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Worried about 24 year old son's bike safety

May 2011

My 24 year old son lives here in Berkeley, rides his bike to work and his various activities, including aikido and grocery shopping and evening events. He refuses to wear a bike helmet and the lights on his bike are often broken/stolen/or not functioning in general. He won't wear reflective clothing either.

I should add that he doesn't live at home, though we see him once a week for dinner at our house. He is very responsible in all other ways. He graduated from college, he has a job, he found his own health insurance, he pays all his own bills. He doesn't own a car, though he is welcome to borrow ours when needed.

I am beside myself with worry over the bike safety issue. I have tried talking to him about it. I offered to buy him a helmet. I have replaced his lights on every holiday you can imagine. I have tried not bringing it up.

Any ideas? My latest thought was mentioning that if he gets seriously hurt, he will wind up living back at home and will lose the independence he values so much.

We have a good relationship except for this. I would love some suggestions. Worrying MOM


I had this problem with my son too - I bought helmets that he didn't wear, and I watched him leave on his bike from my house holding the helmet in his hand. I was so worried and I nagged him constantly about it because he uses his bike to get everywhere - to school, to work, to friends' houses, all over Berkeley and Oakland, in the wee hours of the morning. Then last summer just before he turned 25 he started wearing his bike helmet, and he still wears it now every single time. He came over today and I asked him what made him start wearing it. Typically, he said ''Oh no reason in particular.'' but when I pushed him on it, he said he had had a couple of close shaves with cars. ''There are a lot of idiots on the road!'' he said, ''I don't want to die!''. But I also know that around the time he started wearing the helmet again, one of his best friends was hit by a car biking home from a party in Oakland late at night and was knocked off his bike and lay unconscious for a few hours before he woke up and made his way home (he was OK, thankfully). So that probably had something to do with it. Anyway, with my son I think it was a matter of finally becoming mature enough at 25 to realize he was taking a risk. I hope that your kid realizes that too, without getting hurt first! fingers crossed
I totally understand your fears. I would feel the same way. Perhaps I will in the future. It sounds like your son knows how you feel and that you have done a great job in terms of offering to help. However, your son is quite responsible in other ways, a grown man, and in charge of these important decisions for himself. If you know the serenity prayer it might help. We do have to let go when it comes to our adult children as painful as it might be..... Rachel
As hard as it is a parent, I think this will be a case of live and learn, or he could just never have an accident. I had two serious bike accidents, once when I was 25, riding with no helmet, and spent several days hospitalized with a concussion; the second when I was 30, riding now with a helmet, and spent three weeks on medical leave with a broken elbow. Both times I had great friends help me out and was not a burden on my parents. -- riding seldomly now
I don't mean to sound harsh, but as you stated your son is now a full-fledged adult and makes his own decisions. I would say the person that needs the help right now is you. One of our hardest jobs as parents is to let go. It is a constant lesson to be learned over and over at each stage of our children's lives. It seems that you are having a hard time doing this right now. You may want to go to a support group or individual therapist to deal with your anxiety. Good luck... Jenny
Please leave your son alone on the helmet issue! Riding a bike is quite safe, safer than walking. The health benefits he gets from cycling outweigh the risks, in my opinion, since he is looking at less heart disease, less diabetes risk, less depression, etc.

Keep buying him lights, since those do get stolen, and encourage him to be visible and follow the rules of the road. But please don't discourage his biking - a car is more dangerous to himself, others, and the environment. Please look at this page to get some perspective on the actual level of risk from cycling: http://www.kenkifer.com/bikepages/health/risks.htm

Finally, unfortunately, a helmet would offer very little protection if he was struck by a car; a human body simply cannot withstand an impact with a large metal object, even with a helmet on its head. A fellow cyclist


Worrying MOM,

I highly recommend that your son get a helmet and high visibility clothing. And, if he does any cycling after dark, a headlight and flashing taillight.

