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How Much to Spend on Kids' Birthday Gifts

Berkeley Parents Network > Advice > Birthdays > Bday Gifts > How Much to Spend on Kids' Birthday Gifts


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How much are you spending on gifts for 3-5 year olds?

June 2007

The last advice I see on BPN about this is from 2002, so I'm looking for an update. How much are people spending for birthday party gifts for 3-5 year olds? Also, would you spend more for a gift because the party is extravagant, even if the child is not a particularly close friend? Thanks.


$10-15. Not more for extravagant parties - that's the party-planner's decision, not yours. -Am I cheap?
Hi. Being a single mom of limited income, I decided several years ago that my maximum for birthday presents is $20. Currently my kids are 3 and 10, and that price max works for both. My kids can pick one present under $20 or several that add up to $20. It's ok to go over a couple dollars (tax, etc.), but you can find plenty of very nice presents at reasonable costs. There is a kids' store on College near the BART station (name escapes me) that has great presents under $20 and will wrap for free. Also Michaels Arts & Crafts has so many wonderful things. Good luck! Natascha
I usually aim to spend about $20, maybe slightly more if it's someone we're particularly close to. I definitely don't let how much the parents are spending on the party influence what I spend. Not into the competition
Hi, You didn't say this, but I sense that you (and I) are trying very hard not to get caught up in current trends which seem to require that children have extravagant birthday parties, complete with extravagant gifts. Just like in ''the good ol' days'' I find that today's children would have more fun with a good-sized cardboard box than with a $100 toy.

When I shop for birthday gifts, unless the child is a very good friend, I limit the amount to $12. Not only is it more wallet friendly (especially in those months when we seem to have a party every weekend) but it forces me/my daughter to think creatively about the gift. I have her help me (after all, these are HER friends), and it gives me chances to teach her about how to shop for someone else, how to shop creatively/stay on a budget, and how to leave a store and be OK that she didn't get anything. If my daughter insists on an item that is over- budget, she has to kick in the difference from her allowance. You would think that would automatically cause her to go for an cheaper item, but not so. It DOES make her give more thought to her choice, but she is just a likely to go for it as to choose something else. Though my daughter is 8 now, we started introducing and building on these ideas when she was in the age range of your post (3-5).

Another thing I do is allow my daughter to decline invitations. I think that is just as important a part of a social life as how to behave at the party. Not to mention that a birthday party declined is very nice on the wallet. I hope this has been helpful and not TMI! Jen


I spend something between $6 and $12 dependent on what I would like to give, maybe a bit more if the kid is a good friend of the family (like $15-20). I personally don't care how extravagant the party is, that's up to those parents to decide, I still earn the same amount of money. Same for parents who consistently put us to shame with their gifts - it really doesn't make me any richer so I have my limits for giving to them. I know some people who are financially not well off, and who get really creative with their gifts, and I actually appreciate it better because they've put so much thought into it. I'm curious to see how I do on average :) mom of 2
$10 if it's just a party you were invited to because everyone was invited. $10 - $20 if it's someone your kid plays with regualarly (if I like the kid and the parents) $25 $35 reserved for the two very best friends of my son. Selected Giver
I don't spend more than $20 for that age. But I also find that it really doesn't matter because cheaper gifts can be just as popular as more expensive ones. My daughter was given a Mr. Potato Head toy (a plastic bucket with about 50 parts) when she turned 2 and it was (and still is) one of her faves. It was $10 at Target. A
We spend $10-$15 on children's birthday gifts- it is within our budget and allows plenty of choices with books/toys/art supplies etc. We would not spend more based on the extravagance of the party. The gifts my children have received have been within that price range as well, with the exception of some close friends who have a bigger budget and really love to gift others. We determine actual gift value by appropriateness- a gift the birthday boy or girl will enjoy based on age and personal interest. :) Sharon
We usually spend up to $ 15.00, and it does not matter whether the party is extravagant or not. We may spend a little more for something unique for a close friend. We try to steer away from ''plasticky'' toys and usually have our kids make their own art cards. Kasia
We spend about $10-20, usually on the lower end. We try to honor the ''no gifts please'' and ''please donate to ...'' requests, but sometimes we already bought the gift specifically for the child. jp
I spend around $10-15 per gift, maybe more if the recipient is a close friend of my child. Partygoer
We spend around $10 for birthday gifts for our daughters' friends, ages 2-9. This is the same amount we have spent since the oldest was a baby. Sometimes we go up to $15 if we need to for the perfect thing. Sometimes a little more for a close friend, esp. one who has given something special in the past. We never take the extravagance of the party into account in selecting a gift. (BTW, my daughter just attended a bday party for an 8 yr old where the most coveted gift was papers, pens, and stickers put together in a ''homemade craft kit'' so I know that the cost of a gift does not determine its value to the recipient.) --it really is the thought that counts
I have typically spent between $10-25 for birthday presents for kids that age. I might spend in the higher range for a child that is closer friends with my child and especially if I know that they really want that particular toy/item. I do not base what I spend on how ''extravagent'' the party might be... I spend what I feel I can afford. Anonymous
We spend about $20 on a gift, more (up to $30) if it is a very close friend. And a big No on whether you need to spend more for an extravagant party. You are a *guest* not a customer or audience member.
I spend $15-20 on bday gifts. I don't think you should adjust up or down depending on the type of party. It's the birthday child's parents' choice what they want to do and a gift is not an admission price in my opinion. anon
I spend less than $10, though my kids have definitely gotten presents worth double that. anon

Preschooler Price Range

April 2002

My child will be attending his first preschool-wide birthday party, and I am wondering what the current norms are on price ranges for gifts. The archives show that the standard in 1996 was about $10-15. Has it changed much?


I usually find two or three smaller, less expensive gifts and wrap each one separately. The kids like opening several gifts wrapped in fun and interesting ways - while still being easy to open, of course! They may add up to around $15. I try not to spend more than $20 unless they are really close frends. I try to not attend parties for kids we really don't know well. This saves on funds and may reduce bad feelings when they aren't invited to my kid's parties. I really like it when presents aren't opened while the guests are still around. party-loving mom

How much to spend on 4-y-o's present?

Feb 96

We've been invited to a birthady party for a four-year-old niece. We don't have any idea about what to get or what the going rate for birthday presents is, because we have just had a baby ourselves. Any advice?


I have a daughter whose fourth birthday is coming up soon, so I'm also interested in this subject. I'll throw in my comment on gifts, which is that I think they are generally in the range of $5-$10. I try to pick out gifts that are not very commercial. I'm not sure this makes me popular with the kids, but I hope it makes me popular with the parents. Some recent gifts I've picked out for children turning five are: binoculars (~$10), a science kit to grow seeds, a candle-making kit. Please let me know if anyone has any other suggestions.

This year will be the first party where we have not written on the invitation that children should not bring gifts. For parties up until age three we could get away with it, but now my daughter insists that a birthday party must include presents. I'm afraid that she'll get a lot of toys that I don't approve of, but I can't think of any way to avoid it. Beth


I agree with the message about keeping gifts at $5-10 and trying to come up with nonstandard stuff--especially nature-based and crafts. It's true that you always get gifts that you'd rather not have around the house. I've found that I can sometimes stash things in the closet immediately after the party and leave them there until they won't be missed if I donate them.

Tamra


re the birthday gift ideas: we try to stick to $7.00 a birthday, and I am always a big proponent of books! can't have enough of them, regardless of age. Jo Anne
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