

After being raised Catholic and then not attending church for about 10 years, I am excited to become part of a church community again and especially excited about exposing my two young children to religion. I have attended mass at a few churches and have decided that I'd like to join the parish of either St. Theresa or Corpus Christi, both in Oakland. I am also making plans to have my children baptized at this time. Can members of BPN and parishioners of these churches give me any insight into why you may have chosen to become part of one community over the other? Thank you for any thoughts you may have on these churches. Back to religion


I attended both parishes when I was picking a church and ended up at St. Augustine Church in Rockridge. It's warm, friendly, with great music and a fabulous pastor and associate pastor. We have lots of young children and a good children's liturgy program. Check it out before you choose. Jackie
We recently moved to the bay area and tried several churches, including Corpus Christi. We really love St. Mary Magdelene in Berkeley, it's got a great and very active church community, as well as a great children's program. We also really like the new pastor Father David and always look forward to his homily. We have to drive a ways to get to St. MM but it's definitely worth it. anon
I'm new to St. Theresa's, but I'm very encouraged by 4 things: 1. their women's group (WINGS - Women in God's Spirit), is very friendly/welcoming, organized by theme throughout the year, and has a speaker, prayer, small group discussion, and ... childcare (for the daytime WINGS)! WINGS is a good mix of 30 somethings with small children and wonderful grandmothers with life experience to share. 2. the 9am family mass' Kinderchurch (Pre-K & K, like Sunday School), is age appropriate, caring, organized, with crafts, story, song, prayer - my nervous, clingy little guy now forgets to say, ''Bye, Mom!'' - since he enjoys it so much. 3. the general friendliness of everyone I've met 4. it seems to be a well-off parish, in terms of family income. However, according to the fast fundraising for a new school building campaign, it appears the parishoners put their money where their mouth is in terms of giving & tithing. Take it with a grain of salt - I'm still new there - but I can't wait to get more involved. It seems a good fit for our family. A good way to meet people, too, is to take your kids to the church/school playground for the 15 minutes they open it up right after the 9am mass. happy to be home

Looking for very liberal Catholic church

May 2006

Hi everyone:
I am originally from Argentina, a mainly but not only Catholic country. So, eventhough I consider myself an agnostic now and I don't agree with religious institutions I am culturally Catholic and I would like to pass that 'culture' to my son. I feel torn, though, because in general I find the religion's principles to be too conservative. Basically, what I need, is a very liberal church, if there is one...:) And, if possible, do you know of a church that is old enough that looks like the century-old European ones? Thanks a lot. Non-traditional Catholic

Recommended:

  • Corpus Christi Oakland
  • Our Lady of Lourdes Oakland (3 reviews)
  • St. Mary Magdalen N. Berkeley

    More advice:

    I believe Newman Center in Berkeley is fairly liberal. We attend the Church of the Assumption in San Leandro. While I would not call it liberal, we are lucky to have finally been sent a priest who is inclusive with both adults and children. Our experience at our son's recent first communion was great. Another church in town is St. Leanders. The few times I have been there, it seems quite lively. I believe they have mass in Spanish. The church is old but the pews have been turned sideways in an attempt to make it more modern. The place to avoid is Margaret Mary in Oakland - they still have mass in Latin and from what I hear its quite dogmatic. Good Luck Returned to the Church


    I am a practicing Catholic in Berkeley. In my experience, most of the Catholic churches in Berkeley are pretty liberal. When I was younger (before kids) I really enjoyed mass at the Newman Center at Dwight and College. That is the most liberal church I have ever attended.

    I am currently a member of St. Mary Magdalen parish, at Berryman and Henry, and I love it. I have three kids and there is a very family friendly congregation. We go to 9:30 mass, which is the mass that most of the families with small children attend.

    As far as the physical church, St Joseph the Worker on Addison is a beautiful church. They have a mass in Spanish at 11:00 a.m. and a very diverse community. Good luck Joan


    I understand your concerns about the institutional Catholic church. I was raised Catholic but drifted for many of the reasons you cite. When I moved to San Francisco, I literally bumped into a wonderful Dominican church and I became very active in its young adults group. Not only did I return to the Catholic church, I returned as an adult who had questions and struggles and some anger too- and found that I was welcome. I still have issues with some Catholic teachings- as do many of my Catholic friends- but it is my spiritual home, and I feel nurtured and fed by the Sacraments, the community and the exceptional lay folks and clergy I have found in many different parishes over the years. I also should mention that there are many teachings of the Church that are in fact, exceptionally progressive - for instance, the social justice teachings on immigration issues. If you are interested in a welcoming community with a brilliant, thoughtful and progressive pastor and the architecture you mention, check out St Dominics in San Francisco - their website is www.stdominics.org.

    You need not go as far as SF to find a progressive Catholic church, luckily. If you check the BPN files, you'll see recommendations for several churches in Berkeley/Oakland that sound wonderful. (St Augustine and St Columba sound great- I have never been there but hope someone from there weighs in with more info). It also mentions Holy Spirit Parish/Newman Hall which I have attended - it is affiliated with UC, is Paulist (a very progressive order and community) - but probably not the architecture you are looking for. Their website is www.calnewman.org.

    When we moved to the East Bay and became parents, we discovered another Dominican Church called St Mary Magdalene in North Berkeley. (note: the Dominicans are an order of the church known for, among other things, great ''preaching'', i.e. thoughtful homililes!). Their website is www.marymagdalen.org. We have found it to be a very warm and welcoming community. We go to the 9:30 on Sunday a.m. and hang out in the back with other parents of small (semi-noisy!) kids. During the ''liturgy of the word'' (the first half of the mass) they often have a ''children's dismissal'' where you can go with your little one down to the parish hall and they have a more age-appropriate telling of the gospel, some artwork etc.

    If you just feel alone in your struggles, you might want to check out a light-hearted but smart website (again, run by Paulists)which has a very contemporary flavor, great articles, forums for actual disagreements among Catholics etc. It's www.bustedhalo.com

    Many Catholic churches also have a wonderful, welcoming, lay- run program called ''Landings'' for returning Catholics who have questions, concerns etc.

    Wherever your path leads you, I sincerely hope that you find a growth-filled spiritual home for you and your family. Even when our kids are being squirmy or fussy, even when we are late or cranky or work has been nuts, we find that mass provides the one guaranteed time of the week where my husband and I share an authentic moment of catching each other's eye and acknowledging the amazing blessings that we have in our children and each other. It is something that truly sustains me during the wild ups and downs of parenting! Trish


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