I have done much cycling over the years. I have ridden cross-country, extensively in Canada, and thru many Western and Eastern US states. For the last 20+ years, bicycling has been my main form of transportation to work between Alameda and Berkeley. My point is not to impress, but to point out I've ridden a lot and I'm out there almost everyday. I consider myself a very skilled and highly aware bicyclist.

In my earlier years, I would not even consider a helmet or any kind of fancy equipment. I still think jersies, riding pants, and bike cleats are for dorks or wanna-bes. Maybe your son does, too. Maybe, as I used to, he thinks he's too good of a rider for anything to happen to him.

What changed my mind was riding some 15+ mph down MLK Jr Wy at 530P and having a car door open in front of me with no time to stop, being ejected, landing in the middle of the street, and thereby left at the mercy of the trailing motorists to see me and stop in time to avoid running me over. That, and trip to the ER, the stitches, the 5 weeks off of work, and the permanent facial scars.

Since that day, I have worn a bicycle helmet and made myself as visible as possible when riding. That did not prevent the 2 other times I hit car doors that were carelessly flung open, most recently 3 months ago on Telegraph Ave south of campus, sending me to the ER for X-rays. Nor, the countless times I have had to take evasive action to avoid careless, indifferent, or even spiteful (yes) motorists.

I adapted to a helmet almost immediately. And, other safety equipment (lights, clothing, reflective material) is cheap insurance and quite unobtrusive.

Believe me, things are vastly different today. There are more cars on the road, they drive faster, the motorists are in a much bigger hurry, and they are more distracted (cell phone, DVD, IPod) and/or angry.

Tell your son it can happen to anyone. IT CAN HAPPEN TO HIM. And, in many situations, the most experienced bicylist won't have the skill and/or time to prevent it. Michael


Encourage a police officer to issue a citation for lack of a light: http://dmv.ca.gov/pubs/vctop/d11/vc21201.htm
V C Section 21201 Equipment Requirements Equipment Requirements 21201. (a) No person shall operate a bicycle on a roadway unless it is equipped with a brake which will enable the operator to make one braked wheel skid on dry, level, clean pavement. (b) No person shall operate on the highway a bicycle equipped with handlebars so raised that the operator must elevate his hands above the level of his shoulders in order to grasp the normal steering grip area. (c) No person shall operate upon a highway a bicycle that is of a size that prevents the operator from safely stopping the bicycle, supporting it in an upright position with at least one foot on the ground, and restarting it in a safe manner. (d) A bicycle operated during darkness upon a highway, a sidewalk where bicycle operation is not prohibited by the local jurisdiction, or a bikeway, as defined in Section 890.4 of the Streets and Highways Code, shall be equipped with all of the following: (1) A lamp emitting a white light that, while the bicycle is in motion, illuminates the highway, sidewalk, or bikeway in front of the bicyclist and is visible from a distance of 300 feet in front and from the sides of the bicycle. (2) A red reflector on the rear that shall be visible from a distance of 500 feet to the rear when directly in front of lawful upper beams of headlamps on a motor vehicle. (3) A white or yellow reflector on each pedal, shoe, or ankle visible from the front and rear of the bicycle from a distance of 200 feet. (4) A white or yellow reflector on each side forward of the center of the bicycle, and a white or red reflector on each side to the rear of the center of the bicycle, except that bicycles that are equipped with reflectorized tires on the front and the rear need not be equipped with these side reflectors. (e) A lamp or lamp combination, emitting a white light, attached to the operator and visible from a distance of 300 feet in front and from the sides of the bicycle, may be used in lieu of the lamp required by paragraph (1) of subdivision (d). Amended Ch. 723, Stats. 1979. Effective January 1, 1980. Amended Sec. 1, Ch. 232, Stats. 2007. Effective January 1, 2008.
avid cyclist
Tragically, it appears that it is legal for an adult to ride a bike without a helmet in California. http://dmv.ca.gov/pubs/vctop/d11/vc21212.htm
V C Section 21212 Youth Bicycle Helmets Minors Youth Bicycle Helmets: Minors 21212. (a) A person under 18 years of age shall not operate a bicycle, a nonmotorized scooter, or a skateboard, nor shall they wear in-line or roller skates, nor ride upon a bicycle, a nonmotorized scooter, or a skateboard as a passenger, upon a street, bikeway, as defined in Section 890.4 of the Streets and Highways Code, or any other public bicycle path or trail unless that person is wearing a properly fitted and fastened bicycle helmet that meets the standards of either the American Society for Testing and Materials (ASTM) or the United States Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC), or standards subsequently established by those entities. This requirement also applies to a person who rides upon a bicycle while in a restraining seat that is attached to the bicycle or in a trailer towed by the bicycle. (b) Any helmet sold or offered for sale for use by operators and passengers of bicycles, nonmotorized scooters, skateboards, or in-line or roller skates shall be conspicuously labeled in accordance with the standard described in subdivision (a) which shall constitute the manufacturer's certification that the helmet conforms to the applicable safety standards. (c) No person shall sell, or offer for sale, for use by an operator or passenger of a bicycle, nonmotorized scooter, skateboard, or in-line or roller skates any safety helmet which is not of a type meeting requirements established by this section. (d) Any charge under this subdivision shall be dismissed when the person charged alleges in court, under oath, that the charge against the person is the first charge against that person under this subdivision, unless it is otherwise established in court that the charge is not the first charge against the person. (e) Except as provided in subdivision (d), a violation of this section is an infraction punishable by a fine of not more than twenty-five dollars ($25). The parent or legal guardian having control or custody of an unemancipated minor whose conduct violates this section shall be jointly and severally liable with the minor for the amount of the fine imposed pursuant to this subdivision. Etc.... . Amended Sec. 6, Ch. 674, Stats. 1996. Effective January 1, 1997. Amended Sec. 1, Ch. 475, Stats. 2002. Effective January 1, 2003.
avid cyclist

