Constantly Sick - Did I miss a memo??

Is it me, or are little kids constantly sick? Is anyone else listening to an endless symphony of hacking coughs, irritable whining, and a leitmotif of 'up, mommy, up mommy, UP!!'. I have two kids, 3.5 and 2, and they have been sick as dogs for the last 6 weeks. It kicked-off with an unusual dual snotfest, with mild fever, sore throat and an aversion to speaking to, cuddling with, or being assisted by anyone other than me. Then the older one got a cough that wouldn't go away, along with a compulsion to push her little sister into the dog at every opportunity (not as rare a complication as one might like). Eventually I took her to the doctor. Mild pneumonia. Zithromax. As she got better the shorter one developed an ear infection the doctor described as 'horrible'. Amoxycillin. Then, the taller one developed a fever of 103 and an extreme case of the evil-bitchys, which continues to this day(symptoms include telling everyone except me to 'GO AWAY' and a lot of stomping). Last night the 2 year old started a new cold and has a fever of 102. If you toss in the Berkeley rainy season and the holidays, I doubt I need to go into detail. Let's just say that my expression has become somewhat fixed, and my house looks like a suicide laundry basket walked in and detonated itself. So here are my questions:
1)Is this 'normal'? Are other kids as sick as this?
2)How long does this go on? Do they ever develop an immune system, and please don't say 'when they go to college'.
3)Does anyone have good suggestions on how to cope with protracted periods of crap like this? I've been relying on TV, art projects, and Tylenol, but what should I do with the kids?
4)Am I doing something wrong? Too much dairy? Not enough dairy? Too much wheat? Not enough wheat? More elk antler velvet? Less?
5)How is the lemon law interpreted with regards to toddlers? The older one is past 36 months, so I'm probably out of luck, but can I return the smaller one? If all else fails, does anyone else want to head for the border? I'll drive. Abbi

No, you probably aren't doing anything wrong. (Or did you leave out about sending them to preschool sick, barefoot in the snow, uphill, both ways?) But practically?

You can always work at handwashing. Not that I think it will make much difference. In preschool I assume the kids pass the germs along by osmosis. But it's a good habit for later. Earaches?

Some kids are just more prone to ear infections. Maybe it's anatomy? One of my sisters had a bunch of them. I think she found a lot of comfort in a heating pad or a hot water bottle (wrapped in a layer of towel) used as a pillow. They always say 20 minutes, but I've found it takes longer to do any good.

And lots of teas -- not necessarily caffeinated. Camomile is nice, or mint, just cool it with a little plain water after it brews, to bring to a comfortable, but still warm, temp. But it does get finally get better. About the time you start worrying about curfews, peers, and all that. lw anon

To survive:
- I usually do go to Dr after 5 days of ick/fever just to make sure no ears are involved. - I use meds fairly heavily to keep everyone comfortable (tylenol/advil) including me
-- I feel better if the house isn't a mess so that might mean only take out so I don't have to mess up the kitchen, or 2x a day clean up by the clock, or calling cleaning lady extra time
- Sometimes we just go out even though it seems crazy, just to get out. A walk in the double stroller with everyone bundled up for some fresh air, An errand to Target or Mall (everone stay in stroller) - No place with lots of kids or where they touch stuff but just someplace OUT

- Sometimes I just load everyone in the car, make myself a cup of tea and listen to NPR while we drive around - change of scenery, no HOLDING kids for me etc Hoping Spring brings clear noses!

How to amuse them while ill? Lord, I wish I knew! Nor do I have any great ideas for how to prevent it - everyone seems to have a theory, all of which conflict. But you have my sympathy, if that helps at all. And it DOES get better! My oldest is now 5, in kindergarten and after-school care, and she has not been sick at all so far this year. All those colds and flus gave her one heck of an immune system, I guess, and she is now healthy as can be. So, hang in there, and if you want to make a run for the border, I'll bring the tequila! emma

They are likely getting sickness after sickness because they were/are exposed to a new infection while still recovering (and thus in a weakened state) to the previous one.

