Berkeley Parents Network: Spouse's Snoring

Berkeley Parents Network

Spouse's Snoring

Berkeley Parents Network > Advice > Sleep > Spouse's Snoring

Sept 2002

My husband snores very, very loudly. Several years ago he was diagnosed with mild sleep apnea. He has an appointment in November with a sleep clinic to assess this further. Unfortunately, we could not get an appointment sooner. We are having our first baby this October and I can't wait any longer for the snoring to stop! The snoring has gotten so severe that it keeps me up throughout the night and interferes with my sleep. Once I am up, it is very difficult to get back to sleep. There are a few postings on this issue from previous inquiries but I am wondering if anyone can recommend a physician (preferably with Health Net) that will be able to see my husband before November! Also, if anyone has other recommendations on snoring remedies, please let me know. There are numerous products advertised on the internet claiming to help with snoring, but I have no idea whether any of them work. Thanks. maria

I have been seeing Dr. Glen Petersen who is a pulmonary specialist with an office at Alta Bates for my sleep apnea problem. I think he takes Health Net. Also, I was referred in the past to Dr. Joanna Cooper, who is a neurologist at Dr's Hospital in Pinole. I think she also takes Health Net. Good luck. Anonymous

My husband snores so loud that the roof shakes. Before our baby was born i wore earpugs and could sleep, even though I still heard him a little. Now, with my little one I have to sleep in the other room. My husband snores worse according to his weight, he needs to lose some now to stop snoring.

I don't know if the remedies work and I've heard that the operation isn't too effective. I sleep with my husband until the baby (19mos) wakes, at which point I go to sleep on the pullout futon that I have already set up. I sleep with my baby (still nursing in the night) until the morn.

I know you want advice that tells you that you will enjoy sleep. But I tell you that when I first had the baby I slept with my baby and my husband in the bed and never heard him snore. I was so dead tired that I only woke to the stir of my baby.

Sleep is never what it used to be after the baby.....you'll adjust. I was the biggest sleep lover you could ever had met.....now I just get it when I can. Good Luck anon

My brother tried the ''surgery'' for his throat that works for some people. He had it done 3 times (it often must be repeated to be effective) and it didn't have any effect for him. My sister-in- law is often tired.

I realize this is no solution, but my husband and I sleep in separate rooms and it works well. We both sleep better. I've confessed this little secret to a few women and (surprise!) they confide that they have separate sleeping arrangements too! Our sex lives haven't suffered. anon

My husband has snored loudly throughout the entire time we have been together. Seems to be that treatment for the snorer is either ineffective (such as BreatheRight strips) or drastic/dangerous (e.g., mechanical breathing apparatuses or operations). My solution: I wear earplugs. lawson

The ''drastic'' response to relieve snoring that I assume folks were talking about in the 9/6/02 edition, not only relieves snoring, but could save lives. Sleep Apnea is a serious problem. I would recommend that serious snorers see a sleep disorders doctor who can test them for Apnea. While their spouse may be losing sleep, the snorer often is not sleeping either. My doctor told me after my sleep study that I never reached REM sleep and never even made it stage 2 sleep. I was waking about every 45 seconds to a minute to recover my breathing which had brought my blood oxygen to a very dangerous level. While I didn't know I was in a serious condition, I did know that I would wake up in the morning not feeling rested at all. I now wear an oxygen mask (from a CPAP machine) that forces a continuous stream of air up my nose and keeps my airway clear. I have had the best sleep that I can remember and feel refreshed and energetic for the first time in years. I highly recommend that you encourage your ''others'' to check it out and make sure that their snoring is not just affecting you.

I made an appointment CA Center for Sleep Disorders in Oakland (510-834-8337). The doctor I saw said that from the redness and swelling in my throat he couild tell that I did have Sleep Apnea and ordered the sleep study. They scheduled it in their office for the next week and I had the results a few days later. Also, Stanford has a well-recommended sleep clinic as well.. Jon

Dec 2001

My husband has always been a loud snorer--so loud in fact, that I can pretty much hear him from every room of our house when he's asleep and snoring in the bedroom. He snores despite sleeping on his stomach, side, etc. and things like those Breathe Right nasal strips don't work on him. I've tolerated his snoring for many years but now that we have little kids and I'm pretty sleep-deprived as it is, it's unbearable to have to lose more sleep over snoring.

We'll probably seek the advice of our health practicioner but I'm wondering if anyone out there has experienced any positive or negative results from snore reduction surgery (our medical coverage is with Kaiser Permanente). Assuming that my husband doesn't have any serious problems (sleep apnea, etc.) we'll probably explore this option. Thanks.

Instead of going the surgery route, you might want to at least look into other options. I have a snoreguard device that I wear to sleep when I don't want to snore. It's like a hinged top and bottom retainer molded to my teeth that forces my lower jaw to jut out and creates more breathing space at night. It works pretty well, and isn't too uncomfortable if you wear it all the time. There is another device that is more fixed, but also molded to your teeth that takes up more mouth space and lets the wearer breath through a small hole. Both devices can be obtained through a dentist. My snoreguard cost about $300 maybe two years ago. Lots cheaper and less invasive than surgery, although not a permanent fix. Does your husband have a deviated septum? This could also contribute to snoring. Good luck, Anonymous

My husband and I had issues with his snoring. In the end, he had a sort of ultrasound that cauterized some of his nasal tissue. He is now snoring and making other disgusting mouth and nose noises far less than he had before. Good luck to you!

