Toddler Won't Stay in Crib
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Toddler Won't Stay in Crib
May 2005
Our 2 year old is starting to show signs of being able to get
out of his crib. We are considering a transition, but are
worried about how it will affect his sleep. At night he goes to
sleep right away, but sometimes for naps he will talk and play
in his crib for a long time before falling asleep. I'm afraid
that with the ability to move around in his room he will never
fall asleep. Also, I have heard that sleep problems develop for
many kids when they move out of their cribs when they are
really young and can't be reasoned with to stay in bed. We have
a good thing going with his sleep and I'm worried about messing
it up! Has anyone experienced major sleep disruptions when
moving from crib-bed? Has anyone used a crib tent so their kids
could stay in their cribs longer?
Thanks!
We put our second in a bed at about 2 years (maybe even a bit earlier).
And yes, there was a session of getting out. Drove me absolutely nuts...
I would sit on the bed, on the floor, on a chair near the door. I would
calmly and firmly (''you are not getting any reaction with this'') and
sometimes not so calmly (''there are rules!! mommy has things to
do!!!'') put her back. I tried story tapes, closed doors, singing, long
monotone stories, absolute quiet, etc.... and then, suddenly, it
stopped.
Probably lasted for about two weeks...
So figure out the best routine for you and take lots of deep breaths...
and I hope it goes a LOT better for you than it did for us!
Happy When They're Asleep
I didn't see much response so I'll tell you our long ago
situation. Our son escaped his crib starting at just under 12
mos (he walked at 9 1/2 mos). He would get so upset he was
somehow able to fling himself over the rail. It went from one
time to every nite in a matter of weeks. We were frantic and
scared he would hurt himself. We looked at tents and netting
but I was fearful he would get caught up and hurt himself.
Finally one nite I took the matress out and put it on the
floor. We did our bed time routine and then ran out the door
and closed it. He ran around in a tantrum for a few nites until
he fell asleep, then we would go in and put him on the
mattress. Finally we took the side off the crib, put the
matress back and put up one of the slide in railings you
usually put on a bed when the kids first start sleeping in
a ''big boy bed''. Once he was able to get out, he didn't. He
basically stayed in bed. We think it was the idea of being
caged in. We moved him to a regular bed at 2 1/2. (Now he's a
teenager and I'd love if he got out of bed!)
been there
We were concerned about our 16 mo old daughter being able to
get over the top of the crib - she was just about there. We
found a great crib tent that prevents her from getting out. And
it means that once we put her to bed, we can just have the baby
monitor on and be sure that she's not pulling the silent escape
artist routine. At first I thought that the sound of the zipper
would wake her up, but for some reason it doesn't. Long story
short, once she's put to bed we can relax and have a bit of an
evening together. Worth every cent.
http://baby-safety-products.babycatalog.com/baby-safety-nursery/cozy-crib-tent-II-000214
Good luck!
Jeff
May 2004
Our 22 mos old son was going to sleep on his own and sleeping
through the night in his crib until he figured out how to climb
out of it! It's been total chaos ever since. Since we weren't
prepared for this to happen, we temporarily let him sleep in
our bed (of course feeling it was unsafe to leave him in his
crib anymore) until we got him his own ''big boy bed''.He managed
to get sick for 5 days twice during this timeframe as well
which prolonged his sleeping in our bed. Now he will not
willingly go to sleep in his own bed anymore and if we transfer
him after he falls asleep, he'll wander out in the middle of
the night, and again, won't go back to sleep in his own bed. We
have tried the ''Back in the box''technique by Dr.Weissbluth who
suggests putting them back in bed silently as many times as it
takes until they stay in bed. The first night this went on for
3 hours from 2AM-5AM and by the end of it he was laughing.A
game, of course.Needless to say, I was exhausted, had to work
the next day. My husband did the same the next night, and I
hate to say it, but I bailed on the third night because I was
too tired to follow through. We got the ''big boy bed'' with the
truck sheets and made the big deal about that. Didn't work. Our
plan now is to buy a gate and put it on his door and basically
let him cry it out at the gate on his doorway (in place of
crying in his crib), but am somewhat hesitant that it will be a
very abrupt switch. But maybe that is what it takes? We would
welcome any advice (except for letting him continue to sleep
with us because that doesn't work either. He kicks, so my
husband now sleeps on the pull-out couch... yes, it's gotten
that bad!) Gate vs no gate?, other techniques?
losing sleep
Hi:
We are just going through this same stage with our 27 month old
son. Prior to his newly developed climbing skills, he slept
through the night in his crib.
Here is our story: He started climbing out of crib in the middle
of the night and coming to our room, for the sake of ease we let
him stay in our bed. After 2- 3 nights of this we transitioned
to big boy bed...