The old addage is true: The best defense is a good offense. Plenty of rest, healthy diet, exercise, sunshine and fresh air will keep them strong. Also, don't be surprised if YOU begin to catch whatever they have; the chances are that you have not been exposed to these strains of virus and bacteria either. Good luck and remember, it's no fun being sick and unlike adults, your kids don't have the coping skills to understand that ''this too shall pass.'' Good luck! resumerep

Someone told me this when my kid started daycare, around 15 months. And sure enough, they were right. The ages of 1 and 2 were spent contracting every miserable little bacterial infection or virus imaginable (hand-foot-and-mouth twice, pneumonia, every cold that came down the pike, something like 8 ear infections, the list goes on). About 3 months after my kid turned 3, the nonsense stoppped. Now he gets sick about twice every winter (a much more manageable list). Apparently, it doesn't matter when your kid starts interacting with other kids, (3 months or 5 years) they have to go through their two years of hell. After that, they do have at least a rudimentary immune system. Hang in there. Karen

Besides being vigilant about handwashing (which in my house, is an ideal we don't necessarily achieve and honestly, what can you do when kids just naturally do things like put their hands on the walls in BART and then lick them) I only have two suggestions for you. My first one may be controversial but here goes. I limit the Tylenol/Advil to times when it is really necessary, and refrain from automatically administering it for any slight fever. The fever has two functions in my uninformed, non-professional opinion. No. 1, it's the body's way of fighting infection and forcing a sick person to rest. No. 2, a kid with a decent fever will lie there passively watching TV and not bug the mom to death. Obviously, use the meds if the fever is high, but if it's day two or three and the fever is moderate but not high, I let him ride it out with plenty of liquids (but not too much plain water - it dehydrates!). I have my own personal "break point" I've established for when I administer Advil - you should ask your doctor.

The other tip is chicken noodle soup - not the canned kind - but homemade from your favorite Vietnamese restaurant. My favorite is Sai's in San Francisco on Jackson Street; they serve it with fresh basil leaves and a wedge of lemon. I've read that the curative powers of chicken soup aren't mythical, they're real, and I believe it.

Oh, yeah - I have a third tip for you. Put your kids in fluorescent haz mat suits - so I can see you coming. Thanks!!!!! Fran

Since I really don't know what your life style is like, and what exactly goes on in your day to day routine, it is hard to say what you are doing is ''too much'' or ''too little''. But it is really important to make sure your child is getting all the basics for good health: nutritious food, exercise, fresh air, sunshine, and plenty of rest. Probably the first place you should start to work on is boosting your childrens' immune system by feeding them highly nutritious foods, and staying away from foods that are overly processed and refined. Too much sugar and refined starches, like juices with added high fructose corn syrup, soda pop, breads, and boxed cereals are especially bad for children's health. As a way to get started you might go see a nutritionist. There is one that comes highly recommended. Her name is Nori Hudson. She came to my daughters preschool to give a talk to the parents. She had some great advice on what kinds of foods were best for children and why; how much daily sunshine and exercise they need; and how much sleep is required for their age. Nori also recommended a cookbook called ''Nourishing Traditions'' by Sally Fallon. It will give you an idea of Nori's approach to nutrition. However, if you are a vegetarian or are thinking about becoming one, this book does not support strict vegetarianism - read the introduction in the section on ''Proteins'', page 26! Laurey

Good luck! Holly

Loved your post and wanted to say that we, too, seem to be in the cycle of sick. My kids, almost 5 and 2.5, have had many of the illnesses you described since 2 weeks before Christmas with a mild stomach flu thrown in for the whole family. Happy Happy Joy Joy. I will say that I was surprised that my eldest was as striken as the younger one because she has had a pretty hardy immune system since around the time she turned 3 and I thought she was on the road to Cold Resistance. I think there is a light at the end of the tunnel but if you want to get there faster maybe you could take your kids to a homeopath? I am sure there are suggestions for them on BPN. Be well and in the mean time, have you built any indoor forts lately (blankets, pillows, chairs, cardboard boxes)? We get good mileage out of them. Another Sickie

I use a high quality infant vitamin powder that mixes easily with food or water/juice. It takes care of iron supplementation so necessary for babies and children, and does not cause the constipation of rice cereal. I also crush chewable vitamin C and alfalfa tablets (a natural decongestant and filled with trace minerals) and mix them with my baby's food to boost his immune system and help clear any congestion or fluid build-up. The key to the success of this regime, I feel, is the quality of the products I use.

I've also noticed a number of articles and studies recently about the benefits of probiotics in treating diarrhea and eczema in infants/children, allergies, and inflammatory bowel disease, colitis and Crohn's disease among adults. I use a great probiotic--easy to take, safe for babies/kids, doesn't require refrigeration, and the only product on the market that guarantees delivery of live bacteria.

I would be happy to share information if anyone is interested in learning more about what I'm doing. Please feel free to contact me at my email address. sarah

Is it normal to have so many colds?

My 14 month-old daughter has been sick off and on for the past 4- 5 months with different colds, bugs, viruses, etc. One week she is fine and the next week she has the flu, or has vomiting and diarrhea or a runny nose. Each bug or sickness seems to last anywhere from 24 hours to 5 days or so (sometimes her coughs last 3-4 weeks). We’ve taken her in to see the doctor on multiple occasions and the pediatricians tell us the same thing – “Nothing to worry about, kids get sick a lot. Give her Tylenol.” She is up to date on her immunizations. She seems to be developmentally fine (though, she does appear tired a lot).