From what I've heard about the surgery, it's not something to undertake lightly. Do talk to your practitioner and consider the other options first. It's amazing to me that these guys don't wake themselves up with their snoring! Louise

My husband also is a snorer, and has now undergone two procedures for snoring. They have been VERY successful, and he snores far more softly, when he snores at all. This has been great for our marriage and family life (not to mention our friendships; before children, we went to one memorable NEw Year's gathering and sleep-over at someone's beach cabin, only to find that several people left the house in the middle of the night because they couldn't bear the snoring!!). A few words of advice:

Your husband should undergo a sleep study first. Apnea is no joke. My husband didn't have apnea, or at least the test was inconclusive. HE says that the quality of his rest improved dramatically after surgery, and that he never realized how tired he really was before. If a sleep study proves apnea, insurance will probably pay for the surgery. Otherwise, it's usually out-of-pocket (check with Kaiser on that). The surgery cost us a couple of thousand dollars -- it was worth it.

The surgery itself can take a couple of forms: there's the one my husband had, where they basically cauterize the soft palate -- unpleasant (you can smell your tissue burning), and recovery takes about a week. Then there's radial ablation, which does the same thing with vibration (I think). This is newer, less painful, but potentially less successful. Either way, your spouse will probably need to go through the procedure more than once before it really takes. AS I said, my husband has had two procedures: the most dramatic difference happened after the first one, but the snoring returned and he felt he needed another one about a year later. Eighteen months after procedure #2, he snores sometimes at the beginning of the night, but stops when he hits deep sleep, and also sometimes snores after drinking red wine. But the sound level and quality of the snoring is way, way different (softer, regular, more like a purr), and if it weren't for our always-up-at-three smaller baby, I'd sleep right through it all the time.

My husband snores long & loud, and the combination of that and the sleep deprivation caused by young ones is just dreadful. You have my sympathy! You should definitely look into sleep apnea. My husband has mild apnea, but nothing serious. Because I was so miserable with his snoring, he recently underwent snore reduction surgery (I'm not sure exactly what the procedure is called) at Kaiser in which radio waves were used to shrink the soft palette. The procedure was very uncomfortable, he couldn't talk for several days, and his throat hurt for at least a week afterwards. His snoring did not stop after the surgery, and in fact, got much louder immediately after the surgery. However, the volume eventually decreased by about 15 to 20 percent. He had another procedure done several months later. This one hurt less, and he recovered more quickly. However, the volume of his snoring has not decreased much -- maybe another 5 to 10 percent. We are considering whether to have him undergo a third procedure -- he was told sometimes it takes 3 or 4 procedures, and there is no guarantee. The one big improvement it made was that he used to start to snore while he was still half-awake. Now, he doesn't start snoring until he is more deeply asleep, which helps me somewhat. One caveat -- his snoring got much much worse immediately after the surgery both times, and was just unbearable for over a week. Dr. Cruz at Kaiser Oakland does the procedure, but it was not covered by our coverage, and we had to pay for it out of pocket. Would I recommend it? Maybe -- it helps a little, but is definitely not a miracle solution, or at least hasn't been for us. It is also expensive. Good luck, and silent dreams! Anonymous

About the snoring surgery. My father has been a terrific snorer for all of my life, and several years before that from what I'm told. If my father is sleeping in his bedroom with the door closed, you can hear him 2 floors below. Needless to say, it has significantly impacted my mothers life, though it does make for good comedy on family vacations . 10 years ago, when he was in his late 40's, he had a sleep study and was diagnosed with apnea -- please do not overlook this step! 4 or 5 years ago he finally got a CPAP machine, which is basiclly a mask hooked up to an oxygen machine. This has helped his snoring tremendously. However, because my parents travel a fair amount he decided to have surgery so he wouldn't have to lug his machine around the world with him. He has had surgery 2 times in the past year (cauterization of the uvula, I believe), both of which did nothing for him except give him a sore throat for a couple of weeks. So he's back to the CPAP. He sounds kind of like Darth Vader, but better that than a jackhammer! Tara

Sept 2001

One member of my family has a nasal condition that results in intermittent "whistling", congestion, and snoring. These noises are growing increasingly difficult for me to bear, to the point where I often do not want to be in the same room with him. We have been arguing about this, with little resolution. He is only somewhat willing to seek medical treatment for this, and has asked me to do what I can to try to be less bothered by these noises. Does anyone have experinces with such issues? I was wondering about hypnosis, but am open to all suggestions. Thanks. Elizabeth

Snoring can be an indicator of many things, from allergies and congestion, to a condition such as sleep apnea which can be serious. It would be a very good for your loved one to get a check up with your health practioner - no harm done, you'll probably get some help, and it could rule out any serious worries. best of luck. Nuckypuff

Oct 2000

My child is finally sleeping through the night but my poor husband is not because of my snoring!! I've seen ads re: pills (which I am reluctant to take) and other type of devices. Any advice? thanks. BB

This problem plagued my husband and me for several years. Our only solution seemed to be sleeping in separate rooms, but that caused additional unhappiness. I found a product online that works for most of the night, it's called Snoreless. It's a throat spray, made by Nutrition for Life. But I still woke him up in the early morning hours. Last summer when we were on vacation in the Southwest it was quite hot, so we used a large floor fan at night. My husband was able to sleep undisturbed! The droning of the fan blocked out my snoring noise. So now at home we use a small air purifier/fan called Bionaire, placed right next to his side of the bed, which serves the same purpose. I think they sell them at Home Depot. I thought we were doomed to sleeping apart, but these two simple things have solved the problem. Good luck!

If you snore a lot and pretty loudly, you might have sleep apnea, which may not only keep your husband awake, but could be dangerous to your health. People with apnea stop breathing momenarily many times each night and, as a result, wake up many times without even knowing it. It results in sleep deprivation, even though you may think you've slept through the night. Anyway, I'd check with a doctor about this, even if your husband's problem with your snoring has been solved. Craig

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