UCB Parents Jokes & Quotes:
Things you learn from your children

This page is brought to you by UC Berkeley Parents Network Back to the Jokes & Quotes Collection



     If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong
     enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing pound puppy underwear and a
     superman cape.

     It is strong enough, however, to spread paint on all four walls of a
     20 by 20 foot room

     When you hear the toilet flush and the words "Uh-oh," it's already too
     late

     Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it

     A six year old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36
     year old man says they can only do it in the movies

     If you use a waterbed as home plate while wearing baseball shoes it
     does not leak - it explodes

     A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq foot house 4
     inches deep

     Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a four year old

     Super glue is forever

     McGyver can teach us many things we don't want to know

     No matter how much Jello you put in a swimming pool you still can't
     walk on water

     A six year old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36
     year old man says they can only do it in the movies

     If you use a waterbed as home plate while wearing baseball shoes it
     does not leak - it explodes

     A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq foot house 4
     inches deep

     Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a four year old

     Super glue is forever

     McGyver can teach us many things we don't want to know

     No matter how much Jello you put in a swimming pool you still can't
     walk on water

     Pool filters do not like Jello

     VCR's do not eject PB&J sandwiches even though TV commercials show
     they do

     Always look in the oven before you turn it on

     The fire department in San Jose has at least a 5 minute response time

     The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earth worms dizzy

     It will however make cats dizzy

     Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy


UCB Parents Home Page UCB Parents Recommendations UCB Parents Advice

The opinions and statements expressed on this page are those of parents who belong to the UC Berkeley Parents Network and should not be taken as a position of or endorsement by the University of California, Berkeley.
Last modified March 8, 1998