Berkeley Parents Network: Naps for 2 & 3 Year Olds

Berkeley Parents Network

Naps for 2 & 3 Year Olds

Berkeley Parents Network > Advice > Sleep > Naps for 2 & 3 Year Olds

2 year-old's 4pm nap keeps him up late

May 2004

Over the past 3 months, my 2-yr old has stopped taking a nap. He used to nap between 12:30-1pm and wake up around 3pm.

Now, he refuses to nap and most times, because he is tired, falls asleep at 4pm. Then he wakes up at 6pm roaring to go and stays up until 11:30pm.

We realize it's a developmental stage, but it's wearing us down and it's not doing him much good either. We've tried all calming bedtime and naptime routines. We've read up on all the tricks---quiet time for 30 minutes, nothing seems to work. We've even made sure his diet his free of sugars (gummy treats, cookies, juice)during the day and night. Even tried waking him up earlier and breaking this cycle. Nothing works!

With a sleep schedule such as this, we often miss many of his needed daytime activities which he needs to get out his energy. Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks. lori

a non-napping two year old, my sympathies, you have. we had to endure this as well, and finally found that the late afternoon nap was not allowed - my child did have to build up stamina to weather the stress of not napping when he really needed to, but we pushed up bed time to 6:30 or 7. i kept my son awake by bathing him when he began to get drowsy around 4 and gave him dinner by 5 and distract, distract, distract until i was sure he would go to bed. the other thing we did do, was to institute quiet time with a timer - in his room or play area - building up from 5 mins to 30 mins. this down time at the time of his former nap, helped to restore him a bit and we got out and about to run around a little more. hope you find something that works for you. linda

2.5 yo is singing and jumping, not napping

April 2004

Help! My 2.5 year old is simply not napping for the past few days. We do our usual pre-nap routine and he lies down in his crib but after I leave he is up, singing, talking, jumping, and simply doesn't settle himself down to nap as he always has in the past. Could this just be a phase? He is definitely tired and I think he's too young to stop napping! Alma

My now almost-3 yo son did the exact same thing at when he was 2 1/2. My advice to you is to hang in there.

My son wasn't ready to give up his naps either but for some reason started resisting them last fall. He once went for an entire week without napping and I thought it was really over then, but the fact that he was an utter basket case in the late afternoons (and the fact that he collapsed in bed by 6:30) told me otherwise.

One thing that could help is to put your son down for his nap a little bit later. Move the nap time back by 15 minutes and see what happens. It could be that he can go a bit longer without napping and needs slightly less daytime sleep. My son will nap more consistently these days if I put him down around 2 pm (back when he was 2 1/ 2, his nap time was closer to 1 pm) and then I make sure he is up by 4 to protect his bedtime. These days, he misses one nap about every ten days.

Another thing is to not let your son know if you are upset that he doesn't nap. Don't yell, punish, nag, get mad, etc. If he knows he is pushing a sensitive button, he will definitely continue.

Hope this helps. Good luck! Been There

My daughter did the same at about 26 months. She just sang, jumped and talked for the whole time she suppose to nap. I usually took her out of her crib after 1,5 hours. She did manage to take a nap every once in a while ( around once a week). This whole phase lastet like about 1 months. I just sticked to the routine and now we are back to normal. I know there are some 2 year olds who give up napping but I could tell that my daughter still needed her nap. When she didn't nap she was grouchy in the evening or even fell asleep at the dinner table. If your child is happy all day and seem to be rested ( maybe he sleeps 12 hours straight at night ? ) than he is maybe giving up his nap. I heard that 12 hours of sleep is the minimum for that age. I would just stick to the routine and see if he goes back to normal. I do have a different problem know. She wants to nap 3 hours or more. These Toddlers change all the time. Good Luck ! Alex

We just went through this! It was really frustrating. My son is not ready to give up his nap and, frankly, I'm not ready either! When we moved him from a crib to a bed, he did great at first but after a few weeks he started really partying after we left the room. One day I heard a really loud noise during naptime and I went into his room. Although he jumped back in bed when he heard me open the door, he was wearing sunglasses. When I asked what was going on, he said ''Dancing, mama. A whole lot of dancing.''

I think the big thing for him was realizing that he could get out of bed and do whatever he wanted to do. So first we tried to limit it: we put a gate on his door to keep him from running into his brother's room and waking up the baby. We put hook- style locks on his bathroom door (he's still in diapers) and his closet door. What really did the trick, though, was bringing a crib back into his room. We told him that if he got out of bed, then we'd put him in the crib. He got out of bed a few times and we put him in the crib (he hated it!). The drama of it all seemed too much, so for about a week, we just ignored the bed at nap time and put him in the crib. After that week, we let him try the bed with the understanding that he'd go right back in the crib if he got out of bed. One last thing. We put some books on the nightstand and told him that he could read quietly if he didn't want to sleep, but he could NOT get out of bed until we came to get him.

