How soon can I give my 3-week-old a bottle of breastmilk?

I just had a baby, three weeks ago, and am in that sleep deprived, completely incoherent state--seems like making complete sentences is a challenge. Trying to sort through all the advice in parenting/baby books is too overwhelming--so I need help! When can I start pumping milk and feeding my baby with bottles? I'm really desperate to have my husband do one feeding a night so I can sleep for 3-4 hours. I can't deal with the sleep deprivation--feel like I' mgoing to go crazy. How do people do this? I'm irritable, impatient, frustrated, and feel like I can't enjoy my baby. Not the blissful time I'd hoped for. So what's the deal with bottles? Any advice on this much appreciated--what kind of bottles to buy, what kind of nipples, pumping--when? how often? how much? There's just too much information in some ways, takes too much energy and mental focus to sort through right now. sleep deprived and wanting bottles

I had to supplement w/formula due to lack of sufficient milk supply (had previous breast reduction surgery). With both my babies, I waited at least 6 weeks before introducing a bottle and that seemed to be a good time. Doctor recommended this, and it worked well. The baby was used to breastfeeding by then, so went from breast to bottle without much of a problem. It was a long, difficult 6 weeks both times (the first was the hardest though) especially since I had to use an SNS - a contraption with a tube that I had to tape to my breast so the baby got additional formula along with my milk. But the wait was worthwhile. I came to enjoy nursing baby, especially when I was not so tired. Another thing that helped was I would sleep with baby and nurse while laying down at night, so at least I could rest.

I used Advent bottles (and still do for my 1.5 yr. old). They are supposedly good for the breast-bottle transition. I have always been happy with these, and never felt the need to try anything else.

Good luck to you, and remember, it does get eaisier. Try not to put too much pressure on yourself to be supermom, and most of all, follow your instincts. The best thing I did was to not read too many books. Some other new moms I know read so many books and were so ''confused'' about what they were supposed to do, that they became depressed and distracted so didn't get to enjoy just having a baby in their arms.

As for when your baby can take a bottle, it is when breast feeding is ''well-established''. Again, this is different for every mom and baby. I will tell you my tale: our baby took a bottle of formula at 2 and 3 days old because she had lost too much weight before my milk came in. At that tender age, she went back and forth between the bottle and breast just fine. So I pumped when she was 2 to 4 weeks old so my husband could give her a bottle/day. She continued to go between breast and bottle fine. Then, we stopped giving her a bottle at about 4 or 5 weeks of age because she seemed to have become a lazy latcher on the breast. When the issue did not cure itself after three weeks w/o a bottle, I saw a lactation consultant who helped me fix the problem, which turned out NOT to be related to bottles. So I promptly started pumping again once/day (and was getting far m! ore milk than earlier) but then, our daughter refuesed the bottle! She did take it from my aunt (whom she had never met before), but would not take it from my husband or me. We finally tricked her by having her sit in a bouncy seat facing Baby Mozart DVD and reached around from behind her and stuck bottle in her mouth. This worked well enough and in a short time, we could feed her the bottle in her bouncy chair regardless of whether she could see us or not. However, she still wouldn't take it from us in our lap. To spare you the rest of the details, our baby is now almost 4 mos. old and has regressed a bit on the bottle and now acts as if she doesn't know how to suck the milk from it. So my advice to you is to give your baby a bottle now (assuming you are having no latching problems w/ the breast) and if she goes back and forth between the bottle and breast okay for a couple/three days, t! hen keep at it--don't stop using the bottle (at least a couple times/week), lest your baby be like ours and refuse/forget how to use it.

The Avent bottles with the newborn nipple work for many babies, as does the Dr. Brown bottles.

As for how much pumping and when: most women produce the most milk in the wee hours, like from 1 to 5 a.m., so pumping in the morning is good. Pump mid-way between feedings. And if you want to give only one bottle a day, you need to only pump once/day (assuming you pump enough for a feeding). Hang in there--things WILL get better! Best of luck.

Try to nap whenever possible and learn to breastfeed lying down so that when baby nurses at night you can doze or even go back to sleep. Good luck and hang in there! You should start feeling better but if you don't, go see your doctor and make sure you don't have postpartum depression.

You should start giving your baby bottle at least once a day NOW. I cannot emphasize this enough-- I have many girlfriends with babies who end up refusing the bottle because they waited too long to introduce it or were not consistent in giving it EVERY DAY. Babies who are introduced to the bottle later may refuse, but at 3 weeks are usually pretty accepting. If you stop the bottle for a week while on vacation, don't be surprised if your baby refuses the bottle when you come back, never to take one again. I don't mean to be over-dramatic, but having a baby who does not take a bottle means you do not get a break as long as you are nursing... so it's worth it to make sure your baby learns.

You will probably get lots of advice about bottles and nipples, and the variety out there is mind-numbing, but I recommend the Playtex nurser system. We started out with Avent bottles because they seem to be the ''in'' thing these days, but we disliked them because they are so thick it takes a LONG time to warm a bottle up if you're warming stored breastmilk (I guess if you're doing formula you can just add warm water). Five minutes in a warm water bath is a long time to wait if you're dealing with a screaming, hungry baby. We switched to the Playtex nurser system with the ''drop in'' disposable plastic bags and have found them to be incredibly easy -- no bottle to wash, and the bags are so thin that they heat in about 40 seconds when placed in a hot water bath. You can buy a ''starter kit'' which comes with about 6 different types of nipples as well as the 4 and 8 ounce bottles and bags, and experiment with which nipple works best for your baby. Our baby was not picky about the nipple, but we found the silicone slow nipples to be our favorite.

Not a huge amount of uninterrupted sleep, but much better than I had been getting.

Starting the bottle actually helped my son, who had trouble learning to nurse, to do a much better, more efficient job (went from taking 45 minutes to nurse to doing it in 15 minutes).

We had purchased Avent before their birth and then had to just try out which other nipples were going to work best. Also, we found that it has been a real benefit for everyone for my partner to feed the babies as well.

I could go on and on - please feel free to contact me - I would really love to tak with you if you are interested. I wish I would have had someone to give me useful advice when I was desperate for sleep. When you're this tired, it's just too hard sorting through heaps of info.

And the sleep deprivation gets much better... along with the rewards of parenthood. Hang in there!

As to your other question-how to survive-here are a couple of my quick points of advice (as a mama of a 5 month old):

1-This too shall pass. Remember that and perhaps adopt it as a mantra. By 6 weeks your baby will probably get the whole night/day thing down, and start sleeping in longer chunks. All of the sudden it will be 1/2 a year later and you will have virtually no memory of this time.

2-Get out of the house. Sounds counterintuitive, but I found that even if I had only slept for an hour, a walk and fresh air really helped my mental heath.

3-Get help. Can Mom or friends bring food? Can you hire a housecleaner for a couple months? If not, get takeout and eat on paper plates. Do laundry only, make hubby pick up around the house and thats it for now.

4-Limit visitors. They always come when the baby is sleeping, keep you awake, then leave just as baby is waking up. I! f you can't keep them away, feel free to say ''it was so great to see you but I have to go lay down''.

5-When the baby is sleeping, at least lay down. I had trouble with napping during the day, but you must force yourself to at least lay down while the baby sleeps. Give up TV, movies, books and anything else for a while. Lay down.

6-Nurse in bed or find some other way to sleep and nurse at the same time. If you are a family bedder, you know how to do this, but if not, and I'm not, find some way to be able to scoop the baby up, nurse and be back asleep in seconds. I spent many nights asleep in the glider with baby in my arms on the Boppy. A Co-sleeper would be even better. This will really help! Either that or get dad to get up, get baby, change if needed and deliver to you for nursing.

Sometimes if I was so tired I was going to cry, my husband would go sleep with the baby ! in another room so that I could get really solid sleep without constantly hearing/looking at the baby right next to me.

7-Sometime in the next few weeks, join a mom's group. Comisseration does wonders for the psyche somehow and the support is really, really crucial.

This is a wild time, but one that in retrospect you will cherish as a sleepy, tender time with your baby. Your baby will never be this little again-hold her (or him), smell her, kiss her and do all of this laying down in the ready to sleep position. Good luck to you-and remember this too shall pass!

So, long story short, my daughter has been doing fine receiving both the breast and the bottle. It is better for you to give your child a bottle and get adequate rest then be unhappy and discouraged with your experience. Additionally, without enough rest you stand the chance of depleting your milk supply. You can discuss this with your pediatrician, but I can attest that I am not having any problems with providing both.

