Panic attacks during 3rd trimester

Does anyone else have experience with panic attacks during their pregnancy? I started getting them my 2nd trimester, when I was using my albuterol asthma inhaler. I promptly stopped using my inhaler, but they started coming back in my third trimester. My husband and I are very happy to be expecting our first daughter, so I'm not sure why this is happening to me. Anyone else experience these during pregnancy or know how to prevent them? anon

Pregnant with second and worried about everything

I am about 14 weeks pregnant with my second pregnancy, and I feel like I am falling apart. We have a 3 yr old child whom I love passionately, but who has been since birth a challenging, let's say ''spirited'' child for me. I was ambivalent about whether I wanted/could handle a second, but when I got pregnant (not entirely planned) this time, we decided to keep it, and now I am worried I made the wrong choice. This late in the pregnancy, abortion no longer seems an option. But I worry about everything: the sleeplessness, the financial burdens, the exhaustion, the logistics, the balancing work/family (I work a fairly challenging job and will not be able to take much leave time this time around), all the baby stuff again, all the toddler tantrums and discipline battles again, the impact on our son, on my marriage, etc. It seems most nights and many days I just cry all night long. I had been hoping that maybe this baby would be a girl -- i think I imagined that a girl would be less challenging, or more different, from my spirited little boy -- but we've just learned that it's another boy. When I've seen him on the ultrasound, I just feel nothing -- so different from the excitement and anticipation with my first. I have a good therapist, but but I would really value help from people who have been there -- how do you come to terms with the fact that you are carrying a child you maybe don't want? How do I get over these worries?
thanks for the help

Now that I am deep in the muck of newborn madness, here's what I have to say... remember how in love you felt when your first was born? Believe it or not, you will fall that in love all over again with your second. At least for me, my lack of enthusiam during the pregnancy (which also had me freaked out) was based completely on my worrying, now that I look back on it. And that love is separate from - and does not touch - the love you have for your first. My toddler has taken the birth of his baby brother surprisingly well, although he is admittedly a bit insecure and clingy lately. Basically, my strategy in dealing with both of them is to have the newborn strapped in a sling on top of me 24/7 and give my toddler all of my mental attention. So far, its working well.

As for the baby exhaustion. On the one hand, yes, not sleeping. Sucks. On the other hand, second baby is WAY easier to take care of. You know what you are doing. At least for me, I am surprised at how easily I take his cries and fusses in stride. They aren't the panic-inducing anxiety they were the first time. I know how to hold him, feed him, burp him, etc.

So, in the end, its been not only doable, but surprisingly tender and deeply joyous. And again, this is coming from someone who was totally freaking out her entire pregnancy (and was hoping for a girl) with the kinds of worries you mention.

You will be fine. So will your family. Mom of Two Boys

Once she was born, all considerations of not wanting her became a distant memory. My hormones made me feel about her the same I'd felt about my firstborn.

I won't kid you around, however. Having two children is MUCH more difficult than one. But you learn to manage, the second one becomes easier with age, as they grow the two of them play together, and also you realize you can't be the perfect mother you were to one, and stop trying - which makes it easier.

good luck! anon

I was pregnant with our second son after having had three miscarriages. I was certain that a healthy pregnancy would be the only thing to make me get over my depression - surely caused by the miscarriages, I thought. Well, when at last I was keeping a pregnancy I got very freaked out by it. I panicked about all of the things you mentioned - sleeplessness, the financial burdens, the exhaustion, the logistics, the balancing work/family all the baby stuff again, all the toddler tantrums and discipline battles again, the impact on our son, on my marriage, etc. As it turns out I was having severe anxiety and panic attacks. Having never experienced them before I just felt sad, out of whack and, well, extermelely panicky and anxious.

I got help with how to handle anxiety from a therapist friend. I got chiropractic care for my aching back. I got free time away from my 3 year old when I could. And, I practiced prenatal yoga weekly in a studio and nightly at home. I did finally come around and began looking forward to the birth of the baby, but it was a scary time while it was happening.

I wish you well. I hope you can emerge from this with joy and anticipation! Remember, most of the things that you fear are short-lived and very manageable if you are psychologically well.

Take good care. Anon.

I feel so bad for yoU! I am in sort of a similar position, in that I have a very active 2.75 y.o. boy and am now 11 weeks pregnant and really hoping for a girl! I, too, was ambivalent about whether or not to even GET pregnant again and it wasn't until a week ago at my first pre-natal that I got even a LITTLE bit excited. Up till then, I'd been so sick, I really thought about terminating. The thing is, I have been on anti- ansiety/depressant meds since my son was 1 year old, and going off of the Paxil has been a nightmare. ANd it brings up the question as to whether I can even handle a second child. I just think 1.) don't worry about things that aren't happening yet (and worrying when they DO happen won't help either) and 2.) it's REALLY OK to not be happy / excited yet about this pregnancy. Some moms aren't until well after the baby is born. If the sadness continues after THAT, then maybe meds are necessary, but it's ok to be scared and freaked out. Anyway, give yourself a break; you don't have to be skipping with joy about this pregnancy, but also, after the first trimester your serotonin levels will go up and you may feel much better.

Good luck and E me if you'd like to commiserate further. namastesf

However, once our second was born, things slowly started getting better. For starters, I felt that n2 was a lot less of an ''earthquake'' in our lives: we were both very much prepared for all the demands of an infant. I also felt a lot more relaxed mothering n.2, and I think that had a positive effect on the whole family. Our 2nd son was just a friendly soul and he gained our hurts in a few months. I remember my husband once saying how amazing our 2nd son is and how scary the thought was of having considered ending the pregnancy. So, I had a very hard time during pregnancy, but, when the baby was born, things were not half as bad as I had imagined. This is just my story: we are SO happy we had our son, our children are what we most cherish in our lives (even with the challenging parts of being a parent!). Happy mommy of 2

My first child is a very spirited child and I was overwhelmed by her, and sill am at times. As a first time parent it is hard to imagine that another child will not be similar, but anyone with more than one child will tell you that they are all so different. Chances are your next baby will be nothing like your first. Also, your next baby is going to have to be adaptable because baby one is already here and is running the show! My second child is polar opposite from my first--they are nothing alike. It was so much easier the second time. They are both girls too.

As I read your post my gut feeling is that something else is going on. I wonder if there are unresolved feelings about your life, childhood, or whatever it may be, that are all coming out during this vulnerable time.

I would like to suggest that you explore this more before your baby comes, because as you know this depression is likely to increase during postpardum if not looked into. I would like to give you a resource that was so helpful to a friend of mine in a similar situation. I think it is important to have a therapist who deals very specifically with these issues-- pregnancy, birth, and motherhood. Phyllis Klaus is a therapist who deals with your exact issues, she is accomplished and experienced--you can search her name on the web and read about her. I have known more than one friend that has seen her, and they all agree that she was so easy to talk to, wonderful, and helped them with similar struggles.

Even if you like your therapist, you may get a lot more out of meeting with someone who will address the specifics. You have the right to enjoy this pregnancy and second baby experience, so please do what you need to do to take care of yourself.

Best to you and your family.
Just another mom that cares.

Panic attacks and seizures during pregnancy, considering abortion