Do kids get sick a lot? Is it normal for young children to have runny-noses, fevers, coughs, and other illness-like symptoms so frequently and for so many months in a row?

Thanks,
Trying not to be too concerned

Always sick since we started daycare

My 14-month old daughter started daycare about a month ago and ever since she's been sick. She's been coughing and having a runny nose. Just last week she had a temp. of almost 104. I've taken her to the doctor's about 4-5 times this month just to make sure her lungs and ears are ok. Anyway, she hasn't finished a full week yet (5 days). It seems like over the weekend when she's home with me, she'll recover a little bit and feel better (cough less and nose less runny) and when I take her in Monday, by Tuesday morning it starts all over again. I'm wondering if anyone out there has gone through this and if you'd have any advice for me. For the month of July, I'm going to try just bringing her 3 days a week to see if she'll do better. Many people have told me that it builds their immunity and if kids don't get sick now in daycare they will get sick when they go to pre-school or kindergarten, but I just feel like it's making her so unhealthy. What should I do?? Jane

5-month-old baby keeps getting sick

I would love to hear from other parents who have had a young baby who got sick very often. My baby is just five months. We brought him to the ER last night and doc said he has Croup. About a month and a half ago he was admitted through the ER with RSV. In between these illnesses, and before the RSV, he has had several colds. I have talked to moms with babies the same age who have not even gotten one cold yet! My baby goes to daycare fulltime and started at 2 1/2 months. Could this be the reason? Are there other reasons? Is it just bad luck??? I feel discouraged and very stressed out about all these illnesses! I worry so much about him. lola

At one point my doctor said that if she got one more ear infection, it might be time to take her out of daycare. (So you may want to ask your provider what he or she thinks) Thankfully, we didn't get to that point. I think any time your kids are going to be around other kids, the chance to pick up a bug is there. I have seen colds and flu go around our mother's group, too. Or around the nieces and nephews in our family.

What is your daycare's policy? It should be 24-hours fever, diarrhea and vomit free. Wash your hands(and your child's hands) before you leave daycare.

Best of luck. You are not alone! Paula

This went on for about a year or so..we tried homoeopathy, antibiotics, acupuncture. Nothing seemed to change anything untill I took him off of dairy. Voila!!! He got better I'm not saying your child has a dairy allergy, but dairy is one of the most likely allergies in kids (wheat also). We use goats milk in our house which he's not sensitive to so it was a matter of getting him off of cheese, switching to non dairy desserts, etc. The difference was quite amazing. Now he can eat dairy sometimes without any problem but if he eats it all the time he's in trouble. If you are big on milk you might try goat's milk. Meyenberg is a brand that doesn't taste too ''goaty'' as opposed to the raw goat milks. We're so used to it that cows milk tastes wierd to me and my kids now.

I was also told by the pediatrician that sometimes kids get a virus that stays in the body and if they have a weak immune system the virus does it's thing more often, so strengthening the immune system would be something you could look at. Good luck. I know it's frustrating...been there. June

Hang in there, your baby will get stronger. But in the meantime, I highly recommend using that Purell alcohol-type stuff (on his hands as well as yours, if your doc says it's ok), and making sure that all the daycare staff are using it religiously, that they monitor the children's toys and remove toys from rotation that have been chewed on, that they are vigilant about nose-wiping and strict about parents not bringing in kids with green runny noses. This might make you feel like one of those annoying new parents, like I fear I was (I think I was secretly called the Nose Nazi!), but this is your child! You have every right to be vigilant! You are the one who has to spend countless nights awake and terrified by your baby's raspy labored breathing or choking coughs that make him throw up! (Well I don't know if that's happened to you but it has us, on several occasions!)

At home, we keep her room EXTRA clean, we bought a good quality air purifier, we keep the cat OUT and put an extra filter in the heat duct - can't say for sure this helps but it seems to, and it sure can't hurt. We also put a (very firm) pillow in her crib so she can sleep at an incline, which definitely helps.

And finally, do whatever you can to ensure that he gets good, long naps. Sleep is crucial and healing and helps resistance. If naps are a problem at daycare, maybe you can visit at lunch to hold him for a nap...