And as far as pumping is concerned-- I usually pump sometime while my husband is feeding the baby in the morning (using the Medela system--which is great). If you want to skip a night feeding-- I'd suggest pumping before you go to bed to prevent waking up engorged. If you want any more detailed advice, I'd be happy to talk to you about it.

4 week old can't get milk out of bottle

My baby is one month and I am trying to introduce a bottle with breast milk in it. She happily sucks on the bottle but she is unable to get any milk out. I am using Avent bottles with the 1 month nipple on it. Any suggestions? new mom

Breastfed 11-week-old spits out the bottle and cries

Following the advice of every doctor and baby book out there, I have exclusively breastfed my baby from the day he was born. He is now 11 weeks old and I want him to start taking the bottle so that I can return to work. I've tried a number of times but each time, he spits out the bottle nipple and cries when I try to put it back into his mouth. It is still filled with breastmilk so I don't think it's a taste issue. I've tried both Medela and Dr. Brown bottles without success. Is there a trick to getting him to feed from a bottle? Help!

[Editor note: see Gross tasting frozen breastmilk

Bottle for breastfed 11-week-old

My partner has started pumping so we can start our 11 week old daughter taking a bottle in preparation for her going back to work. The first time she took the bottle like a champ at about 8 weeks, but ever since then she has been pretty resistant to it. She at best just does nothing when I put the nipple in her mouth and more likely cries and cries. We have tried many things and are looking for suggestions. The only thing that has worked once was when my pertner slipped the bottle in after she had been breastfeeding a few minutes. Thanks

11-week-old refusing to take bottle of expressed milk

Hi My 11 week old girl refuses to take a bottle of expressed milk. I have been trying to get her to take the bottle since 6 weeks and we're actually regressing instead of making progress! I've tried Avent bottles, Dr. Brown's, Playtex original nurser, Nuk, and really small Gerber nipples. She would take the milk from Dr. Brown's if I gave it to her asleep but that doesn't even work anymore. We've tried heating up the nipple, having my husband, mom, neighbor, give her the bottle, we've tried when she's hungry, when she's not hungry, and NOTHING is working. I have to go back to work in 4 weeks and am really stressing out about this. Any other ideas???? I'm open to trying anything! Thanks so much, I keep kicking myself thinking I should have tried the bottle on her earlier! Stephanie

this got the baby used to getting milk from a different source, and he was already comfortable sucking on a finger. we moved from there to bottled breast milk without too much trouble. in our case, because our baby had some physical problems, we used a nipple that had a faster flow than might otherwise have been used for a child his age. this doesn't sound necessary for you. if you want to try the tube-on-finger route, most lactation consultants, and many dulas, can help you get started. the tube and bag can also be affixed to the caregivers body in such a way that a nursing position can be achieved for the baby, but that may backfire. as a previous poster said, it's good for the baby to know ''mommy=nursing, everybody else= bottle (or tube)'' t. adams

3 month old is suddenly refusing the bottle

My son is 3 months old and breast fed. We introduced him to a periodic bottle of breast milk starting at 6 weeks old and everything was fine until about 1 week ago when he suddenly decided that he didn't like the bottle from me or my husband. I have switched nipples with no luck. It was suggested that I try a different bottle altogether. I would welcome input from anyone who has gone through this and overcome it. I am returning to work at the end of January and I am stressed that he will cry all day at day care refusing the bottle amf

It's so hard, I know! I started giving my son one bottle of pumped milk a day from the time he was a few weeks old because I wanted to prepare him for when I had to go back to work at 3 months. He took it like a pro right from the beginning and was perfectly happy with it every day, right up till a week before I went back to work. (Just about 3 months old). Then he started refusing it and fussing every time we offered it. I was very stressed because I didn't have a choice about going back to work.

He had some trouble the first week I was back, but while I was at work, his caregivers kept offering it, and he drank some milk each day for the first week (not as much as I would have liked), and over the next few weeks he got less fussy and drank more. So, if you can think of this as normal development where he has started to be more discriminating and is expressing a preference for the breast, it might make you feel better. AND knowing that he won't starve while you're at work, and especially if he took the bottle before, he'll take it again if you and his care givers are patient.

Good luck. I know how hard it is to go back to work. It's nice that you still have a little time--keep offering the bottle every day, but don't stress too much if he doesn't take it. Been in your shoes!

We basically did bottle-training boot camp before I went back to work at 3 mos. and it wasn't what I'd call fun, but she did get it and was fine after that. The trying different bottles/ nipples is good advice: My daughter transitioned with the playtex nipple (I think it's bigger and softer than some others) and then we switched to the Avent once she was really good. I also ordered this expensive (`$18) ''breast-bottle'' off the web which is designed to look and feel more like a breast. My babies were not impressed, but maybe yours would like it.

Another friend of mine said she pumped and left the house for the day and her husband got their baby to take the bottle. Sometimes they won't take it from mom but will take it from dad or someone else.

Good luck! Naomi

Baby refusing bottle with breastmilk

Hello! I'm currently experiencing a difficult situation and wondered if anyone has advice. I currently breastfeed my baby girl. When I leave to work for a few hours or to take a class or just get out...I leave a bottle or two of pumped milk with her and her dad. She did fine the first three or four times but since then has refused to drink from a bottle. Any ideas? Should I change the bottle type? Nipple type? Keep trying until she gets it? I don't leave too long so she's not starving but...she goes a good 2 or 3 hours sometimes without drinking. And I'd rather she did. Thanks!

Well, here are the things that worked for us - 1) I fed her a bottle first thing in the morning when she was hungry and half asleep. I did this for a few days - to a week, just trying to establish the bottle habit. She would take the bottle this way, but only an ounce or two.

2) On the advice of a friend I changed bottles from Avent system to Evenflo. The Evenflo nipple is shorter and apparently more breast-like. She did seem to like this bottle a bit better, but still wouldn't really take the bottle.

3) I bought a bottle warmer and warmed the milk warmer than I actually thought was necessary. She seems to like it better this way.

4) I put her in her infant car seat or bouncer seat and fed her the bottle without touching her. THIS REALLY WORKED!

I can now leave the house without worrying about her feeding schedule. Her care- giver plops her in one of the seats and gives her the bottle. She now coos and smiles through the feedings. I still don't think she is drinking quite as much as when I breastfeed her. She will take 4 oz. max. But she will also take a subsequent feeding by bottle, if necessary. And when I return she just seems to nurse a bit longer and harder which helps keep up milk supply anyway.

Anyway, I hope this helps! I definitely know how frustrating this can seem. Good Luck!

Finally, we switched her daycare, and they suggested that we try soy formula, only during the day while she's drinking from a bottle. I was torn, because I'd hoped to keep her on just breast milk for several more months (she is 6 mos). We went ahead and tried it, and she drank several bottles of milk that day and since.

I wouldn't switch to formula right away - I'd do all the things you suggested - try a different bottle, a different nipple. Our daughter won't *touch* a silicone nipple - only rubber. Try glass instead of plastic. Try holding her differently. Try offering the bottle every 20 minutes or so... But then if all else fails, do a formula test. Good luck! cate

Our daughter is 18 months now, and I no longer need to spoon feed milk to her, as she has taken a liking to milk's flavor and now takes it all by herself from a cup with a built in straw.

I know that it is tedious and time consuming, but all worth it. I wanted our daughter to like the taste of milk so as she gets older she can drink on her own with a straw cup. I think if I didn't introduce milk (formula or cow) when I did with spoon feeding, she might not acquire a taste for it. And now she loves it.

My advise to you is to try this method as kids grow older they become more independent and will eventually ask for milk in a cup. Happy Milk Mom

4-month-old refuses bottle, resorting to sippy cup

I have been breastfeeding my son since birth and he is 4 months old now. I introduced the bottle to him when he was 4 weeks old and he was drinking one feed a day until he was 8 weeks old and then all of a sudden he refused to take the bottle. I have tried everything and keep offering him an ounce or two everyday hoping that he will take the bottle. I have decided to start him on the sippy cup as I will be going back to work when he turns 6 months old. I bought a sippy cup but realized it has a valve which means he will have to suck from it, which he is not interested in (I figured this would happen). Is 4 months too young to start on the sippy cup without the valve ? What should I do when he starts daycare ? I plan to start him on solids when he is close to 6 months old but even then, milk will be his primary source of nutrition and I am afraid that he will not drink milk from the cup or the bottle when he is in daycare. Has anyone else experienced this problem? Any advice would be welcome. worried mama

The absolute worst thing you'll have to go through is knowing that your baby hasn't eaten all day (and this is very very hard.) The best thing to know is something an advice nurse told me: most babies will absolutely take the bottle when they are hungry enough, even though some people tell you they won't. In our case this was true. During the day, she did not eat, and i nursed her every hour until bedtime and through the night. She coped by sleeping more during the day and crying, of course. Finally, thankfully she is taking it.

