Ending My 10-year-long Insomnia

I have had insomnia for the last 10 years. Before that I slept well throughout the night. For the past few years I have taken a variety of over the counter sleeping pills. I still wake up many times throughout the night, but because I am drugged I go back to sleep fairly easily. If I don't take anything it will take a long time to fall asleep. Then I cannot stay asleep for very long. I am really tired of feeling groggy in the morning and waking up so often. I don't think I have sleep apnea because I don't snore. I have never taken prescription sleeping pilss. I want to do something, anything, that will make me sleep like I used to. I am interested in a therapist, acupuncture, a sleep clinic, books... anything that will help me sleep through the night. My lack of sleep affects my life. I really want to spend the summer working on changing things. Does anybody have recommendations of who I can see or something I can do? -Desperate for a good night sleep

I think I suffer from 'learned' insomnia

I think I suffer from 'learned' insomnia. Every once in awhile (maybe once or twice a year), an incident occurs that keeps me from sleeping that night.

It's usually not that big a deal - sometimes it's an argument I had with someone that day, or, even more inconsequentially, it's just that something 'big' is happening the next day where I feel I need a real full night's sleep (like, a wedding I'm in, a family trip, etc). The next day, the issue that kept me up might be resolved. However, I still worry about sleeping. My thinking goes something like, ''OK, I hardly slept last night, so I *must* sleep tonight, or else I'll feel absolutely sleep-deprived and terrible''.

I freak myself out to the point that I don't sleep well that night, either. Often, I sleep even worse than my initial night of insomnia. The next day, I'm even more tired and out of it, and even more worried about getting sleep. And the cycle keeps repeating, often for a couple of weeks or even a month. (During my longer bouts, I will sometimes get a prescription for Ambien from my doctor; however, I would rather not take a sleeping pill.)

I've looked through the archives for past advice, and I noticed a lot of people mentioning undiagnosed depression. I'm pretty sure that I'm not depressed; I feel happy with myself and my life. However I can often become depressed if my insomnia continues for days on end. I'm thinking that hypnotherapy or guided relaxation or something of that nature might help with my form of insomnia. I'd like to learn some techniques that I can employ when my sleeplessness strikes, so I don't have nights and nights of not sleeping unless I pop an Ambien. Any recommendations for a quality hypnotherapist, or even a book to check out? I'm also willing to try other methods that might work (acupuncture? etc.). Insomniac

That aside, your point is well taken - you have anxiety about your sleep which makes you loose sleep. If your doc is so willing to prescribe sleep meds, he should also be willing to give you a referral for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) which is very effective for this sort of insomnia and a few visits to a therapist will likely give you strategies to address your anxieties when it repeats in the future.

Since your issue is very mild, short lived, if you're skilled in literature searches, you might be able to read up on the various strategies CBT promotes for improved sleep.

Make sure, too, that you address the obvious - do you have good sleep habits: no tv, reading, etc right before bed. Good sleep environment. Maintain a consistent sleep schedule (weekends and weekdays). Avoid caffeine. And, it's really an anxiety problem not sleep problem directly - so be sure you're dealing with other anxieties in your life, including this, in a healthy way - exercise, positive social influences, etc. Sleep pro

I have had success with acupuncture to break the frustrating insomnia cycle. Occasionally I start the cycle again but I just go back for another session of acupunture & the cycle is stopped. I can highly recommend acupuncturist Joseph Carter. He is a calming, caring person & the acupuncture has been amazingly effective for me. Even before I had the insomnia problem, I went to Joseph Carter for gynecological issues & I'm convinced Joseph Carter's care is part of why I have a happy, healthy baby to keep me awake at nights. You can reach Joseph at 510-524-4151 or acudude@comcast.net. Good luck & sweet dreams! a Well-Rested Mom

Difficulty staying asleep at night

I have trouble staying asleep at night. I can fall asleep asleep easily, but then in the middle of the night (around 3AM), I wake up and cannot go back to sleep until about 5AM when it is time to get up! This is very annoying because I feel sleepy during the day, at work (meaning I don't get enough sleep). This has been going on for a while now and I would like to kick out this bad habit. I don't want to use sleep pills. Do you have some good remedy that could help me sleep through the night (herbs, tea, etc.)? Thanks for your advice. Sleepy

1. I listen to books on tape when I am falling asleep. I always have a large supply of books to listen to and a walkman at the ready. I realized that when I was trying to fall asleep and when I woke up in the middle of the night my mind was racing about things that are going on or that need to be done and it was keeping me awake. The book takes your mind off of things that may be going on in your life. It may sound strange, but it works for me! When I first started this ritual I would usually get through one side of a tape sometimes more. Now it only takes about 5 minutes before I fall asleep. You can buy books on CD too. These kind of books are a little expensive, but you can buy them used on the internet for a lot less. Then you can return the ones that you have already listened to.