Sorry this is so long, but your situation is soooo familiar to me I couldn't help myself! Best of luck! Been there, still there

It may or may not be daycare. They certainly are exposed to a lot of illnesses when they're with other kids. During my daughter's first winter, many people, including her pediatrician, told us that kids just get sick a lot when they're first in a group setting, whether that's infant care or kindergarten or sometime in between, so if she was missing a lot of infant care she'd be healthy when she started kindergarten. That was cold comfort when we had a sick little baby, but I am starting to feel that we did get it over with. On the other hand, my niece started full-time daycare at three months, and she's practically never been sick, and has never had an ear infection, which were the bane of my daughter's infancy, so perhaps it depends on the kid's constitution whether she ever goes through this at any age. Good luck -- spring is coming! Teresa

We get every virus that comes down the pike

It seems like my toddler son and I get every virus that comes down the pike. It has gotten to the point where I am sick all the time and maybe well for about 4 days beteween colds or flu's. My son is in childcare 2 mornings a week and has many outings with other kids. Here is the thing, we eat well, rest well and I take vitamins and herbs, tonics, garlic in fact I will try anything that I think may boost my immune system. We are under a great deal of stress reciently and I imagine that is contributing to our poor health. There is only so much I can do about the stress and I am trying to ''let it go'' but it isn't always possible. Is it normal for a toddler and his parents to be so sick? Before he was born I was never sick like this. When can I expect to be healthy again?

That said, I'm not sure that the non-daycare kids have it that much easier. My girlfriend's toddlers who weren't in daycare have been sick nearly as often as I and my son have. Basically, they're meeting other kids at her mother's group outings, at friends' houses and at the store.

Hang in there. Gwynne

I can offer a couple of pieces of advise, however. First, check the hygiene practices of your child care. Are they excluding obviously and newly sick children? Are they washing the toys on a regular basis? Are they helping the children to wash their hands regularly? Are they removing toys that have been mouthed from general circulation until they've been cleaned? Are they making sure that sippy cups aren't shared? These practices have been shown to reduce the number of infections that are passed along. Also, and I found this very helpful - don't share food with your toddler. Your drink is yours and his is his (or hers). This includes food also. Don't let your child take bites off of your fork, and don't eat your child's leftovers. That will help to minimize the passing of viruses back and forth. So your child may get sick, but at least you won't (particularly helpful for stomach flu type viruses). Also, wash your hands a lot if your child is sick (especially after blowing a nose).

I hope some of this helps you. It won't eliminate disease but it might bring it down to a manageable level. Julie

What else can I do to stay healthy?

Hi, I tend to think of myself as a healthy person (eat well, exercise, emotionally stable, etc...) but I have been ill with what seems like the flu 5 times since June. I've gotten the usual advice from my doctor: lots of fluids, rest, etc... but I am finding that being sick 7-10 days of the month is getting bothersome. The symptoms usually manifest themselves in my throat, I lose my voice, cough a lot, sore throat, low fever, nothing that can't be remedied with cold medicine but I would like to know if there is any advice that I haven't thought of on preventative steps I could take to stay healthy for longer than a month! I work with lots of children which would lead me to believe that I catch flus from them, but I try to keep my hands clean and to take care of myself. Any advice welcome.

I recently read a book that talks about how important it is to have a healthy and strong immune system (weak immune system, introduction of cold or flu virus, body can't fight it, we get sick). I've upped my dosage of Vitamin C (I usually take plenty of supplements, eat healthy etc.) and by the advice in a book about Omega 3's, I've started taking and giving both my boys Omega 3 capsules every day.

A while ago I was in Vitamin Express on Shattuck and Rose in Berkeley and I overheard the owner talking to someone she knew. They were talking about a new book about Omega 3's that just came out....she said ''...I tell people if they're not taking their Omegs 3's, don't complain about their health''. THat comment impressed me with the bit I knew about Omega 3 Fatty Acids.....so it's only been a few weeks that we've been taking this new supplement so I can't tell you if it works yet. I've also cut out sugar, as that is definately a bad food for me. Have you checked out sensitivities to foods? Wheat and dairy would be big ones....unfortunately chocolate too. You may not have an allergy, but a sensitivity which will weaken your system. Good luck. I'm interested to hear what others have to say. June

It seems like it is your weak area: your lungs and throat and throat is the entryway to lungs, so take time to nourish these organs and replenish them with nutrients that are essential for their health. I am not a doctor, but believe in combo of Western meds and holistic ways too. Take some time to read up on lungs and throat and what foods benefit their function. Simple traditional Chinese medicine book should have answers. All organs are paired up in Chinese medicine, so figure out your pair and nourish it too. Sorry, I cannot be more specific, i only had abrief intro to Holistic medicine. Take care of your lungs, Yelena lenai

Do you get as sick with the 2nd kid?

A friend and I were discussing how we were completely sleep deprived the first year of motherhood and then sick almost constantly the second year of motherhood. I am not planning on having a second child but my friend is. She is expecting to be sleep deprived again but she was wondering if she will also get as sick as much as she did with her first child. Do you become more immune to childhood illnesses with your second child or is it pretty much the same as with your first? Thanks for any advice. Madeleine