If you can afford it, hire someone you trust to do this for you all week/weekend. The greatest advice nurse told me that the babies will not take a bottle from their breastfeeding mother. After all, why would they when you've got what they want.

visit www,kellymom.com for great info and support.

Good luck, I really feel your pain. But I just know that your baby can and will do it! ssc

Also, I've seen many posts on BPN about kids not taking a bottle/sippy at daycare. A lot of folks wrote saying it's ok if they go 7 - 8 hrs at daycare w/ out drinking much, but that they'll make up for it at home. anon

She started daycare when she was 6 months old as well. A couple weeks before daycare, we started solids. I gave her a sippy cup w/o a valve but she didn't know what to do w/ it. I first had to teach her to drink my milk from a small open top cup (small diameter shot glass to be exact). I then moved to the sippy cup w/o a valve. She is using the sippy cup top for the Avent bottles. Some of the other sippy cups were too hard to use w/o a valve. They had internal drains on the lids that did not allow for all the milk to come out of the cup. Some cups had views that were obstructed and I could not see whether milk was pouring out from the spout. I found the Avent bottles w/ sippy cup spout to be the best. The daycare is now feeding her milk w/ the Avent bottle/sippy lid. It takes a while and it can be very messy, but it works. At daycare, she eats solids 2 to 3 times a day and has 3 'bottles' of milk.

On the positive side, your baby won't be lying down sucking milk from a bottle, which prevents ear infections, and you won't need to wean him from a bottle. Right now my daughter is learning to hold an open cup with handles and can almost drink from the cup! Good Luck! pamela

-spoon feed breastmilk or formula that has been slightly thickened with rice cereal -offer sips of breastmilk or forumula thru a regular cup

-tried at straw (at my pediatrician's recommendation) -give baby applesauce, pears and carrots, especially for their watery, non constipating quality -introduced whole fat yogart (okay'd by my pediatrician) just to get more milk products and calories in him.

-offered watered down juice via the bottle, which the little stinker will drink a little of and keeps him hydrated

this all takes a lot of effort on the part of his caregive (his dad) but it seems to keep him properly hydrated and content. when i get home from work, i basically nurse him twice an hour until he goes to bed and i breastfeed him more frequently at night. we were having a constipation issue, but that has resolved since he started taking 2-3 ounces of juice and water while i'm away along with pureed prunes. we continue to offer the bottle and sippycup, but so far he hasn't taken from them. i think its a good idea to start the table foods for your baby sooner than later so that he/she will have a good repetoire going by time you go back to work. remember in the begining you should only offer one new food every 5 to 7 days.

also, don't give up on the bottle and sippycup, cause you never know what your baby will give in to when your not around. i would also recommend pumping in the evenings before you return to work so that when you do start working your body will be ready to meet the baby's feeding demands in the evenings after work. good luck. i can't say it isn't a little stressful, but it's do-able. mommy of babe who loves the breast

She takes it just fine and prefers that. The way I look at it now is that at least I wont have to wean her from a bottle later on. Check to see if the day cares would do that...I dont know why they wouldnt becuase its just like bottle feeding. Good Luck... mina

Struggling to get 4-month-old to take bottle

I am really struggling trying to get my 4 month old boy to take a bottle. I introduced the bottle when he was 2 months (one a day), but have continued to breastfeed. I have tried everthing...different nipples, different times of the day, someone else giving him the bottle, etc... and it is not getting any easier. It takes an hour to give him 3 oz and then he is hungry again 1/2 hour later. He just lolls the nipple in his mouth and can't quite seem to suck. I really want to continue breastfeeding for at least another 6 months, but also want him to drink from a bottle. I would love to hear any suggestions or if anyone has had a similar struggle and what you did about it. Lisa

Breastfed 4-month-old refusing formula

I have a 4 month old son, who has been breastfeed exclusively. I will be starting work in 3 weeks so i want to introduce formula. I have tried several times but he is rejecting it. His father has also tried feeding him formula in a bottle but without any sucess. Since i am starting work soon, I am really concerned. Pumping is not an option for me as it is too painful(even with an electric pump).

When i start work I want to nurse him once in the morning and then in then evening and nights. However I want to feed him formula while I am away during the day. Does anyone know if this can work (both breastfeed and formula feedings)? Also does anyone have tips on how I can make him take the formula? Please help...

Chances are, your baby will come to accept the bottle eventually, but even if he doesn't, he'll likely be fine. I know a few moms whose babies have ''reverse cycled'' -- sleeping a lot and taking the bare minimum from a bottle during the workday, and nursing a lot in the evening and through the night. If you can cope with that, it's fine for your baby.

The bad news Your baby is probably rejecting both the taste of the formula (smart boy!) and the bottle itself. There are lots of tricks that you can try to help with bottle refusal, but everyone I know who's dealt with this was using pumped breastmilk, not formula, so I've no idea whether they'll work for you. Anyway, the main one is to vary the temperature of the milk (formula); try everything from a bit warmer than body temp to straight out of the fridge. Also, try varying how the person feeding the bottle holds the baby -- some prefer a greater distinction from nursing position, while others reject the bottle unless everything else is as close as possible to nursing. Oh, and DON'T try to give bottles yourself (except possibly as a last resort.) You want him to learn that Mommy=nursing and Everyone Else=bottles; otherwise, nipple confusion, bottle preference, nursing strikes and premature weaning are more likely.

Also You said you can't pump because it's painful, and I wonder whether you've tried some different types of pump? Or hand expression? Have you tried it since you got over the newborn-period sore and/or cracked nipples (assuming you have)? (A decent pump should not be painful. If you've been using a Gerber, First Years or Evenflo, throw it in the trash and buy a real pump.) I had HUGE psychological issues with using an electric pump and, throughout my pregnancy, insisted that I Would Not Pump. Well, to make a long story short, some of the initial problems we had breastfeeding put an end to that, and I learned that I could indeed cope with using the Avent Isis manual pump, and got good enough results to use it at work every day for seven months.

But if you choose not to (and it's hard to blame you -- pumping *is* a royal pain), then don't worry. Your baby won't starve himself. You'll work it out. I wish you the best. Holly

A couple of suggestions

1) maybe try a different kind of formula. We used enfamil lactose free and found that was easier on his tummy. maybe he just doesn't like the taste of the particular one you are using.

2) We did it by having my husband try to feed him the bottle at the same time each day (for us it was the early morning feeding so I could sleep in). If the baby didn't cry but didn't take the bottle, he'd just wait a few minutes and try again. The first couple of times it didn't work, but after few tries of being introduced to the same thing at the same time, our son came to expect it and finally took the bottle. It became a bonding experience between him and his father. Maybe this would work with a caregiver as well. Gradually my son came to be able to take formula from his caregiver, my husband, and even me! I continued to both breastfeed and supplement with formula untill I weened him at 11 months.

Hope this helps, and good luck!
been there

Only you know if this choice if it is the right one for you and your baby. Good luck!

happy supplementer

6-week-old won't take a bottle

We are trying to start our 6 week old, breasfeeding baby on the bottle as I will be going back to work soon. Have tried numerous different nipples with no luck. Have tried the Avent, Gerber and Nuk. any suggestions or ideas? Thanks! Rikki

Breastfed 6-week-old suddenly refuses bottle

My daughter is 6 weeks old, and was taking a bottle on a daily basis without a problem. Suddenly, she's decided not to take it. She starts to latch onto it, sometime drinking a little, and then starts fussing and crying. We've been unsuccessful in our attempts to try it at different times of day, with different people, the bait and switch, etc. I'm wondering if anyone has any successful experience to share. Should I give it a break for a while? Should we keep trying daily? Should we be persistent, and let her cry through it? I'm becoming very concerned that this will be a big problem when I have to go back to work in four weeks. Thanks for any help! Laura laura

We tried to understand WHY and WHY NOW. A dozen theories, but we could never really figure out what it was. That my partner had tried the bottle at night once so that I get some more sleep? that the milk had been too cold once? or not fresh enough? or the baby feeling she was to be forced to stay with relatives who were visiting? the wrong bottle nipples? Etc.