2. I sleep with eye shades (a sleeping mask). When I first started using them I lived in an apartment that had a street lamp directly outside my bedroom window. I realized that the light was making it difficult for me to fall asleep. Now I use them because when I do wake up in the middle of the night my mind wakes, but my eyes remain closed. That somehow makes it easier to go back to sleep.

Ok, sleeping mask and headphones probably don't make a pretty picture, but you won't care when you start sleeping really well and falling easily back to sleep when you wake up in the night. Good luck! Anon

My husband's insomnia is really impacting his life

My husband has never been a good sleeper, but lately he's been troubled by insomnia, and for the last week or so it's been so bad that it's really impacting his life -- he says he feels as if his brain is in a fog. He tried sleeping pills (Ambien) for a long time, but they've stopped working. I want to help him explore alternative therapies and approaches, and I'd like some advice about where to start. I've heard that some things that can help are relaxation techniques, massage, and cognitive behavioral therapy, and I'm sure there are other approaches too. I'm not sure exactly where to begin to find help for my husband. Should he start by seeing his doctor (who would probably just prescribe another pill, which is not what I think he needs), or a sleep consultant (if there is such a thing)? Or a cognitive therapist? Any advice or recommendations of practitioners in the area (we live in Berkeley) would be much appreciated! Eager to help my husband sleep

He wont be able to see a real ''sleep consultant'' without a referal from his doctor. You maybe thinking of a sleep study which is done at sleep labs, but they typically aren't going to record sleep for potential insomnia unless they think there is some other sleep disturbance that might be showing up as insomnia, unlikely. One reason that a sleep study (in which they basically record sleep in a laboratory for a night or two) could be helpful is to demonstrate that he's actually getting more sleep than he thinks he is. This is not uncommon and that information alone can ease the anxiety that he is getting insufficient sleep.

I recommend two routes simultaneously:

1) Push the doctor more. Go in educated. It is possible that other meds will work better and it might be a worthwhile temporary solution that you can phase out as you start the behavioral solutions below. You could also request a referal to specialist (psychologist or sleep specialist) who knows cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia.

2) Underlying CBT for insomnia is practicing good sleep hygene. These include things like - never watch tv, read, or anything in bed other than sleep and sex. Don't watch or read anything at the end of the day that will heighten your anxiety (i.e, watching the evening news!). Go to bed sleepy but not exhausted. Etc. Of course easing other underlying anxiety is key. It's worth seeing a specialist who can give a very thorough plan of attack.

Your doctor should know who to refer you to. There are sleep clinics in Alameda, at UCSF, and the top one is at Stanford. There are many options for the CBT.

Good luck. Sleep Pro

We have had the same problems with insomnia! I say ''we'' because his waking up at 4:30am and not being able to go back to sleep has affected both of us. For him, he is obviously exhausted and drained, getting by on sometimes only 4-5 hrs of interupted sleep. For me, I start becoming annoyed with him for needing to nap on the weekends and constantly complaining of being tired. Then I feel bad for him also because he obviously can't help it.

He finally went to Kaiser, and the NP just prescribed an anti-anxiety/sleep aid. He went in, asking for accupuncture because our friend really recommended it. Well, Kaiser only will let you do accupuncture for pain relief. Which is so frustrating because it is quite expensive - about $75-100 per session.

The medication she prescribed didn't help much , other than leaving him a bit groggy in the morning.

We know that he needs to be able to handle work stress better because that is the main cause of his sleep problems. However, he has always been a light sleeper, and seems to require fewer hours than, let's say, I do at 8 hrs a night! If the dog barks or the kids have a nightmare in the middle of the night, he has trouble falling back asleep. The weekend late afternoon naps probably don't help his cycles, either.

If anyone knows of any herbal remedies, or an accupuncturist (we will pay out of pocket at this point!)...please help!

I feel your pain....hopefully we will both have happier, better rested husbands in the near future! --tired of his being tired

Seeking help for anxiety-related insomnia

I have had terrible insomnia for years, always triggered by anxiety and the long and stressful to-do list of juggling motherhood, a demanding career, and everything else. I've been relying on drugs to help me sleep and would like to look at other options. I'm hoping there are therapists out there who can work with someone like me on relaxation techniques, as well as talking through the things causing the anxiety. Recommendations? Tired of feeling tired

Some of these worked a bit, or for a while, but nothing resolved the situation. I heard along the way that insomnia is frequently a symptom of depression, but I didn't want to take anti-depressants -- I was convinced that I wan't depressed! I tried them a couple of times -- and voila!! -- my insomnia went away, but because I didn't want to be taking anti-depressants I never stayed on them and the insomnia and anxiety came back.