This is what seems to be working for us (so far):
1) Big Boy bed is double bed
2) One of us lays down with him to read stories and sing songs,
when he is drowsy we leave the room.
3)First few nights he cried out for us in the middle of the
night, one of us went to his bed and laid next to him for 10-15
mins. This happened 2 or 3 nights.
4)For the past couple of weeks he has been sleeping through the
night again!!!
We still haven't cracked the code on getting our old routine of
napping back....he continues to leave the room...I may have to
turn to the ''gate and cry'' method for this.
Good Luck.
Mom of Boy in the Big Bed
We found that having the toddler bed right next to our bed is
helpful. We have just night weaned (our son is 2) him and this
has discouraged at least one of the nightly wakings. Most of
the time he stays in his bed but sometimes he gets into bed
with us. But it has taken a lot of pressure off to have the bed
to ourselves most of the time. Eventually we'll move him into
his room next door but for now we are taking ''baby-steps''.
I do have friends who use the babygate method for their toddler
and it seems to work for them.
juliette
Our son also began climbing out of his crib when we tried the
CIO method.
Desperate for sleep, we brought him into our bed....which at
first was a mistake. We were all waking each other up several
times during the night. So eventually I got smart. We now
sleep in the baby's room with our queen mattress and an extra
long twin side by side on the floor. So now we all sleep
together but have space. It's great because I do not have to
worry about him falling out of bed because it is on the floor.
If he needs comfort he is only an arm reach away. And we all
have room to move in our sleep without disturbing each other.
Plus we hope that when we are ready to have our room back it
will be an easier transition for him because we will be moving
out of HIS room; NOT he moving out of our room. Oh and the
cool thing is now our room is Hollywood size dressing room
where all the family dressers are kept as well as dirty
laundry. So it is like having an enormous size walk in
closet. :)
The Happy Family Bed
17-month-old refuses to sleep in crib
My 17 mo.old son has recently refused to sleep in his crib. It all began
a few months ago. He had been sleeping through the night until Feb. Since
then he has been waking earlier (4 am, 2 am, 11 pm) and we've been
bringing him into bed with us. Getting him to sleep for the night hadn't
been a problem until 2 weeks ago. Now the minute we try to put him in his
crib he tenses up and begins to wail. We are survivors of the Ferber
technique and have tried that too. His cries are just too heartbreaking
to ignore. To add to this, I just found out I am pregnant. Does anyone
have any advice/ suggestions on how to help us get our son to like his
crib again? Could this be separation anxiety? Is this just a phase?
Because he refuses his crib he ends up staying up much too late, sleeping
late in the am and has only one nap a day (1 hr). Any help would be much
appreciated!
To the mother whose son refused to sleep in his crib... My daughter suddenly decided one day that she didn't want to sleep in her crib. I think she was about 14 months old. One evening I looked up and she was standing in her doorway (God knows how she had gotten out of the crib and opened her door but there was a telltale bruise from some kind of crib-dive). After that, it was impossible to get her to stay in the crib. It was a few weeks later that she refused to drink out of a bottle and then a few weeks later refused to sit in a high chair.
My response: Let it happen. She's growing up. We immediately got her her
own twin bed (with a gate on the side) that she's been in ever since. We
announced that she could have her choice, the crib or the bed (never our bed, except for morning snuggling). At first she alternated but stuck to the bed eventually. I think she liked the fact that she had a choice in the matter. Sounds to me like he's growing up. Let him reject the baby stuff. It's good for him.
We have a 16 month old daughter. My wife nursed her for a year, and we
practiced family bed during that time. She would go to sleep in her crib, but refused to go back after a nighttime feeding. We finally found a solution that works for us. We took a mattress, and put it on the floor of her room. We found some pretty sheets and a cute comforter, and set out to develop a night-time ritual. First, we weened her of night feedings by having her sleep with me alone. It wasn't fun, but it only took 5 nights. Then I slept with her in her new bed for five nights. Each night we practiced a bedtime ritual of playing naked (her), putting on pj's, then reading books. The best part is being able to read to her in bed. She immediately took ownership of the space, and felt relaxed and would go to sleep after reading. Then we continued the ritual, and left her alone to fall asleep. We were prepared to apply the Ferber method, but didn't need to. The first night she cried for 6 minutes, the second for 2 minutes, the third for about 20 seconds, and now she pushes us out of bed so she can go to sleep. We leave her door open, and put up a swinging gate so she can't roam through the house. She awakens for time to time, but for the most part, sleep 10-1/2 hrs. a night. She has adopted her pillow as her security blanket. It's a dream! Good luck.
Our son, who is 13 months, also refused to sleep in his crib when he
was a newborn. He would sleep swaddled in his bouncy seat or in his
carseat. He began sleeping in his crib at about 4 months. He has
slept through the night in his crib since about 5 months. Based upon
our experience, I don't think you should be concerned that at 9 weeks
he hasn't taken to his crib. We too were worried that he never would
sleep in his crib. But, it just took a few months for him to get used
to being outside the uterus.