A few times we were lucky with fingerfeeding (very slow, but could delay a nursing) and spoonfeeding. But not really, she started to resist that as well.

We didn't want to let her cry, but actually ended up doing exactly what you do not want to do if you believe in conditioning ''good habits'' in babies We kept trying a couple of times, listened to her protest for a while, and then we gave in. We let her breaking our will, not the other way round. Our daughter was a very easy and happy newborn (and still is now, at age 11 months). The only one really important thing to her was nursing. We felt that it would be unfair of us to be so insisting about the bottle. This precious baby has only this one desire, we really should let her have it is what we felt. And if we communicated to her that she is allowed to have her own will, that's good. (Every child will figure that out eventually.)

We felt relieved after we made the decision to stop trying the bottle. It had added an enourmous amount of stress to our lives.

Someone recommended not to try anymore for 3 weeks. Then we would have a differnt baby. I didn't really believe it. We didn't try anymore for 5 weeks.

Your going back to work must be a very scary thought for you. Maybe you can make a worst case scenario. Taking baby to your work maybe with a babysitter, or babysitter hanging out very close to where you work, cell phones, working from home - to name a few things.

If smokers can leave their workplace every hour for 10 minutes, than nursing mothers can do so for 20 minutes every other hour. Don't feel bad about expecting others to make a few compromises. You are currently following the schedule of a newborn 24 hours a day. Others can also make a few compromises. Another point is that breastfed babies get sick far less often than bottlefed babies, and that is certainly in the interest of an employer. (If a 3 months old has an ear infection the mother is probably going to stay home no matter what.) Look at your work situation closely. Things often can be stretched here and there. It's probably only going to be a problem for a very short time after all.

My work situation was very flexible, and I am grateful for that. But I also had to take my daughter to some meetings and workshops (she stayed with a babysitter close by) where I wouldn't have dreamt to take a baby along before I had a baby myself.

After 5 weeks we tried again and it worked. She didn't really like it, but she took it. My partner gave her the bottle during a walk in the sling. He started giving it to her while she was still half asleep, in the process of waking up and crying for milk. Now she didn't care which nipple. Nuk, Avent - whatever.

Around 6 months she started to really like and explore solids, and it got very easy from there.

We still minimized the number of bottle feedings not to make her upset again. Then it became easier and easier. Especially when she got interested in touching and manipulating objects. The bottle became something like a toy for her. However, she would always prefer the breast, especially when she is tired. Good luck, Julia

When he was around four months old we got advice that we needed to be persistent and try a bottle every single day, to give it at the same time of day (when he was a little hungry but not to wait until he was starving nor wait until he was really tired), and to not get sidetracked trying every type of bottle and nipple under the sun (we stuck with the Nuk orthodontic silicone model). We also were to try feeding him the bottle in different ways and places in the lap, in the bouncy chair, while walking him in a bjorn, etc. Also I'm sure you've heard that it might be easier for the non-lactating parent to be the bottle giver as baby knows Mommy has the good stuff on her.

My son refused the bottle every day for 4 weeks, then would randomly take a little milk one out of 5 times, and now finally is taking the bottle again, about 8 weeks from when we started getting serious about reintroducing it. For some reason giving him the bottle outside in the park worked for him. Go figure.

He is now seven and 1/2 months old. I had originally planned to return to work for two full and one half day a week, but with his bottle refusal I changed my schedule to five days a week, mornings only. My situation was easier because by the time I returned to work he was six months old and taking solid food, so he would take expressed milk mixed with rice cereal on a spoon. Even though he finally started taking the bottle this week, I plan to keep the four hour shifts as I think it will be easier for him to have me consistently gone a short time every day instead of either home all day or gone all day.

My advice is be persistent in trying every day, be consistent about the time of day you try, don't force it when the baby gets upset, see if you can get your baby to take a binkie ( to keep baby used to sucking on rubber nipples)and with an older baby to let the baby play with their bottle like a toy. Chances are she'll eventually get back on track if she's only been refusing a short time. But there are some very stubborn babies who will not return to the bottle and if your child ends up being one of then I would explore working only half days out of the house until Baby is able to eat from a spoon if this at all an option.

Good luck getting Baby back on the bottle; I know how stressful it is returning to work, and how the stress is compounded when you are worried your baby isn't eating. Susanna

So, I don't know what to tell you about whether or not to keep trying. Before you go back to work, you might want to leave him alone with grandparents or dad and a bottle and see what he does when you are out of the house. Also, we always fed my son pumped breast milk; formula tastes different, so you might try breast milk first, then mix formula and breast milk and then transition to formula (if that's what you're planning on feeding your baby). Plus, once he starts solids (usually between 4-6 months) he may eat solids and not as much milk when you're away. Good luck! Laura

7-week-old won't take a bottle

I've been trying to get my 7-week-old son to start taking a bottle. He has been breast fed exclusively since birth. I will be returning to work at the end of August and I want him to be comfortable with it by then. Also, it would be nice to be able to leave him for a little bit without worrying that he'll be hungry.

He takes a pacifier (Nuk) and we bought the same kind of nipple for the bottle. But when my husband tries to give him the bottle, my son just ends up crying. He does get a few drops of milk but does not seem motivated to start sucking to get more.

Any suggestions? Some people have said ''He'll take it if he's hungry enough.'' But that seems so traumatic to me. I'm hoping there's a better way.

Thanks. rcl

2-month-old now refuses the bottle

Does anyone have any advice on how to convince a breastfed baby to accept bottles? We are at our whits end. Our normally happy and easy-going 2 month old baby has recently started to completely refuse the bottle (she accepted bottles easily her first month). She is breastfed, but I'd like her to take a bottle during the 4-5 hours that I need to be away at work.

She started refusing bottles when we went on vacation and didn't keep up with the bottles. It's my pumped breastmilk, so it's not a formula problem. I'm afraid we probably made the situation worse by trying to continue giving her the bottle when she was crying. Now she starts crying at the sight of the bottle approaching. Different people have tried (even grandma), we've tried different nipples (gerber's, avent, playtex, rubber, silicone, fast flow, slow flow, preemie). We've tried a medicine dropper and even Medela's Hazelbaker FingerFeeder (a supplementer that allows you to feed baby from your finger). In every case, as soon as she figures out that it's not a breast (a second or so), she starts refusing. She won't even suck on a finger as a substitute. We're not forcing her anymore, just offering it to her, but she will cry and cry for 2 hours (that's as long as we've dared to go). I've even tried leaving the house when my husband is trying, but still no dice.

I've been told that some babies just won't take bottles, but she used to before. It just pains me so much to hear her crying and crying when she could just take a bottle. I'm not as freaked out about it as I used to be, since I realize that she won't starve, but eventually she'll need to go to daycare, at least part-time, so I'm really concerned. I'd really appreciate hearing if anyone has had similar experiences. Is it hopeless, or have you had any success? Thanks for your help! Marguerite

It will also get easier in a few months when your baby starts to eat some rice cereal and other starter foods. It certainly doesn't satisfy them in the same way, but at least if you're getting some solids in, you don't feel quite so bad when they bottle strike. Good luck!

(2) Make your bottle routine really different than the breast feeding routine. For our baby, that meant I (mom) couldn't even be in the house. Her daddy found that putting her in the sling and walking around with her worked the best (and it was really different than our nursing routines of rocking in the chair or lying in the bed).

(3) Go to a La Leche League meeting and talk to experienced breastfeeding moms or call a La Leche League leader. They are a great resource. Ilana

The first thing that worked for me is that I declared I wanted to give up trying - accept he would never take a bottle - and a huge weight was lifted. We shifted our energy from trying to change him, to trying to find another alternative that worked. The problem is that all the advice - in books, from friends, family, professionals - convinces you that there must be SOME WAY to make your baby take the bottle, instead of giving you options other than the bottle. We did find a way - quickly - as soon as we put our minds to it. First, I work close to his daycare, so I went there to feed him at lunch for the first few months. I don't know if this is a possibility for you, but if there is any way you can make it work, it is worth the effort. I came to love our mid-day visits, and it helped smooth the transition to daycare. Second, a consultant pointed out to us that he would be on a sippy cup in a few months anyway, and the beauty of a sippy cup is that the milk pours into their mouth - they do not have to actively suck - and they have no choice but to swallow. The product that saved us was Avent's soft rubber sippy-cup-shaped nipple that fits on its regular bottles. In the beginning, we gave him just a few sips, putting it in, pulling it out right away, and then I breastfed him. He was held upright in our lap, or sometimes in the car seat. He had some trouble, but soon got the hang of it. He by no means had it mastered by the time he went to daycare, but our center was very patient and his desire for milk won out. The combination of lunchtime visits and the slow learning curve (never pushing) of the Avent sippy worked for us. At 18 months, he still uses the Avent sippy (we use it for milk only) and can hold it himself and handle the fast flow - so it is like he takes a bottle after all.

