What goes in the Advice newsletter?
- Problem-solving about kids, families, health, etc.
- "How-to", "What should I do?", "Has it ever happened to you?"
- Childrens' sleep, eating, health, play habits
- How to get along with your spouse, family, neighbors, etc.
- The Advice newsletter is question-and-answer format.
Therefore, all postings to Advice
Wanted should be a question, and all postings to Advice Given should be an
answer to the question. Open-ended discussion is not accepted in the
Advice newsletters.
- Advice Given responses must answer the original question, not
comment on the question, or comment on others' replies to the questions.
- Very Long Messages: Long, rambling messages tend to get fewer replies,
because most subscribers skip over questions that require a lot of
effort to read and understand. There is a limit of about 3 short paragraphs,
to keep messages easy to read and improve the chances
of getting good responses. It's best to be as concise as you can, and leave out
details that don't pertain to the question you're asking.
- Whining, Venting & Complaining: Make sure you are asking a question rather
than complaining and venting. BPN can only accept postings that ask a
question that other subscribers can reply to,
per our Q&A Policy.
Posting a laundry list of complaints about your husband or your mother-in-law
doesn't meet the Q&A requirement, and also does not meet BPN's goal of being helpful to
parents.
- Hypothetical & Metaphysical Questions: This includes questions like
"Why do people disrespect Stay-at-Home-Moms?", "Why do people allow
their children to misbehave in restaurants?", "Why do people think private
school is better?". These are not really
questions looking for answers. They are discussion
items, and they often provide a context for complaining and venting. As
explained above,
BPN can only accept postings that ask a
question that other subscribers can reply to,
per our Q&A Policy.
- Too Much Information: Messages that go into too much detail about
sex, morbidity, obsessions, bodily functions, depravity, etc. tend to get fewer replies
because they make readers uncomfortable and they can also have the
appearance of being gratuitous. For the best response, use some
discretion about descriptions of very personal information.
- Will your friend or relative recognize themselves in your post?
Be careful about asking about relationships with people who may
also subscribe to BPN or who might receive a forwarded newsletter from
someone who does. We don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. It's best to
not include details in your question that would allow people to recognize
themselves or others, such as schools, ages, neighborhood, family background, etc.
The BPN Advice Wanted newsletter
often receives questions about relationships with friends, family, kids,
and spouses. Many subscribers are interested in reading and replying to
these types of questions. Responses are often compassionate and thoughtful,
with a wide range of suggestions. Since postings can be anonymous,
BPN is a good way to get advice about
personal situations that may be hard to bring up with friends.
We recommend following the above guidelines, especially
trying to be concise and clear about what the problem is,
and taking care
not to provide so many personal details that people are recognizable.
BPN cannot accept questions that require medical, financial, or legal expertise
to answer. It is OK to ask "what is your experience with this?" or
"what would you do?".
You can ask parents how they have dealt with a particular medical condition, or what
their experience is with various health alternatives. Questions that the average parent
would know are OK.
But we cannot accept questions that require expert knowledge
and training, such as "is this legal?" or
requests for medical advice, cures and treatments. We
don't want people to have the impression that BPN is the place to
go for legal and medical advice - we aren't. Therefore, we cannot accept questions
that directly impact someone's health, or that require legal
judgement, or any other questions that really should be directed to
a doctor, a lawyer, or other expert.
Examples of questions that are OK
- "what works for eczema?"
- "what was your experience with hernia surgery?"
- "what do you do about heartburn during pregnancy?"
- "Do joint custody agreements work?"
- "Which college fund are you using?"
- "Where can I get health insurance for my nanny?"
Examples of questions that are not accepted
- "My child has a 103 degree fever, what should I do?",
- "How can I treat my gestational diabetes?",
- "Is it OK to feed my infant rice milk instead of formula?"
- "Do I need to report my consulting fees as income?"
- "Can I sue my neighbors for leaking sewer lines?"
Assuming you aren't commenting about other parents' practices and opinions,
it is OK to express an opinion that is negative or uncomplimentary,
even if it is an opinion that no one else agrees with!
However,
letters that express a negative opinion or describe a negative
experience need to be as objective as possible and give specific
examples from the writer's own experience.
See the Negative Review policy for additional
information about reviewing people, products, and businesses.