Urban Biking Guidelines for teens

June 2010

My son, 15, has grown up in an urban part of Oakland where he can't really ride his bike freely. And he learned to ride late, too, visiting in the country. Now he has two friends, very experienced cyclists, asking him to ride his bike to meet them in Montclair to swim this summer. I completely understand my son's wish to show up on his bike to meet them. But I don't even know how to picture this. He has never ridden his bike in traffic, ever. And to go uphill so far? And to come downhill? I was hoping to find some organized bike rides or groups for him (Sierra Club? Other?)--can anyone recommend anything like that? But he has his heart set on this other plan. Guidelines for saying no? Suggestions for what is appropriate for his age and experience level, and/or how to get him the practice he needs before setting him loose on the roads? And then if these boys also ask him to go on some long bike rides? I am not over-protective and am happy for him to do adventurous independent things with friends. I also don't want him to get hurt on his bike. Willing in Principle But Not in Practice (Yet?)


My 14 yr. old took 2 excellent free classes through the East Bay Bicycle Coalition - one a classroom class, on the rules of the road and biking in traffic, the other on the streets of Oakland. He was by far the youngest in the class, but it was invaluable in learning to bike in traffic, and for me to have peace of mind that he could navigate his way to school without becoming road pizza. Highly recommend it! Great group of people! http://www.ebbc.org/ Good luck! Carolyn
I am a mom too and can sympathize with your worry; however, I know from my own teen years that bike riding is a great thing for teenagers. I biked everywhere and went on to commute by bike in several big cities. No major accidents and a great sense of autonomy. I don't know much about organized rides locally, but I know that Missing Link Bike store in Berkeley teaches free repair classes, including one on bike commuting. I would of course insist that your son wear a helmet and carry water. The uphill rides are perfect for teenager energy. Here's to clean air and healthy kids
Sounds great to have them bike: one problem I see here is car drivers just opening their driver side doors without first checking for bicyclists to come by. We have to really warn our kids about this. Regarding the uphills and downhills, I would just let your son practice. Maybe he can bike it with you following in car/on bike to practice first? Biking is great, but you got to have both eyes open at all times here! Big Biker
The East Bay Bicycle Coalition offers free bicycle safety classes which would be good starting point. http://www.ebbc.org/?q=safety Perhaps take a class with your son and then riding together with him for a while. Anwyl
hello,