I am sure you have heard that some babies do not have milk during the day and make up for it at night by breastfeeding more. While not ideal, I think it is preferable to shrug your shoulders and say, "we'll make it work," rather than beating yourself up over the bottle thing.

In restrospect (and this is too late for either of us, but I do tell my pregnant friends this, and I know it is controversial), I would have allowed a bottle to be introduced in the hospital, and I would have given him a bottle more often than once a week. But in the end, like all things baby, they find their own way and, together, you make it work. Good luck. Jennifer

- change of location -- our baby did a lot better with the bottle when he was in an unfamiliar environment. We tried feeding him outdoors, at friends' homes, and in rooms where he wasn't breastfed.

- don't let it escalate -- this was advice we got from our ped's office and it helped us. Once he started crying a lot, we just stopped, because we didn't want it to become a war of wills and have him associate the bottle with being really upset.

- change of position -- one position that worked well for us was NOT holding him, just putting him on the floor and letting him suck the bottle.

- take a break -- I think we just gave up for about a week or so, then reintroduced the bottle. He actually kind of forgot how much he hated it.

- time of day -- we discovered that the one time he would take a bottle, almost consistently without protest, was at bedtime, right before going to sleep (he would tank up to get ready for bed, so he was always hungrier). So we started adding a bottle at bedtime, and this seems to have made giving bottles during the day easier.

Good luck! Teresa and Sam

8-week-old will not take the bottle - been trying since week 4

Our eight week old baby will not take the bottle. We've been trying since week four with no luck. We probably did not try consistently enough and I was not always out of the house as recommended but any ideas for success at this time? Robin

1. Have someone besides mom give the bottle, and have mom out of sight.

2. Try heating milk on the warmer side--some babies like this. Also, try freshly pumped breastmilk (are you offering frozen? it might taste different).

3. Try giving the bottle while bouncing on one of those exercise balls, this seems to distract them and they start sucking automatically.

4. Bait and switch--- have mom breastfeed, then when baby is in a rhythm slip nipple out and bottle in, chances are baby will just keep sucking.

5. Try holding baby facing away from you and bouncing him up and down, with bottle in mouth. This again sometimes distracts them enough to start sucking.

6. Try various nipples-- they come in different sizes/shapes (silicone has less of a taste and our baby prefers it to latex)

I went back to work part-time at 10 wks and my husband had to ''bottle-train'' baby the hard way while I was gone -- even though we had given our baby a bottle a day since week three, he always preferred the breast (and still does now at 4 months). My husbands approach: he would try for ten minutes (crying), take a ten minute break, try again for ten minutes(crying), and so on. Eventually some milk would get in the baby.... Also, once you make progress, stick with it. Make sure baby takes at least a bottle (or two is even better) a day even on the days mom is home, so he/she doesn't forget.

Good luck. anon

One important thing is to be patient. I found that it was worse for my son if I forced him to take the bottle, or if I kept trying to give it to him when he obviously didn't want it. I tried once to withhold a feeding, thinking that if he got really hungry, he'd take the bottle. This approach, however, did not work, as all it got me was a lot of stress and crying from him. In my opinion, what worked was offering hiim the bottle everyday at the same time when he was hungry, but not starving, and if he fussed or was clearly not interested, I'd put the bottle away, breast feed, and try it again the next day. I believe that babies sense your mood, so if you act like it's no big deal, it won't be a big deal to them, either. Good luck, and remember, it may take some time for your baby to take a bottle, but it can be done. new mom

I just went back to work part time two weeks ago. Our baby, Lily, will be five months on Feb. 20. She is breast fed and we tried to offer the bottle to her starting at about six weeks but she never really took to it. Now she becomes very upset when our babysitter gives it to her. (I am pumping). She cries really hard and only drinks an ounce at most. This weekend my husband tried the botttle (I left) and altho she didn't cry she only drank about an ounce again. I have only been working mornings, so leave her 5 1/2 hours at the most, so she nurses like crazy after I pick her up. Aside from the feeding problem she seems happy and stimulated with our babysitter. We've tried gerber and avent nipples. She seems to prefer the brown gerber one. A possible solution is for me to just work four half days until she takes to the sippy cup which I tried today and she didn't swallow any milk but it's easier for me to work two and a half days since it's a 30 minute drive. any ideas? Thanks! Andrea

You can also try a few other things, many of which I and the mothers in my new moms group tried: distract the baby -- ma bottle feeding "no big deal" by walking around the house as you do it, talking about other things, etc.; only feed a few ounces at a time instead of giving a whole feeding at once -- if the baby wants more, give another small amount (this has the added advantage of not wasting precious pumped milk -- if s/he doesn't take it, you only throw out a little bit); have someone other than mom give the bottle; try bottle feeding only when the baby is really hungry (note: this technique backfired on me, since it only made my baby angrier -- I had to do the opposite and try when she was *not* very hungry, sometimes after nursing a little first); bottle feed at the same time every day so your baby will come to expect it, then gradually increase the number of bottles to what you'll need when you have child care.

Finally, rest assured that your baby *will* get over this -- mine did, and so did everyone else I've heard about.

For the first two months after I returned to work, I took our caregiver to work with me. She took the baby and walked around campus and hung out in the engineering lounge during the day and brought the baby to me every two hours to feed. I also negotiated a special parking pass just for those two months as I fed the baby in the car--- there was no private, comfortable place to sit down. This worked until I decided it was too cold and rainy out. Then I negotiated at work to take 2 one hour breaks during each day and drove home then (15 minutes drive each way) to feed the baby so she was breastfed every 3 hours. Did that for a while -- sometimes required that I come in on the weekend to make up a few hours. Then I switched to half time work and negotiate to work at home where I had childcare. Which is just to say that, if your baby is as stubborn as mine, there may be a variety of possibilities for dealing with this problem. Good luck.

One consequence; my son still seems to save up his thurst for 6pm when he sees me. He always nurses then, and I am very full, so I think he gets a lot of milk then. He also still nurses twice a night, despite our attempts to limit this. I think he drinks at night and not in the day. I'm not worried at this point- I am sure he will be fine by the time he is 20. Good luck!

When I returned to work, our daughter was 4 months old, and had only taken one or two bottles before (I, too, introduced it WAY too late). We tried many bottle/nipple variations -- none seemed to work. Then, at a friends suggestion, we put the handles on the Avent bottle, and VOILA! She took it like she'd been doing it all her life!

I had a similar situation when my baby started daycare at 7 months and refused to take bottle and baby food from the daycare provider on her first day. I immediately gave her the bottle when I went to pick her up after 4 hours, but then switched hands with the daycare provider holding the bottle half way through the feeding. I stepped behind the provider's back (out of my baby's sight) and kept talking to my baby throughout the remainder of the feeding. My baby must have had the impression that the provider had my voice. For some reason that was the turning point, and she willingly accepted bottle and food from the daycare provider from that moment on. Hope it works for you too. I don't know, I spontaneously came up with that idea back then - it's nothing I read anywhere - maybe I was just plain lucky.

We had this exact issue when I went back to work at 3 months. My daughter had never had a bottle of anything or a pacifier (we had tried, she just wouldn't use it), just breast milk. After several unsuccessful attempts we did 2 things that eventually worked. 1) I left the house completely, not just the room and 2) NUK nipples for the bottle (I found mine at Rockridge Kids, they did not carry the right kind at Lucky's or Payless). I was skeptical of this advice initially but the type of nipple really does make a difference. A friend of mine actually had to go to a silicon vs. a rubber nipple to finally have success. There are probably a good 5 or 6 different kinds of nipples and babies may react different to each. We had unsuccessfully tried Platex, Advent and another angled kind of nipple (I can't remember the brand name) before having success with the NUK.

Have you tried switching nipples? My baby is now one year old and was on breast only for the first 3-3 1/2 month. I started to switch him to bottled breast milk (just like you) around 3 1/2 month because I was going back to work too at 4 months. I tried switching various nipples made by different companies, different textures, and different shapes. Most nipples are interchangable with the normal bottle except for the ones where you use a disposable liner inside the bottle. So I bought one or two of each nipple (and 2 of those wider bottles).