February 2002
Our 19-month old son usually goes right down to sleep in his crib or
cries for just a few minutes. A month ago, during a late night "I
want to get out and play" tantrum, he vaulted out of his crib and
landed on his back on the floor. His agility surprised and scared him
even more than us, so he did not do it again until a few days ago, in
an attempt to avoid his regular afternoon nap. We are concerned that
he will hurt himself if he makes a habit out of scaling (and then
falling from) the crib's side bars. We have thought about buying a
crib guard (a "roof" for the crib), but are not sure how he will react
to the increase in confinement. Any other thoughts on reducing his
desire to escape, or actually stymieing the attempts?
benjamin
I remember my daughter doing this at about the same age, except she did it
twice within a few minutes. She never spent the night in that crib again.
Either you lock them up with the crib "roof" or let them go, is what it boils
down to. We moved her into a portacrib that had higher sides for a month
(and it is low to the ground!), then into her own bed. I remember my mother
telling me that her parents fixed a screen door to the top of her brother's
crib.
anonymous
I started crawling out of my crib when I was 18 months old, at which time
my parents moved me to a bed. One side was against the wall, and they may
have put some padding on the floor at first in case I fell out, but as my
mother pointed out, once I had learned to get out of the crib, the crib
became much less safe than a bed. Aesthetically, I find the idea of
completely "caging" a kid in with bars on the top of the crib rather
unappealing.
Dianna
You may want to try having him sleep in a "sleeping bag" made for babies.
There's a company in SF that you can buy from online called Little Big
Foot. (They also sell them for a little less $ in One Step Ahead catalogs -
probably online as well.) It is basically a long bag with arm holes that keeps
the baby warm as well as disabling them from climbing out of the crib. Our
son sleeps in one and can stand up but cannot climb because he can't get his
legs that far apart. Good Luck & Safe Sleeping!
A. May
Well this isn't the advice you were asking for, but I would move him out of
the crib into the bed. We had to move our son when he was about 14 mos.
old because he started scaling the crib rails. We just felt the risk of injury
from a fall was not worth the worry keeping him in the crib would involve if
he continued to climb out. Instead of moving him into a twin bed, as we
would have done if he was older, we bought a toddler bed. It was pretty
cheap (under $100) and had rails on both sides about 2/3 of the length of the
bed so he wouldn't roll out, but it was only about 2 ft off the ground so when
he climbed out he couldn't hurt himself. We kept him in that until he was
quite good at climing into our bed on his own, and then he was moved to the
twin bed.
anonymous
Maybe your son is ready for a bed. Our 2 year old climbed out of her crib the
day after we brought her baby brother home from the hospital. That night
the crib mattress went on the floor, and the crib is being readied for her
baby brother - we are currently shopping for a bed for our daughter. If you
want to keep him in his room, you could put a gate on the door.
Anonymous
my daughter started vaulting out of the crib at this age too. unfortunately
in our case the hard landing did not scare her nor deter her from trying it
again and again. the desire to vault out the crib came hand in hand with
her personality so we knew if we tried to "cage" her in that the night time
process would get ugly (and she is part Houdini). so we switched her crib (it
was one of those Crib4Life models) to a toddler bed. it was somewhat of an
uphill battle to keep her in her bed (now at six she still crawls into bed
with
me at some point during the night) but at least i didn't lay around at night
listening for the big THUD. fortunately my second child never did this.
carrie s.
The general rule is: if your toddler is vaulting out of the crib, you need to
move him/her to a low bed. Once a toddler knows they can get out of the
crib, they will continue to do so, and it's unsafe to keep them there.
anonymous
Our son needed the Crib Tent from Tots in Mind for several years. It
attaches with velcro, and has a zipper to allow quick in-and-out. It also
collapses so you can take it on trips.
The zipper slide gets tucked into a pocket where the child SUPPOSEDLY
can't get to it. We had to safety pin the zipper into its pocket because our
son figured out a way to wiggle it free. For us, the main issue wasn't that he
was having a tantrum about being put down, but rather that we were
concerned he'd climb out in the middle of the night and get into something
dangerous.
Good luck.
Zach
When our son was a toddler he did the same thing: started climbing out
of the crib. I agree that it is not safe. We started leaving the
side down so he could just get out. Other parents we knew had the
same approach. They are too old to be contained in a crib and can be
moved to a regular child bed or left in the crib with the side down so
they can climb out safely. My son and now my granddaughter, both just
come into my bedroom if they get up at night or early in the morning.
Liz
When our 20-month old did the same, we bought a futon mattress and put
it on the floor. As for the crib "roof," our neice loved hers, but
not for long.p
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