Finally, after six years, I gave in and stayed on an anti-depressant. It has been ever so much better for me, not to mention for my daughters and husband. There are excellent anti-depressants now, with minimal or no side-effects, and some work well for anxiety/insomnia. Maybe it's not a ''perfect'' solution, but for me it's a whole lot better than not sleeping and the pain of worrying constantly and excessively. It also makes any therapy you decide to do more effective, as therapy also takes energy and if you're exhausted, it's hard to make it work for you.

Once I was on the anti-depressant for a few months, by the way, it was easy to wean myself from the sleep medications. I rarely need sleep medication now -- perhaps a couple of times a year when I'm exceptionally stressed.

You may not need an anti-depressant. However, from your description, I'd highly reccommend getting an evaluation from a medical professional to see if this might be an appropriate solution for you. In my case, I'm so glad I did, as is the rest of my family. Sleeping Mom

My boyfriend can't sleep, is getting depressed

My BF (age 32) has always had an extremely difficult time falling asleep and has been using alcohol to facilitate sleeping. He is often up until 3:00 a.m., drinking/thinking and then gets up at 7:00 a.m. to go to work. When work is stressful, he may even be up later obsessing. He can't seem to turn off his head and is getting more depressed. He has agreed to see a therapist and I am looking for a recommendation for probably a male therapist, preferably around Oakland, with evening hours. Thanks

''Klonopin'' comes to mind: it helps users to turn off their brain before bed so that they get a restful sleep.

Of course you'll need a therapist to prescribe the medication, and I don't know any I'd necessarily recommend.

In any case, having difficulty winding down at night due to racing thoughts seems to be a common problem, and a low-dose medication can often help -- in addition to cognitive behavioral therapy and/or changes in night-time routine. anon

Insomnia relief

I have had insomnia issues through much of my life (as do many of my family members) and recently this problem has been exacerbated by the stresses of a move, new job, big life changes--stress. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to alleviate this? I get good exercise, do not partake of caffeine, and, when sleepless, get up and do something until I am tired again. I also keep pretty regular hours. I am afraid to take sleeping pills because I am very sensitive to drugs and cannot afford to wake up groggy. But if anyone can suggest a mild sleeping pill or possibly a gentle homeopathic sleeping aid, I'd be interested to hear about it. Thanks! Tired

One issue that I learned (from my reading) is that you have to accurately assess how much sleep you really need and only try to sleep for that long. If you regularly need 7 hours of sleep but are in bed from 10-6 over time your sleep will become disrupted/disjointed and will deteriorate seriously... this has been tested.

Another helpful tip is to keep a sleep journal for a few months keeping track of your sleep as well as any issues that you think might be effecting it such as stress at work, sporadic exercise, diet, etc. In doing this I discovered that my insomnia was partly caused by monthly hormonal cycles.

For a mild sleeping pill, try melatonin. Both my mom and I have recently tried and found it works well. My doctor said it was fine to use and it has been tested in double-blind studies in Germany and found to be safe. I take a low dosage (.5 mg) when I'm really have problems and at least at that level it feels pretty natural and is very helpful. Good luck. roxanne

Time to do something about my insomnia

So the baby is sleeping great, but I've decided it's finally time to do something about the fact that I'm not. I've been an insomniac since I was about 8 years old and I want to know about serious solutions. Please-- no folk remedies, I've tried 'em all. I'm interested in taking things up a notch. I've heard about sleep centers that diagnose problems, but I'm also curious to hear about other things. Medications? A little gentle brain surgery? Bring on the big guns! Thanks for your help. sleepy

Husband has insomnia

My husband has recurring problems with insomnia. It goes away and then returns with no predictable pattern. Work stress doesn't always bring it on, and exercise doesn't seem to help stave it off. Sometimes he'll be really tired, will go to sleep for 20 minutes at bedtime, then wake up unable to go back to sleep for several hours. He has tried Ambien (an MD's prescription) which usually--but not always--helps him sleep but he feels groggy in the morning. Do any of you have experience with alternative medicine and sleep? Any other techniques? We have 3 kids and it's hard to keep the house quiet so he can sleep in the afternoons when he hasn't slept all night... Thanks for your advice!