Also, I alternated between breast and bottle feeding. So if his first feeding of the day was breast, then the next one was going to be bottle. If he didn't eat much of it, I wouldn't give him the breast until it was time for the 3rd feeding. So, he may go through 6 hours without much food. But during this period, I would keep offering him the bottle. He ended up taking an ounce or two around half way to the third feeding. This way, I knew that even if he didn't eat enough of the bottle milk, he would still get enough nutrient from the next feeding. I must warn you, that last 3 hours where they're crying and fussing is difficult because it's so easy for us to just give in.

Have you tried using different kinds of nipples on the bottle? My son was/is VERY picky about the nipple on his bottle. He has always only wanted a certain brand of nipple and they have to be colored (he especially likes the red ones). I had to experiment with a lot of different brands, shapes and sizes to find the right one for him. Keep trying and I'm sure you'll find something that he'll like.

My son had a hard time accepting a bottle when I had to go back to work, although he was a little younger, 12 wks. It took two weeks for him to finally get used to drinking from the bottle (he would only take about 1 oz/day while I was away and he would cry almost the entire time). It was tough, but after those two weeks he must have realized what was happening and just started accepting the bottle. Things that may have helped was to hold him upright and facing forward while giving him a bottle, and to walk around while doing so (my husband had the best luck when the baby was in the front pack). Also he liked his bottles very warm.

The two weeks when he wasn't taking a bottle were hell, and I even asked the pediatrician about it. He said that some babies just don't want a bottle. He told me about another Dr. in the practice that had had a baby that refused a bottle entirely while her mother was at work, and made up for the lost milk when Mom was at home. That baby is now a perfectly healthy 10 month old.

Other friends have told that it takes one or two weeks for the baby to get used to it, and it is just one of those awful times that you have to get through. Hope this helps, and good luck!

bottle tip- did anyone mention trying the Avent bottle? That was the only one my son liked around 4 months, and he took to that right away (after many tries with others). More like Mom, I guess.

We had the same problem. We tried to feed our daughter at 3 months with a bottle. Nothing worked. We tried all the nipples - still nothing worked, so we gave up after one month. I belong to another group - it's an Australian mother group and got a tip from one of the Aussie mothers - she had her baby go straight to a sippy cup. My La Leche Group in New Jersey also suggested this. My daughter learned to use the sippy cup just after a few tries. Maybe this will work for your 4 month old.

I need advice about introducing the bottle so my baby can drink breastmilk once I go back to work. I read the advice above but it hasn't been too helpful so far.

I have got 10 different kinds of nipples by now, Avent and Nuk and straight ones, in various sized and flow-rates, silicon and rubber, and absolute nothing works. My daughter hasn't even taken one sip from any of them. It doesn't matter if she's hungry or not quite yet. I've just had her go without food for 7 hours today, which means not only her screaming with hunger, but also me pumping milk constantly, because you can't keep milk for too long once the baby has had the nipple in her mouth contaminating it with the bacteria from her mouth (at least that's what they taught me in the hospital - is this true?).

My husband has tried unsuccessfully, too, with various kinds of nipples, and I can't expect him to fight this struggle for weeks to come while he is working full-time, so how can I possibly leave the house for the hours that we try bottle-feeding?

We even got one of these soft spouts for training cups, but any milk that goes into my daughter's mouth from this or any bottle she pushes out wuth her tongue, so it all ends up on her clothes, while she keeps screaming.

I'm just at the end of my energy, we're not making any progress, and I find myself in tears every day. Are there any child care givers out there whom you can hire for a short time just to get this problem sorted out. Maybe someone can recommend an experienced person. Or are there any magic tricks that I don't know about?

You are not alone. I too welcome any suggestions on feeding my 4.5 month old daughter who so far has completely refused all bottles, pacifiers, etc. and I am scheduled to go back to work in early September.

This is regarding your problem trying to get your baby to drink from a bottle. My husband got our baby to drink from a bottle after a few failures and much distress on my part. Here are some tips. I'm sure you have heard of many of them, but I hope one of them is new and will help:

1- You should be completely out of the building when Daddy is trying to get the baby to take the bottle. Baby can smell Mommy a mile away, and sense Mommy waiting and worrying in the other room, when a bottle is pushed into their face. I lurked around the corner and worried and worried instead of just leaving while my husband worked with our baby.

2- Get a "Granny-type" or a person who has a lot of experience with babies. Some people who have worked a lot with babies seem to have a special kind of patience and firmness with them and know how to get things done.

3- I know you want the baby to drink breast-milk, not formula, and it is great that you can pump. But in order to get the baby to drink from the bottle, have you considered getting a small can of soy formula? The smell of the breast-milk in the bottle might be just reminding your baby that you aren't there. "Where's Mommy? What's this rubber thing in my mouth?" She might be willing to take formula instead. Then you could mix in breast-milk in higher and higher concentrations until baby is getting only breast-milk. I reiterate, breast is best, but it may be worth a try.

Regarding getting breast-fed babies to take a bottle: this advice is too late for the person writing, but it should be repeated for the benefit of others to come as this isn't the first time it's come up in this group: Our pediatrician said that a baby should be given a bottle by the age of 6 weeks or he/she may never take one. I've seen his observation to be true with the babies of friends.

Hi, This is a response to Angela, who is having a problem introducing a bottle to her baby.

Angela, I had a similar problem with my now 16-month-old daughter. We waited until she was 11 weeks old, which was outside the window recommended by the baby books we had. She took the bottle the first time we tried, but would have nothing to do with it after that. I tried various nipples/bottle systems and ended up using Avent on the recommendation of a friend (although I think the others would have worked eventually).

What finally worked was this: I would nurse her and she would fall asleep still suckling a little; when she fell off my breast, I would slip the bottle in her mouth. I think this allowed her to get used to the nipple while she was very relaxed. I did this for about a day, every chance I got, and after that she started drinking from the bottle. Also, I think it's VERY important to remain calm and detached (which is not easy with a screaming, hungry baby in your arms) and to have an "I don't care if she drinks this or not" attitude. My husband would get tense and impatient, and she would refuse it, but if I took her and talked to her softly and tried not to attach any importance to the event, she would drink.

One other thing: once she starts drinking from a bottle, give her one maybe once a day for practice. Good luck!

PS: While I was holding my daughter, speaking softly to her, and trying to remain detached, we were standing in front of the refrigerator in our kitchen. This might have helped because (1) I almost never nursed her in the kitchen and (2) the fridge is covered with photos, magnets, and newspaper clippings, giving her something interesting to look at/be distracted by. Hope this helps!

Our daughter also would not take a bottle. We tried all the nipples, etc. The only thing that did work, although it was time-consuming, was to get one of those little syringes with the curved tip, put it on your finger held pad up, and very gently squeeze the syringe as she sucks on your finger. Of course, *I* couldn't do this, because as long as I was in the room she would scream for the breast. But my husband or the babysitter was able to do it.

As for the problem with wasting milk in the bottle, we soon learned that each time we tried a new nipple, we only put about 1 ounce of milk in the bottle, so that when she refused it we didn't lose a whole lot of milk!

If nothing works, and your baby will only take the breast (it's a fairly common problem, apparently!) I also know other mothers who were able to work out flexible schedules with their employers, such as coming home for a long coffee break in the morning and afternoon to nurse, and taking a shorter lunch or staying later in the evening to make up the hours. Another woman I know found a daycare very near her job, and was able to run over during morning and afternoon breaks and at lunch to nurse her baby. After a couple of months, she only needed to stop by at lunchtime. Pretty soon the baby will be eating solids and you can get by with nursing only in the morning, evening, and at night. It happens sooner than you expect! Best of luck!

What a horrible experience for you to go through! It's hard enough leaving your child without having to endure all this screaming, too. Have you tried using a syringe? My doctor gave me one that is quite large, and has a blunt end. You can then stick it in the baby's mouth and squirt the milk into the throat actively. I didn't see this listed as something you'd already tried. Good luck!

For practical help on how to transition a fussy baby from breast to bottle, try seeking the help of a lactation consultant. There is a wonderful one here in El Cerrito named Janaki Costello. She is an "International Board Certified Lactation Consultant" and has lots of experience and very reasonnable consultation fees. She can be reached at 510-525-1155.

When my first son had some similar difficulty it seemed to me that he was frustrated with the bottle because he wasn't getting as much milk as fast as he was used to getting it from my breast. We also tried a bunch of different nipples and ended up adding a few small holes to the nipples he seemed least upset with, to make them more breast-like, and this solved his problem.

