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Advice about Wills, Estates & Trusts

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Writing a will; don't want my family making claims

March 2006

My husband and I are trying to write a will- but this is quite new to us. I want to be as precise in the will as possible, as to prevent my family from making claims to our estate or to our child. I would like to leave my brother some money, but only for his retirement. He is notoriously bad with money and I don't want him to spend it before then. Is there any way to do that? Also any advice about keeping my family out of it? any advice would be greatly appreciated. anon


You should consult an estate planning attorney. It is worth the money and hopefully will prevent/lessen painful moments for your children regardless of when you die. Most estate planning attorneys will give you a 2-hour free consultation which they use to suggest which documents you need to have drawn. Martha
You should contact an attorney to discuss the possibility of a trust. You could provide for your brother's retirement to be administered through the trust, name your alternate trustees and guardians for your child, and designate how the trust is to be passed to your child. anon
There are several ways to ensure that your brother will be provided for, without necessarily leaving money to him directly. For instance, a trust can be easily established during your lifetime which will operate to protect him. You would want to set it up carefully - probably with the aid of an attorney - so that he would have access to some funds in case of major emergency (at someone else's discretion!) but so that he didn't fritter it away.

As far as keeping your family out of it, I'm not entirely sure what your goal is. Do you simply want to ensure that none of your relatives have access to the money, or are you trying to make sure that none of your relatives inherit? Either way, an attorney could help you here as well.

Please feel free to contact me if you have more specific questions, or if I can be of any further assistance. Kathleen


Estate planning for unmarried couple

March 2006

I am trying to organize wills and retirement for myself and my partner and have some complicated questions. Do we need a financial advisor or lawyer to answer these? We are an unmarried hetero couple with a 20 year age difference and a young child. Should we marry? I am slightly opposed to the institution. If we leave our assets to eachother in a will, will the state override this (since we are unmarried) and grant them to our child? If not, will there be inheritance taxes or probate that would not happen if we were married? If we marry and my partner needs expensive medical care at the end of his life (a very likely possibility today), will we be required to spend all of our joint retirement assets before we will get assistance from the state? If so, given our age difference, I will enter retirement destitute (or never retire). We save 15% of our income for retirement, but have very modest incomes and know nothing about investment, so this doesn't add up to much. Is there any way that I can leave my full assets to my partner if die, but also hold on to my retirement savings until I actually retire? Could trusts help? should we marry? Who can answer these questions????? confused


A former colleague of mine and her then boyfriend (now husband) were in the midst of setting up a slew of provisions,etc. with their attorney regarding her son (from a previous marriage) and her daugher (with the boyfriend). The attorney finally told them it would be easier if they just got married which they did (and still are married). However, if getting married is not an option for you, you definitely need to consult an estate planning attorney for all of the reasons you have mentioned. From personal experience in dealing with my mother's estate planning (she is alive but now suffering from dementia) and setting up a trust with my husband, it is imperative that people do estate planning when young children are involved to say nothing of getting it on paper what your end-of-life wishes are healthwise. Martha
You need to consult an attorney who can answer your questions. The short answer to your question, however, is no, you do not need to marry to achieve your objectives. Either a will or trust document, properly prepared, will override the default distributions that occur when someone dies intestate. anon
It sounds like you have some issues that require professional advice. I recommend going to see Jarrett Topel who is a financial planner in Oakland. He prepared a financial plan for us and also referred us to an estate planning attorney who set up a living trust for us which sounds like what you will need. Jarrett's first appointment is free, so you could probably get some good information without having to pay an arm and a leg just to sit down and get some advice. His number is 510-655- 4400. E-mail: jarrett.b.topel@ampf.com Good luck. Tracy
Well, I confess that I don't much advocate marriage if both people aren't keen on the idea. So - how to accomplish your goals without marriage? Actually, it's not all that difficult. You will need to draft your estate plan carefully, though, if you want to leave everything to each other, rather than to your child. Revocable living trusts are probably a good idea if you want to avoid probate. If you don't get married, of course, your retirement assets won't be at risk for his medical care. As far as inheritance taxes are concerned, that will depend upon the size of your estate. There is no California estate tax; the federal estate tax currently affects only estates that exceed $2 million. If this is you, there are certainly things you can do in your estate planning that will reduce (or in some cases eliminate) your tax exposure.

Although some of this work could be done on your own, I strongly recommend that you see an estate planning attorney in order to create the best plan for your particular circumstances. As an estate planning lawyer myself, I do sometimes refer people to a financial advisor who can help them make the most of the assets they have, as well as helping to build a tax shelter if appropriate. However, it's the design of the plan itself that will be the most useful to you in accomplishing the specific goals you mentioned in your post.

Please feel free to email me directly if I can be of any further assistance to you. Kathleen


How do I find out if I'm mentioned in my father's will?

Feb 2004

If you're mentioned in someone's will, how do you find out about it? My father died a few weeks ago. He's been married to his second wife for over 25 years. While we've maintained a good relationship with our father, my brothers and I have always had issues with his wife. We're assuming that if there is a will, she gets everything (they never had kids and she has no children). BUT if he was thinking of us, how long would it take for us to be contacted? (The obvious thing would be to ask his wife, but for many PAINFUL reasons we can't bring ourselves to!) Just wondering


You can ask your question on the estates message board of findlaw.com. If your father had a will it should be probated and at that time you will probably get a notice. If your father had a living trust and the amount of his probate estate is below certain thresholds then you probably will not get notice from the probate court but you should get notice from the successor trustee of the trust. California has certain requirements for notification of legal heirs, those that would inherit if there was no will. What does this mean for you? Unless you want to discuss this with your step-mother you will have to wait and see if you get a notice. Alternatively, you (as an interested party) could bring a probate action for your father's estate. This will cost you some attorney's fees and likely could poison your tenous relationship with your step-mother. To fully understand this course of action consult an attorney. Good luck! anon
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