I'm happy to report that he's stayed in his bed during nap and at night for the past few weeks. Some days he just reads quietly and some days he sleeps for almost 3 hours. Of course I'm happiest when he actually sleeps, but the rest is good downtime too. And at least the naptime partying has stopped (for now.) Good luck to you. I know it is a tough stage! Jen

My daughter went from taking a 3 hour nap a day to almost no nap at 2.5 years old. I, too, knew she still needed a nap and I tried everything I could to get her to nap including things I was not too proud of such as losing my temper. I was really going crazy at the thought of her naps ending, especially since she really needed one and we all paid for it later in the day. In the end, I had to accept that this was one thing I could not control and tried to get her to stay quietly in her room, which was not always possible. She did start going to bed a lot earlier - like 7 o'clock which was some consolation. I did find that when this first started she would go back to naps for a few weeks then stop again. Now, a year later, she may do quiet time for an hour or so, or not. And, every month or so she will take a 2 1/2 hour nap. Even if she doesn't nap or do quiet time, I have trained her to play on her own while I get things done for awhile every afternoon which is much easier at 3 1/2 than at 2 1/2. The only thing that really helped me was accepting that this break in my day was over and if I got more than that it was only upside. One last thought, I found potty training to be a similar challenge as only the child can control it no matter how much I wanted to:) Good Luck! Jenny

2.5 yo can't settle down at naptime

Feb 2004

As I write this, I am listening (via the monitor) to my 2.5 yo son sing and rattle around in his crib during naptime for the third time this week. Undoubtedly, this will all end with no nap and an early bedtime.

My son has always had very healthy sleep habits. He was always been a solid napper and has slept through the night since he was 7-8 months old. We have nap/sleep routines and he goes to sleep unassisted. I also have no doubt that he still NEEDS his naps. Today, for example, he yawned about four times while we were going through his pre-nap routine of reading books. And on the days when he misses his naps, he is fast asleep by 6:30 or 7 pm (as opposed to 8:30 or 9 pm when he does nap) and will sleep solidly until 7 the next morning.

There seems to be no rhyme or reason to his not napping -- whether he's been to preschool that morning or not; whether he's had an especially active morning or not; whether he's eaten a lot of lunch or not. He doesn't cry or scream, he justs sings and plays (and yawns) and basically energizes himself up to the point where he can't sleep.

I've tried carrots (''let's bake cookies when you wake up from your nap'') and sticks (''okay, we're not baking cookies anymore'') to no avail. I'm also trying not to make too big of a deal about it with him, since he seems to know what pushes my buttons.

Has anyone successfully gotten their preschooler to consistently settle down to take the naps he/she so desperately needs? I can't -- nor do I want to -- lie down with him (this would only energize him) since he still sleeps in a crib. Any success stories (and strategies/techniques) would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks, Rockridge mom

You're lucky your son sleeps well and doesn't mind just hanging out in the crib at ''naptime.'' Mine will flip out if we put her in the crib at ''naptime'' even if she's tired, but she will nap if she's tired enough and we put her on our bed or on blankets on the floor --but not for long. And if we move her after she's fallen asleep in the car, the nap is OVER for the day. But she sleeps great at nite.

My son, now 9, had completely given up naps by the time he was your child's age. If he took a nap, it was impossible to get him to sleep before 11 or 12 at night. The good news is that lots of bright kids are not great sleepers. It sound like your child is just past napping. The solution I used was to insist on a fairly quiet time - since you have success with a crib, which we did not, you could use that, and just let him play quietly there. Or choose some snuggle, or soft music, time, with very limited stimulation. Their little nervous systems get overloaded with all the new information they're trying to digest, and they need a little time out, but struggling with forcing sleep becomes more stressful than just riding the horse in the direction it's going, I've found. k

Sounds like you're at the transition phase between napping and not napping. Does it work for you and your schedule to let her skip the nap, and just go to bed earlier? Is she still happy and functional in the late afternoon if she doesn't nap? If so, you may just want to accept that her sleep pattern is (once again) changing. Another option might be a later nap, but that might mean a later bed time, too. Does this work better for you? Think about what you - and she - really need, and there's probably more than one way to get it! R.K.

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