I can sympathize with your issue regarding trying to give your breast fed baby a bottle. My daughter (who is now 9 months) also refused the bottle. We had a little success with the NUK nipple but she put up a huge fuss anyway. I had to return to work when she was six months. What ended up working for us is that by then she was eating cereal. My childcare provider would feed her cereal mixed with breast milk throughout the day. So, basically she was being spoonfed the breast milk. The cup was a little too much for her. When I picked her up after eight hours she would nurse happily. At seven (!) months she finally realized a bottle was okay and now drinks one a day (and it doesn't matter at all what nipple we use). Hang in there!

I agree with your pediatrician that if you keep trying, things will probably settle themselves. But you might think about being creative in what you try. Keep in mind, too, that while seven working days may feel like an eternity, it's really not a very long time to get used to a new routine. Just because your child hasn't adjusted yet doesn't mean that she won't. And until she does, best of luck getting through a very stressful time.

She never took a bottle until she was like 14 months old, although I wish she would have earlier. At first it was really tough on the care givers: she would be thirsty and cry and they didn't have what she wanted. The advice I got was to try different nipples, also different liquids, like breastmilk, and different kinds of formulas, and try to find a combination which is acceptable. Some kids think breastmilk in a bottle is a poor substitute for the breast and would rather drink something else (although we still have to pump or have huge sore breasts). I thought it was pretty unnatural for the baby to go all day without drinking, my lactation nurse assured me it would be okay (some babies of this age can sleep through the night without drinking anything) but you are trading one for the other. If you are continuing the nurse the baby full time except during the day, you'll have many night feedings. The upside is you'll probably be tired enough of meeting the demands of at least three people (your child, partner, and boss not to mention yourself) that you'll sleep through them.

I think really the course of action depends on your priority of continuing to nurse the baby. If you are planning on weaning soon anyway, I would be pushing the bottle good and hard. If you really want to nurse for a year or at least quite a few months more, I would persist with what you are doing. It seems inconceivable that your baby really won't drink every day, 5(?) days a week, but don't underestimate the stubborness of a 12 lb. little bundle. But if the child has capitulated this much, he or she will probably drink a regular bottle eventually. If (s)he doesn't, I would try to nurse during the day. My supervisor was surprisingly empathetic when I explained the situation.

As for what happened to me...My daughter was stubborn and just didn't drink during the day. She also didn't take to eating with any kind of consistency and so basically gained no weight (although she got way taller) in the second 6 months of her life. I started nursing her 2xs a day while I was working. On her first birthday she was in the 5th percentile and borderline anemic. After her first birthday, she started drinking Gerber yogurt drinks in a big way, eventually she would drink straight cows milk, even from a bottle. By 18 months she had caught back up and is now a normal sized brilliant 3 year old. I have no idea of course whether she wasn't gaining weight because she wouldn't drink a bottle, perhaps it was just how she was pre-programmed. It helped to have a doctor who just saw this as the normal variation in rate of weight gain, not to mention a wonderful supportive lactation nurse. My best advice is to consult with one of these people in addition to your doctor and La Leche League. I was a Kaiser Hayward patient and talked endlessly with Lori, one of the nurses there. Good luck, and I hope you continue to nurse. The nursing relationship can easily outlast all the problems of the early months and become a wonderful and smooth and easy.

I think there were a lot of things contributing to our daughter's refusal to take a bottle--her strong will, the first daycare's inexperience and anxiety about her not eating, our inexperience and anxiety about her not eating, difficulty adjusting to a radical change in her daily environment and routine, not enough bottle feeding in the first few months, nipples that were too difficult to suck.

When I was able to feed her midday, it took a lot of pressure off both of us. We were also lucky enough to find a babysitter who wasn't worried about her not eating and had enough experience to try different things until something worked. The two positions that worked best are having the baby sit in your lap, facing out, which gives her more control of the bottle, or sitting in the swing, with the bottle propped up in front of her. The nipple she liked best was the low flow silicon Nuk. Since all babies are different, I don't know if these specific ideas will work for you, but I hope it helps to know you're not the only one who's had this problem. Good luck!

5.5 mo. baby who refuses bottle, cereal, and naps!

HELP! I have been struggling to get my baby girl to take a bottle of pumped milk or formula. She shrieks when the bottle is near and we've tried all the suggestions and even let her go up to 7 hours of refusing it before I gave in and gave her the breast. I have to go back to work and have tried everything, even a medicine dropper! I posted once on this board a few months ago and tried all the suggestions but parents kindly emailed but nothing. How long will she go on like this? And, what if I want to wean? Please offer any advice. I am only going to work a few hours a day since she starves and cries all day while I'm gone. Another issue is that she won't fall asleep on her own but that is secondary to the milk issue. What happens at 6 months? She takes a few spoons of cereal but then cries for us to stop. I am so torn and feel so guilty when I leave and I know my baby is not eating. Please offer any advice! steph

6-month-old's bottle strike!

My 6 month old son has been on a bottle strike for about 6 weeks now. We are going nuts. I have a fairly flexible work at home schedule (luckily!), but I am soon going to be very busy and every day is a battle with this little guy. We feel as if we have tried everything: our nanny works with him every day that she is here (3 days) on the other days both my husband and I have tried. What we all essentially get is 1-2 hours of screaming and protesting. We have tried every nipple we can find (we are sticking with Avent for now). We have tried numerous holes.( WE are up to three holes right now.) We have tried warming it and not warming it. We have tried various different times of day... We have tried when he is starving and when he isn't hungry.

We obviously don't want to torture him, in fact we have been advised to used the bottle as a toy and give him a little sugar water to desensitize him. Tried it. He's wise to the game. Bottom line is this kid wants to breast feed. We are able to get 2 oz. at best into him but, again, it is a big struggle. Lots of tears and screaming (and yes, I can't bear it). It is so frustrating to see all of this expressed breast milk go down the drain. And a two hour battle can wreck our day, even if we are only trying to actively feed him for 10 collective minutes and the rest of the time is spent trying to calm him or ourselves down.

What can we do? I must be able to leave him alone with our nanny while I work with a client. I also really want my husband to have the experience of feeding him a bottle the way he used to when our baby took it just fine (which he did since he was 3 weeks of age). Any words of wisdom would be so appreciated!! Molly

I don't have a great solution to report...after three weeks of this my nanny quit, I decided to quit my job rather than have my baby go hungry, and we went several weeks without a bottle at all just to ease the tension. After that time, I was able to get my baby to take the bottle and our part-time babysitter was also successful. Eventually, my husband was able to give the baby a bottle again too. I am not sure what made the difference - at the time it really seemed like a personality conflict between the baby and our nanny, but since she stopped taking a bottle from anyone, I am just not sure.

I wish you lots of luck. I know how frustrating and difficult this situation is. One thing that people suggested to me was to try using a sippy cup rather than a bottle, but my baby was only 4 months old and was not very good with a cup at the time - maybe it is worth a try for you. Caroline

With our daughter (our first) we tried every bottle/nipple combination known to man to no avail. Maybe at six months it's just too late to go to a bottle if you haven't been using it all along. They know a good thing when they see it! Good luck, Julie

At nine months now, he will guzzle water from a bottle, but still not milk. But he is eating solid foods now, and that makes the difference. I can have other people care for him and not worry that he will go hungry because his appitite for solid food is so strong.

Since your baby is six months old, it might be time to start him on solids. Check with your pediatrician for advice on how to start. Most will recommend cereal, rice or oats, mixed with milk for baby's first solids. Use your pumped milk there. Then gradually add in other solid foods following your doctors instructions. I often mixed breast milk in with new foods to ease the transition. Now my baby mostly wants table food, ground up fine, and I no longer mix things with milk.

The main thrick with this transition is making sure the baby gets enough nutition from the variety of solid foods. Again, ask your pediatrician, plus there are some good books on infant nutrition. Since I don't work full time, I still nurse my baby enough to give him all the protien he needs. But it's a great relief to have others be able to feed him too. In fact, it makes those times we still nurse much more pleasureable for us both. Good luck, Carolyn

6 months old won't take bottle

I am planning on weaning my 6 months old from breastfeeding but he won't take the bottle. I tried not breastfeeding him for 17 hours and only gave him both breast milk and formula from the bottle but he refuses to take it! He would take the milk if we spoon feed him and he likes to eat rice cereal. If anyone has any advice or tips on how to make babies take the bottle please help! Thanks First time mom

Often babies who are nursed exclusively won't take a bottle from the person with the boobs.