As a college student, I worked as a bicycle tour leader for younger teens and it was very challenging to get this age kids, who feel immortal, like to take risks, and who don't have the experience of being a driver, to understand road safety. But, a lot can be done to raise awareness, and the independence and physical fitness that comes with being a skilled cyclist is valuable!

A really good resource is the East Bay Bike Coalition, an advocacy group that has lots of safety information and offers classes about biking safely. The Missing Link, a bike shop on Shattuck, also has classes. And the SF Bike Coalition does, too. If your teen is interested in longer rides, checking out a cycling club can be a good idea and then he will have contact with more experienced adult cyclists who can share their skills and experience.

I'm a cyclist and a long-time driver, and one thing I see a lot that concerns me is ill-fitting helmets that would not do their job if the rider fell off the bike and hit their head. A well-fitting helmet is key. This means a somewhat uncomfortably snug chin strap! Also, as uncool as it may seem, brigh colored clothing help with visibility. best to you and your family, Ilene


Check out East Bay Bicycle Coalition http://www.ebbc.org/ They have safety courses for all ages and are a great resource for local cycling information. Everything your son wants to do is appropriate on a bike. Believe it or not, bikes do go uphill into Monclair just fine! I can personally attest to this. This is a great opportunity for him to learn to get around on his own and to have some transportation independence. As the parent of 2 teenage boys who have bicycled to school and elsewhere since middle school, high school is a 6 mile ride from N Berkeley to Oakland, I think you're being overly protective. But do have him take a safety course first. Insist that he ALWAYS wear a helmet and spend the money on whatever cool bike helmet he wants. You want him to like it and always wear it. (not a skate or BMX helmet - they are hot and heavy) He should also carry a map and his phone too! also a bike parent
It sounds like a potentially positive experience, and an opportunity for him to spend time with experience bicyclists. The details matter. What are the possible routes? Some are much better than others. You should ride it a couple of times yourself to see what it is like, from the perspective of a bicyclist. Talk to the other kids parents. And check http://www.ebbc.org/ and post your question on their forum too. I live in Montclair, and know some of the routes. paseidl

Bicycle safety class for teenagers?

June 2009

I am looking for a bicycle safety class (preferably Berkeley and on the weekend for a working mom) for my 14 year old son who just got a road bicycle and he wants to train on it this summer. He is preparing for a 200 mile school bike trip that he will be participating in this fall in high school.He has mostly rode with me in the past but during the summer he will be riding on his own and needs more instruction (my opininon). I have contacted East Bay Bike Coalition and they don't have any classes..nor does Missing Link where we bought the bike. Bike safety conscious mom.


There seems to be a real gap in the market for bicycle safety classes for teenagers. I wanted one for my 13-year old who was getting a fixie to ride to school etc, and couldn't find any.

In the end Dave Campbell, the chair of the East Bay Bike Coalition, said that if an adult/parent went to the class with him, my son could attend their safety course. Which is what he did. And I would highly recommend it. He is definitely more savvy about predicting driver behavior and taking precautions. Maybe if enough people express an interest in a teenager course the EBBC will organize one. You can reach Dave Campbell on: dcampbel@lmi.net (note just one ''L'') or 510-701-5971 Good luck. Tracey


Check with your local police dept, especially if it has a bike division. I know the El Cerrito Police give classses to school groups and are also available at the El Cerrito 4th of July fair. EC mom
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