Start gradually with one feeding a day from the bottle and slowly increase as the bottle is accepted.

Don't forget to pump while away from the baby for more than an hour or two or you could wind up engorged - stepping down nursing should always be a gradual process. (http://workandpump.com has some great tips for going back to work and pumping)

If he really won't take the bottle, try some other options. A sippy cup, a straw-sippy etc. There's also breast-shaped bottles that may help to ease the transition, you can get these online from One Step Ahead and some of the baby stores in Rockridge may carry them.

How established is your son with cereal? If he's in the middle of transitioning to solids and also transitioning to the bottle at the same time, it might be too many changes at once. If you focus on one first and get him comfortable with it, he may be more amenable to the other.

If he likes food and is eager to try solids, you might want to establish him on solids first. With a baby who likes food it doesn't take that long to get them transitioned over to more meals of solid foods and they need less milk as a result so that you might even be able to get away with feeding solids during the day and nursing when you're home, though generally speaking 6 month old babies still need a bottle or a nursing before or after a meal of solids. Beth

6.5-mo-old refuses the bottle

Hi folks, I need your help!!! I am still breast-feeding my 6.5 month old son. We started solid foods, but it is not at a level to replace a meal yet. We have been bottle-feeding him once a week (more or less) with my milk, since he was 2-3 weeks old, and we did not experience any nipple confusion. We even tried formula several times, he accepted easily.

Now things changed all of a sudden. We haven't bottlefeed him for a month or so and now he refuses the bottle all together. We tried formula and my milk, day and night, when he is hungry and full, from my husband and me. We also tried a sippy cup (non-spill-proof) from which he currently drinks his water. He drank some but only a little ( 2oz).

We need to solve this problem soon, since I will start taking evening classes and I won't be at home for his before sleep feeding. Have you experienced similar problems? Do you have any advice and/or suggestions?

Cheers, Nes

Breastfed 7-month-old won't accept bottle at night from dad

How can i get my 7 month old to accept bottles from papa at night? We've had NO LUCK convincing her I'm still alive and love her even if it's not me going into her in the middle of the night with boob in hand. We've tried offering her my pumped milk, rice milk, and formula. No go. We want to experiment with a bottle of formula to see if she can handle it and sleep better. any tips? tired

7.5-month-old won't take a bottle of breastmilt or formula

My 7.5 month old daughter won't take a bottle of breastmilk or formula. I'm going back to work and don't know what to do. I've tried every nipple: Playtex, Avante, Medella, Gerber... no luck. I've pumped and immediately tried to feed her the warm milk, I've tried having my husband give the bottle, her babysitter to give the bottle... no luck. I have given her a bottle of water + apple juice just to see if she'd drink it and she thinks the bottle is just something to play with. She would rather go thirsty then drink from bottle.. oh dear, I'm worried. Any suggestions? EMM

8-month-old chews bottle rather than sucking on it

I have been gradually cutting down breastfeeding my 8 month old son - he loves his solids and eats a ton while I'm at work during the day. He nurses in the morning and evening and sometimes at night. For months my day care provider and I have been trying to get him onto a bottle or sippy cup, but all he will do is chew on it. He is interested in both bottle and cup, reaches for them, and puts them in his mouth, but then chews! Needless to say, he never gets more than half an ounce out, and most of that goes down his front. I wasn't too worried as I was still nursing, but he has just announced a nursing strike, and I am considering taking the opportunity to wean, but am panicked about how I'm going to get enough formula and water into him. Does anyone have any experience with bottle chewers? anon

I'd probably stop offering baby bottles at all, and try various other things -- with water only at first, so that spills won't matter much. Sippy cups with different types of valves and spouts, open cups, sport bottles, straws. Most likely, SOMETHING will work.

If your caregiver really can't get him to drink anything, feed lots of ''wet'' foods like fruit, cereals mixed with water or milk, yogurt. And count diapers to assure yourself that he's not getting dehydrated -- you want to see at least 6 wet ones per day.

Good luck! Holly

Initially, he did have limited success with the kind with no valve that actually releases fluids when the spout is chewed. Most of it ended up on his bib (waterproof is best to start) but he did get the understanding that it was for drinking. Later we taught him to use the Avent magic cup with the soft spout by teaching him first how to make kissy noises, then getting him to imitate us making the noise with the sippy cup in his mouth. At first it surprised him that milk came out and he sputtered, but now he's a pro. Hope this helps. Good luck! mom of twins

Getting 8-month-old onto formula and bottle

I have been exclusively breastfeeding my 8 month old and now want to get her onto both a bottle and formula. She has reluctantly taken a bottle with breast milk and will take a few sips of water from a bottle but has absolutely no interest in formula. In fact, she typically gags when i try to give it to her. We have tried every type of formula available!

So, I had been trying to express milk with a manual pump with extremely meager results. After reading the rave reviews about electric pumps i went and dropped $300 on an electric one. Now, after 4 attempts I have not even managed to get 1 oz. of milk.

I am both frustrated and at a loss as to what the next step should be. While I don't need to transition my child due to returning to work I do need to get her on a bottle for my own well being. I have not had a moment to myself since she's been born because of my exclusive nursing. Any feedback and advice will be greatly appreciated!! anon

Okay, back to the sippy cup, if you haven't tried that, our pediatrician recommended starting w/one that doesn't require them to sip, so one of the free flow cups, you'll obviously have to go slow to begin with. In the end, this is what worked w/my older daugher ~6ish months and it was such a relief, I was in a panic for several months, thinking I would never get a break from the nursing! So I do understand your wanting to introduce an alternate method. Unfortunately, my 4.5 month old is not taking to well to the sippy cup, it's been hit or miss. But I am keeping my fingers crossed.

And another trick is to feed solids and then give the bottle/sippy cup right afterwards.

Don't worry, something will work out, I felt fairly desperate w/my older one, I felt like she would NEVER take anything but my breast... If you want to email me for feedback, we literally tried EVERYTHING with my older one...and did have success eventually. hb

9mo old eating solids, but not taking bottles

Hi I'm still breastfeeding my 9 month old baby (and loving it) but am slightly distressed that she seems to want to consume only solid food now and has little interest in taking a bottle from our nanny. She still nurses with me 3 times a day, but I'm concerned she might not be getting enough liquid/breast milk. Also, seeing as I want to continue breastfeeding I need to pump while I'm at work. Before I decide to start donating my breast milk (which I'm so excited to do!) I want to see if anyone has any thoughts on holding on to it. Do you think she'll ever take bottles of milk again? Thanks for your help! Krista

You can tell they're getting enough if there are plenty of wet and poop diapers and if they're growing/gaining weight. If you kid wants to eat let him! When my son did this I just stopped pumping. Nursing a few times during the day and at night kept my milk up fine and i figured there was no need to be exploding with milk if he's eating more food.

We have to listen to our kids, and lots of the time they're doing what's best for themselves. Good luck, monica

One-year-old refusing bottles, needs extra feedings

My daughter turned one year old recently. She was of normal weight at birth, and had a normal weight gain till six months when I started adding solids and also moved into our own apartment (previously with my parents). She settled well, so there are no anxiety problems - I just mentioned the change for completeness. Her appetite has been pretty poor and its only now that she is taking some food without my pulling my hair out over it. However she has hardly gained any weight in the last six months. The pediatrician says to wait some more time before investigating, as her activity and milestones are normal. My feeling is that if I can get her to drink milk thrice a day, it will help, but I just don't seem to be able to do it. She has a peculiar habit of falling half asleep first - she sucks her thumb while I rock her in my lap - and then latching on to the breast. She has been doing it since about a month of age. Anyway, I tried giving her the bottle before or after the breast but she pushes it out. Also, as the time taken to fall asleep is so variable, I have not been able to maintain the right temperature for milk. Have tried sweetened milk, milk with chocolate flavour Bournvita, cold milk, Lactogen, everything I can think of. She doesn't yet drink from a cup, but I have still tried that. She doesn't like the taste, thats all. She doesn't even take any juice. She used to like yogourt but has stopped for a few months now. Cheese is the only thing she seems to like, and it makes a part of each meal of hers. I just don't know what to do. I have no problems with continuing to breast feed but I don't think it is enough, and she has the feeds down to three or four times a day anyway. I wanted to stop her sucking her thumb too, but that is a secondary issue. Does anyone have any suggestions? At wits' end